The Talk: Difference between revisions

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=== [[Fanfic]] ===

* There's a ''[[Star Trek (film)|Star Trek XI]]'' fic [http://community.livejournal.com/st_xi_kink/8314.html?thread=23814266#t23814266 here,] written for that fandom's [[Kink Meme]] where for family reasons Chekov had never been given the Talk, and the bridge team decides to rectify this. Unfortunately, rather than selecting one person to do this, almost all of them decide to chime in on it independently. Spock uses diagrams. Bones uses the [[Scare'Em Straight]] method.

** There was a hilarious one in which [[~~SPOCK~~]] is mailed a pamphlet called "[[Mate or Die|Pon Farr]] and you."

** There was a hilarious one in which [[S.P.O.C.K]] is mailed a pamphlet called "[[Mate or Die|Pon Farr]] and you."

* A particularly funny ''[[Naruto]]'' fanfic had Naruto going around and asking all the adults in the village what sex is and keeping a journal of the info he gets as they all either brush him off or give him lewd advice. "NEVER GO INTO ANKO'S HOUSE! She has a bunch of weird equipment and she's hard to get away from when she gets her clothes off."

** ''[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3313914/1/ Fetish? What's A Fetish?]'', a hilarious story about Naruto and Sasuke (Not like that, pervs) finding out all about sex and fetishes. And I do mean all, [[Sqee]] and [[Squick]] included. It's funny, but can also be serious when the author feels the need.

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{{quote|'''Teal'c''': Before your departure, there is a matter that bears discussion.

'''Rya'c''': Father, I am aware of the ways between a man and a woman.

'''Teal'c''': Good. Then you are prepared for the [[Sting|Rite of Or'nok]].

'''Teal'c''': Good. Then you are prepared for the [[Sting (music)||Rite of Or'nok]].

'''Rya'c''': Surely it is not still expected?

'''Teal'c''': On the first eve of shim'owa. My advice is that the knife be as sharp as possible.

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* An episode of ''[[Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman]]'' played the trope semi-straight for a different kind of comedy. After her son was spotted when he tried to spy on some skinny-dipping girls, his mother decides he's old enough for The Talk... and, being a medical doctor, proceeds to read from a textbook on the subject. For hours, apparently. He's bored stiff [[That Came Out Wrong|(NOT THAT WAY)]] and more confused than ever by the end.

** Ironically, Dr. Quinn ends up needing a version of The Talk herself, with her only knowledge of sex coming from her medical books. Despite being a 30-something woman, she's still a virgin and nervous about her impending wedding night. Luckily, her friend Dorothy is there to offer her advice.

* A sketch from Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's show ''[[Not Only ~~but~~ Also]]'' has an upper-class British gent trying to explain the facts of life with his naive 18 year old son, who doesn't want to believe the "filthy things they say at school". After much stalling ("In order for you to be brought about... it was necessary for your mother and I... to do something.") he makes wild claims that his son's conception was through his mother sitting in the same chair that he had been in and "was still warm... from my body". The conversation eventually escalates into them discussing Uncle Bertie ("Dirty Uncle Bertie they call him at school." "And they're right, Roger! Uncle Bertie is a dirty, ''dirty'' man"). [http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=d0Z1QGpTZSo The sketch can be viewed here].

* A sketch from Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's show ''[[Not Only... But Also]]'' has an upper-class British gent trying to explain the facts of life with his naive 18 year old son, who doesn't want to believe the "filthy things they say at school". After much stalling ("In order for you to be brought about... it was necessary for your mother and I... to do something.") he makes wild claims that his son's conception was through his mother sitting in the same chair that he had been in and "was still warm... from my body". The conversation eventually escalates into them discussing Uncle Bertie ("Dirty Uncle Bertie they call him at school." "And they're right, Roger! Uncle Bertie is a dirty, ''dirty'' man"). [http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=d0Z1QGpTZSo The sketch can be viewed here].

* Subverted by a ''[[A Bit of Fry and Laurie]]'' sketch in which Fry asks Laurie (playing his son) if he knows where babies come from. Laurie replies "I always sort of assumed that you put your penis into mummy's vagina and then intercourse occured". Fry responds that this is indeed what they told him but that it is a bit more complicated than that, going on to say that somehow carpets are involved in the process. (The whole sketch turns into a spoof plug for the show's supposed sponsor's "Tideyman's Carpets').

** Even better in another Fry and Laurie sketch when a father (Laurie) brings his son to the headmaster (Fry) complaining about the "vulgar lies" his son had been taught in his biology class. "Sexual intercourse sometimes leads to pregnancy in the adult female." Apparently the man believed that children came out of nowhere after a man and woman had gotten married and bought a house.

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=== [[Web Comics]] ===

* In [http://www.egscomics.com/?date=2005-10-12 this] ''[[El Goonish Shive]]'' strip Susan, a teenage girl who's [[Gender Bender|currently a boy]] to make things even more awkward, has to give The Talk to [[Innocent Fanservice Girl]] Grace who already knew about sex but didn't understand [[No Social Skills|why everyone else was so hung up about nudity]].

* Spoofed in a ''[[Cyanide ~~and~~ Happiness]]'' comic, where, just after the father tells the son about the birds and the bees, the son replies "Let me get this straight... First there's a momma bird and poppa bird, and now you're telling me they actually have ''sex'' with bees? What type of disconnected, interspecies bullsh* t is this?"

* Spoofed in a ''[[Cyanide & Happiness]]'' comic, where, just after the father tells the son about the birds and the bees, the son replies "Let me get this straight... First there's a momma bird and poppa bird, and now you're telling me they actually have ''sex'' with bees? What type of disconnected, interspecies bullsh* t is this?"

* Cut short in ''[[Dan and Mab's Furry Adventures|DMFA]]'' after Dan makes the mistake of asking Fa'Lina, who has appeared uninvited in his house, "So where did you come from?"

** In fact, there is a [[Running Gag]] of someone starting a phrase by "Sometimes a male and female X love each other", to elicit a [[Too Much Information]] response.

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'''Prozac''': (closes the notebook) Go watch some nature shows.

'''Prozac''': Or go to the petting zoo. The rabbits are always busy. (leaves) }}

* Subverted (naturally) in ''[[Something Positive]]'', where the worldly Mr. Sanderson winds up giving The Talk to Davan's not-quite-son Rory. Rory, who remembers his mother saying Davan might have been his actual father, is only too quick to [http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp08052011.shtml put two and two together].

* Subverted (naturally) in ''[[Something*Positive]]'', where the worldly Mr. Sanderson winds up giving The Talk to Davan's not-quite-son Rory. Rory, who remembers his mother saying Davan might have been his actual father, is only too quick to [http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp08052011.shtml put two and two together].

* [[Subverted]] in ''[[Tales From the Pit]]''.

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=== [[Film]] ===

* In the original ''[[The Parent Trap]]'', the father decides to have the Talk with Sharon (disguised as Susan) on a golf course, assuming that's why she's wanting to know about her mother all of a sudden. After a few minutes of awkward explanation, Sharon tells him she's known about ''that'' for ages.

* In the original ''[[The Parent Trap (1961 film)|The Parent Trap]]'', the father decides to have the Talk with Sharon (disguised as Susan) on a golf course, assuming that's why she's wanting to know about her mother all of a sudden. After a few minutes of awkward explanation, Sharon tells him she's known about ''that'' for ages.

* The live-action ''[[Casper (film)|Casper]]'' movie included this brief exchange:

{{quote|'''Kat''': I want to look... nice, like... like date nice.

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*** Played straight(er) later by Martin talking to Jeremy about a completely different and wrapping up by saying it was "as awkward as bad sex".

* On ''[[Home Improvement]]'' Tim has already long given Brad The Talk, being that he is supposed to be about 15, but things are a bit complicated when there is suspicion that Brad is active with his girlfriend. This leads to Tim having to specify concepts of safe-sex and things get even more awkward when Brad asks him about his first time. They have an honest discussion, which finishes with..

* On ''[[Home Improvement (TV series)|Home Improvement]]'' Tim has already long given Brad The Talk, being that he is supposed to be about 15, but things are a bit complicated when there is suspicion that Brad is active with his girlfriend. This leads to Tim having to specify concepts of safe-sex and things get even more awkward when Brad asks him about his first time. They have an honest discussion, which finishes with..

{{quote|Brad: "So, when will I know I'm a man?"

Tim: "Your Mom and I will tell you!" }}

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* In the webcomic ''[[Nip and Tuck]]'', Nip at the very least had a pretty clear idea of what sex was for from an extremely young age-after Tuck and Thelma walk in on Nip & Tuck's parents getting over "Empty Nest Syndrome", the parents reminisce about when the boys were five - cut to five-year-old Nip in a onesie, asking, "Are Tuck and me gonna have a widdle bwuvver?" "No, sweetie..." "Then what was all that for?!" His knowledge is possibly justified given that he's a farm kid and has probably seen the equivalent behaviour in [[Furry Confusion|the non-anthro animals]].

* Webcomic ''[[Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal]]'' [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=311 is] [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1251#comic a] ''[http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1502#comic really]'' [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1195#comic huge] [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=488#comic fan] [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=943#comic of] [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1142#comic this] [http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1240#comic trope.]

* ''[[Something Positive]]'': [http://somethingpositive.net/sp04112005.shtml Here] we see the aftermath of Davan's father giving him the Talk.

* ''[[Something*Positive]]'': [http://somethingpositive.net/sp04112005.shtml Here] we see the aftermath of Davan's father giving him the Talk.

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[[Category:Sex Tropes]]

[[Category:Comedy Tropes]]

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[[Category:~~The Talk~~]]

[[Category:No Real Life Examples, Please]]

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