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== Season 3 ==
=== ''Super Car'' ===
'''Endora''': I think you're just noticing it for the first time.
=== ''The Corn is as High as a Guernsey's Eye'' ===
{{quote|Just because you chose to be a cow doesn't mean you have to be a stupid one.
{{quote|'''Samantha''': You see, everything turns out for the best.
'''Darrin''': Yeah, when you're around to give everything a big assist, it does.}}
=== ''The Trial and Error of Aunt Clara'' ===
{{quote|'''Darrin''': I know why you don't want to let me in there.
'''Samantha''': You do?
'''Darrin''': Mm-hm. I finally figured it out. Ladies club, right?
'''Samantha''': Sort of.
'''Darrin''': Is it the committee for the bazaar?
'''Samantha''': Oh, I'd certainly call them a bizarre committee.
|''Samantha is trying to hide a witches court meeting (attended by Endora, Clara, Enchantra and Hagatha) from Darrin in the other room.''}}
=== ''Three Wishes'' ===
|Darrin}}
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Darrin, I'm leaving you.
'''Darrin''': Sam!
'''Samantha''': I'm going home to mother.
'''Darrin''': What do you mean "going home to mother"? Your mother's always here.}}
=== ''Cousin Serena Strikes Again'' ===
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Personally, I think she should see a plastic surgeon.
'''Darrin''': What for?
|''Referring to Darrin's beautiful, but snobby, client.''}}
=== ''Charlie Harper, Winner'' ===
{{quote|'''Darrin''': Believe me honey, I don't feel bad. As a matter of fact, I feel great. I finally beat Charlie at something.
'''Samantha''': You said you lost by 12 strokes.
'''Darrin''': 11.
'''Darrin''': But we flipped a coin to see who'd tip the caddy and I won. It cost me ten bucks, but I won.
|''After losing to Charlie all day.''}}
=== ''The Crone of Cawdor'' ===
|Samantha|''Legend of the Crone of Cawdor''}}
== Season 4==
=== ''My What Big Ears You Have''===
== Season 5 ==
=== ''Darrin, Gone and Forgotten'' ===
{{quote|'''Samantha''': I thought you and mother were getting along rather well lately. You were almost on speaking terms.
'''Darrin''': Let's hope it stays 'almost'.}}
{{quote|Now, mother. I'm sorry to have to ask you to do this, but repeat after me ... Spiders that crawl, bats that fly, silence my tongue if I'm telling a lie.
|Samantha}}
{{quote|'''Maurice''': Uncle Arthur! That's it! Uncle Arthur is using Darrin for one of his practical jokes.
'''Endora''': Well, why would he do a thing like that? Derwood is already a practical joke.
|''Samantha is trying to figure out who has taken Darrin.''}}
=== ''It's So Nice to Have a Spouse Around the House'' ===
{{quote|I've not only lost a daughter, I've gained a bullhorn.
|Endora, ''after Darrin yells out loud.''}}
=== ''Mirror, Mirror On The Wall'' ===
{{quote|'''Endora''': Fortunately for you, I don't offend easily.
|''After Darrin insults Endora''}}
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Mr Haskem, you really should listen to Darrin. He has his finger on the pulse of today.
'''Larry Tate''': And his foot on the unemployment line of tomorrow.}}
=== ''Samantha's French Pastry'' ===
{{quote|When you cast your spell, you probably faced west when you should have faced 'yeast'.
|Uncle Arthur, ''joking about Samantha's unrisen Angel Food Cake''}}
{{quote|'''Darrin''': I don't believe it. In our living room, in person, sits Napoleon Bonaparte.
'''Samantha''': Yeah. You're the only living human being who can say he's had Napoleon Bonaparte as a guest in his house. It's ironic.
'''Darrin''': [[Irony|Ironic?]]
'''Samantha''': Yes. Who can you say it to?}}
=== ''Is It Magic Or Imagination?'' ===
{{quote|The point is, your slogan was rejected, it was lousy. Which proves it was your imagination!
|Darrin ''is trying to apologize to Samantha, for accusing her of using witchcraft to win a slogan competition''}}
=== ''Samantha Fights City Hall'' ===
=== ''Samantha Loses Her Voice'' ===
{{quote|Have you ever seen Louise play volleyball? Her best shot is ducking.
=== ''I Don't Want to Be a Toad, I Want to Be a Butterfly'' ===
{{quote|'''Tabitha''': Is this one of those things that's called a problem?
|''After Tabitha has changed her classmate into a butterfly.''}}
=== ''Weep No More My Willow'' ===
== Season 8 ==
=== ''A Plague on Maurice and Samantha'' ===
|Maurice}}
{{quote|Alas, poor Yorick. He isn't well.
|Maurice ''dismisses his driver (named Yorick), who coughs before disappearing.''}}
{{quote|'''Darrin's client''': And Mrs Stephens. You should be very proud of your father. I think he's dynamite.
'''Samantha''': Ooh, I do too. And, uh, I never know when he might explode.}}
=== ''
{{quote|'''Larry Tate''': Darren, why are you carrying that leg of lamb?
'''Darrin''': [[Comically Missing the Point|Well, in the condition it's in, it couldn't very well walk by itself.]]}}
=== ''The Warlock In The Grey Flannel Suit'' ===
{{quote|'''Samantha''': One thing you can say about my mother. She's a mother-in-law.
'''Darrin''': The one thing ''I'' can say about your mother is censorable.
|''After finding out that Endora has cast yet another spell on Darrin.''}}
=== ''The Eight-Year Witch'' ===
{{quote|'''Endora''': Have you ever heard of the syndrome peculiar to mortal men? The seven year itch? Seven years marriage and it's off with the old and on with the new.
'''Samantha''': In case you hadn't noticed, Darrin and I have been married for ''eight'' years.
'''Endora''': You see, Derwood can't do anything right.
|''After Endora finds photographs of beautiful models in swimsuits in Darrin's briefcase.''}}
=== ''Three Men And A Witch On a Horse'' ===
{{quote|Look at what this fellow says about Count of Valor. "Couldn't beat a fat man up a hill".
|Samantha, ''reading a newspaper betting column. She is trying to dissuade Darrin from betting on the horse.''}}
{{quote|'''Darrin''': Hello. I'd like to place a bet. My account number is A231. My codename is 'Dog'.
'''Samantha''': And so's your horse.
|''Darrin is phoning the betting company to place a bet on a horse.''}}
{{quote|'''Samantha''': He'll catch up.
'''Larry Tate''': Only if they race to Albany.
|''When Count of Valor is at the back of the field in the race.''}}
=== ''Adam, Warlock or Washout?'' ===
{{quote|'''Maurice''': She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies. And all that's best of dark and bright meet in her aspect and her eyes.
'''Samantha''': Aw, thank you, Daddy. [[Small Reference Pools|You and Byron]] say the cutest things.}}
{{quote|'''Endora''': Maurice, this exhibition is absurd. Childishly flamboyant and pathetically egomaniacical.
'''Maurice''': Thank you, Endora, your charm is ageless. So sad about the rest of you.
|''Maurice is greeting Samantha.''}}
{{quote|'''Tabitha''': Hello, Grandpapa.
'''Maurice''': Tabitha! How is my little princess?
|''Maurice is greeting Tabitha.''}}
{{quote|'''Maurice''': Let me tell you what I think the problem is. This child has been brought up in an atmosphere that has inhibited the growth of his witchcraft.
'''Endora''': You see, Samantha's husband - that mortal lamebrain - absolutely forbids the use of witchcraft in this house.
'''Witches Council Representative #1''': No.
'''Endora''': Yes.
'''Witches Council Representative #2''': No!
'''Endora''': Yes!
'''Witches Council Representative #1''': No!!!
'''Endora''': Why do you keep saying 'No' when I keep saying 'Yes'!!!
|''Explaining why Adam has not shown any signs of being a warlock.''}}
=== ''Samantha is Earthbound'' ===
{{quote|'''Mr. Prescott''': That's a pretty squirrely couple
|''After witnessing Samantha and Darrin walking along while hugging each other closely (to prevent Samantha from being lifted into the air!)''}}
=== ''Samantha on Thin Ice'' ===
=== ''Serena's Youth Pill'' ===
{{quote|Do me a favour, call Berlitz and get me a translator
|Larry Tate ''doesn't understand what Louise is getting at!''}}
=== ''Tabitha's First Day at School'' ===
{{quote|'''Charlton's mom''': Why does he keep saying that?
'''Samantha''': Well, maybe it's a case of ego identification.
'''Charlton's mom''': Yeah. [She thinks for a second.] What's that?
'''Samantha''': Well, a bullfrog suggests bully, doesn't it?
'''Charlton's mom''': Yes.
'''Samantha''': Do you follow me?
'''Charlton's mom''': No.
'''Samantha''': Children need love and understanding. Without it, they sometimes become overly aggressive and turn into bullies.
'''Charlton's mom''': Oh. Charlton, did you really think you were a bullfrog?
'''Charlton, the bully''': I WAS a bullfrog.
'''Samantha''': Love and understanding, Mrs Rollnick.
|''After Charlton keeps insisting that Tabitha turned him into a bullfrog.''}}
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Young lady! You have nothing to laugh about, you started this whole mess. Now, how are we gonna deal with you?
'''Tabitha''': I have an idea.
'''Samantha''': Why is it that I feel like the fox thats been cornered by the chicken!?
|''After Samantha has convinced the bully's mother that he only imagined himself as a bullfrog''}}
=== ''George Washington Zapped Here'' ===
'''Samantha''': That's Abraham Lincoln. The 16th president.
'''George Washington''': He must have been a very fine president to have his name honored on a $5 bill.
'''George Washington''': Better than me?
'''Darrin''': Oh, I wouldn't say that.
'''George Washington''': Then why is President Lincoln's name on a $5 bill while the father of his country is only on a $1 bill?
'''Samantha''': Well, you see, more people can afford $1 bills than $5 bills which means more people see your picture than Abraham Lincoln's.
|''After George Washington sees Abraham Lincoln's face on the $5 bill and his on the $1 bill''}}
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Sometimes, it's easier to be led than to lead. And a great many of our citizens prefer to stand on the sidelines and ignore their rights instead of defend them. They're called "The Silent Majority".
'''George Washington''': Experience has shown that mankind is more disposed to suffer evils while those evils are sufferable, than to right themselves and abolish those abuses.}}
{{quote|How come you witches can do anything, but you can't come up with a witch psychiatrist for her!
|Darrin, ''referring to Esmerelda''}}
=== ''School Days, School Daze'' ===
{{quote|'''Samantha''': How would you like a drink?
'''Darrin''': Sam, just give me the news, without the anaesthetic.}}
=== '' A Good Turn Never Goes Unpunished'' ===
{{quote|'''Samantha''': Did Larry like it?
'''Darrin''': He hated it. Right up until the time that Benson loved it.}}
=== ''Samantha's Witchcraft Blows a Fuse'' ===
{{quote|There goes one of the great quackpots of all time.
|Samantha, ''referring to Dr. Bombay''}}
=== ''The Truth, Nothing But the Truth, So Help Me Sam'' ===
{{quote|'''Darrin''': Honey. You're beautiful, sweet, clever, adorable and I love you madly. ''[referring to the spell]'' It works.
== [[Catch Phrase]]s ==
|
Latest revision as of 20:44, 19 June 2024
Season 3
Super Car
Samantha: Mother, Darrin's off today. —Endora 'pops' in while Darrin has a day off from work.
|
The Corn is as High as a Guernsey's Eye
Just because you chose to be a cow doesn't mean you have to be a stupid one. —Samantha is trying to convince a cow (who she believes to be Aunt Clara) to go to the kitchen. It won't budge.
|
Samantha: You see, everything turns out for the best. |
The Trial and Error of Aunt Clara
Three Wishes
That was no lady, that was my mother-in-law! —Darrin
|
Samantha: Darrin, I'm leaving you. |
Cousin Serena Strikes Again
Samantha: Personally, I think she should see a plastic surgeon. —Referring to Darrin's beautiful, but snobby, client.
|
Charlie Harper, Winner
The Crone of Cawdor
Season 4
My What Big Ears You Have
Season 5
Darrin, Gone and Forgotten
Samantha: I thought you and mother were getting along rather well lately. You were almost on speaking terms. |
Now, mother. I'm sorry to have to ask you to do this, but repeat after me ... Spiders that crawl, bats that fly, silence my tongue if I'm telling a lie. —Samantha
|
It's So Nice to Have a Spouse Around the House
I've not only lost a daughter, I've gained a bullhorn. —Endora, after Darrin yells out loud.
|
Mirror, Mirror On The Wall
Endora: Fortunately for you, I don't offend easily. —After Darrin insults Endora
|
Samantha: Mr Haskem, you really should listen to Darrin. He has his finger on the pulse of today. |
Samantha's French Pastry
When you cast your spell, you probably faced west when you should have faced 'yeast'. —Uncle Arthur, joking about Samantha's unrisen Angel Food Cake
|
Darrin: I don't believe it. In our living room, in person, sits Napoleon Bonaparte. |
Is It Magic Or Imagination?
Samantha Fights City Hall
Samantha Loses Her Voice
Have you ever seen Louise play volleyball? Her best shot is ducking. —Larry Tate, explaining why he didn't pick his wife for his volleyball team
|
I Don't Want to Be a Toad, I Want to Be a Butterfly
Weep No More My Willow
Mrs Kravitz: Abner! Darrin Stephens is talking to a strange woman. |
Season 8
A Plague on Maurice and Samantha
Endora, you have all the charm of a tse-tse fly. —Maurice
|
Alas, poor Yorick. He isn't well. —Maurice dismisses his driver (named Yorick), who coughs before disappearing.
|
Darrin's client: And Mrs Stephens. You should be very proud of your father. I think he's dynamite. |
Hansel And Gretel In Samanthaland
Larry Tate: Darren, why are you carrying that leg of lamb? |
The Warlock In The Grey Flannel Suit
The Eight-Year Witch
Three Men And A Witch On a Horse
Look at what this fellow says about Count of Valor. "Couldn't beat a fat man up a hill". —Samantha, reading a newspaper betting column. She is trying to dissuade Darrin from betting on the horse.
|
Darrin: Hello. I'd like to place a bet. My account number is A231. My codename is 'Dog'. —Darrin is phoning the betting company to place a bet on a horse.
|
Samantha: He'll catch up. —When Count of Valor is at the back of the field in the race.
|
Adam, Warlock or Washout?
Maurice: She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies. And all that's best of dark and bright meet in her aspect and her eyes. |
Samantha is Earthbound
Samantha on Thin Ice
Serena's Youth Pill
In gay Paree it's s'il vous plaît, in Germany it's bitte. Please, Serena, come this way, I need a baby sitter.
—Samantha
|
Do me a favour, call Berlitz and get me a translator —Larry Tate doesn't understand what Louise is getting at!
|
Tabitha's First Day at School
Darrin: Is Tabitha ready for school? |
Charlton, the bully: What kind of dumb name is Tabitha? |
George Washington Zapped Here
How come you witches can do anything, but you can't come up with a witch psychiatrist for her! —Darrin, referring to Esmerelda
|
School Days, School Daze
Samantha: How would you like a drink? |
A Good Turn Never Goes Unpunished
Just because blondes have more fun doesn't make them brainless, you know?
—Samantha
|
Samantha: Did Larry like it? |
Samantha's Witchcraft Blows a Fuse
There goes one of the great quackpots of all time. —Samantha, referring to Dr. Bombay
|
The Truth, Nothing But the Truth, So Help Me Sam
Catch Phrases
Oh my stars!
—Samantha
|
Weeell?
—Samantha
|
SAMANTHA!
—Darrin
|
- Back to Bewitched