It Tastes Like Feet: Difference between revisions

[[File:footsandwich.jpg|frame|Well... I guess that's understandable.]]

 

 

For some reason, people tend to describe foods that taste terrible in terms of things that no sane person has any right to know what it tastes like.

 

See also [[Tastes Like Purple]], for things it shouldn't even be possible to taste. May or may not be invoked for [[Foreign Queasine]] or [[A Tankard of Moose Urine]].

{{examples}}

{{quote|'''James''': "It has a hint of...[[Ooh, Me Accent's Slipping|how you say]]...jet fuel. With ze aftertaste of burning tortoise."}}

* In ''[[Moyashimon]]'', Tadayasu describes the taste of [[Foreign Queasine|hongeohoe]] (stingray sashimi that's been fermented in the ray's own urea and digestive juices) like this: "You know how at campsites, the filthy cramped men's bathroom just has one long urinal trough? I feel like I just picked up a piece of toilet paper that's been stewing in there for a few weeks and put it in my mouth."

* In an early chapter of ''[[Gintama]]'', Gin puts [http://www.mangareader.net/307-21387-5/gintama/chapter-48.html some of everything in the fridge into their nabe.] When [[Big Eater|Kagura]] tries it, she comments, "It tastes like Gin-chan's feet." Promptly lampshaded by Gin.

* ''[[Crayon Shin-chan]]'': According to Shin-chan, green peppers taste like crotch.

 

== Comic Books ==

*pause*

'''Cassidy''': "[[Or So I Heard|...or so I'd assume.]]" }}

* In ''[[Astro City]]'', Astra Furst says her breakfast tastes "manganese-flavor" (after her mother tells her it is supposed to be grape-flavor). Still, if anyone is going to know what manganese tastes like, it's probably Astra.

* A variation occurs in one episode of ''[[Suske en Wiske]]'' (Spike and Suzy). Two cigarette-smoking [[Mooks]] are guarding a shed when it catches fire, prompting one mook to ask the other "Hey, are you smoking your mattress?"

 

 

== Film ==

** I always thought she was referring to the viscosity, not the flavor.

*** [[Gargle Blaster|Why can't it be both?]]

** Since blowing up balloons involves putting them in your mouth, anyone who's ever decorated with non-helium balloon knows what they taste like.

{{quote|''Austin'': Basil, this coffee smells like shit.

''Basil'': It ''is'' shit, Austin.

{{quote|'''Earl:''' Ugh. This tastes like toilet paper!

'''Grady:''' Earl, that ''is'' the toilet paper. }}

* ''[[Anchorman]]'': "It smells like Bigfoot's dick!"

* ''[[Down Periscope]]''

* [[Clerks II|"Hey Silent Bob, does this shit taste like piss and flies to you too?"]]

* In ''[[Scream (film)|Scream]] 4'', Gale claims that Judy's lemon squares taste like ass.

 

== Literature ==

* In ''[[Dave Barry]] Does Japan'' Dave describes trying out a Japanese energy drink called Hugo, and all he can say is "it better be healthful, because it tastes like coyote spit."

* In [[Tamora Pierce]]'s ''[[Circle of Magic]]'' books, a character is made to drink willow tea, which she complains tastes like horse urine. Coolly, the healer informs her that horse urine tastes far worse.

*** Possibly [[Shown Their Work]], as all Igors are primitive doctors, and taste-testing urine samples is an ancient means of diagnosing ailments such as diabetes.

{{quote|'''Esk''' (to bartender): "Milk. You know, ''milk''. You get it from cows."

'''Narrator''': All the bartender had was beer, which his customers claimed he got from cats... }}

*** In Ankh-Morpork, you don't buy beer - you rent it (just think about it for one minute). Of course, it's better than the river "water".

**** Which is only called such because it's too thin to plow...

* At one point in [[Stephen King]]'s ''[[The Dark Tower|Dark Tower]]'' series of novels, Eddie asks Roland if raccoon-like billy-bumblers make good eating. Roland answers no, they're horrible: tough and gamy, and he'd sooner eat dog. When quizzed, he confirms that, yes, he's also eaten dog meat.

* In ''[[Animorphs]]'', this is Lampshaded when Rachel comments that a force field they're swimming through generates a sensation 'like chewing on aluminium foil with a mouth full of fillings' and Marco asks her how she'd know what that feels like...

* The book ''Good Morning, Miss Dove'' had a flashback sequence in which the title character, teaching about the habits of a species of bear, mentioned that they liked to eat red ants, which taste like cinnamon. A smart-alecky student asked how the textbook's writer '''knew''' how they tasted. "Did he taste some? Or did he ask a bear?" (Miss Dove reprimanded her; raising a legitimate question was fine, but the "ask a bear" part was going too far.) In the story's present day, it's revealed that the student later actually ate some red ants as an experiment and found that they '''do''' taste like cinnamon.

* A character in Tom Wolfe's novel ''[[The Bonfire of the Vanities]]'' says that Chinese wine tastes like dead mouse. In this case the phrase probably comes to him because The Dead Mouse is his nickname for his boss.

* One of the stories in one of the ''[[Clue (game)|Clue]]'' books revolves around the characters' favorite soda flavors. Most of them are innocuous, albeit strange flavors for soda: mouthwash, yams, grape jam, chicken, and squash. Mrs. White's favorite, however, tastes like ''floor wax'' (as in, that's what it's actually ''supposed'' to taste like).

* Example of a positive comparison in ''[[Paper Towns]]'': Lacey tastes a GoFast bar for the first time and says it [[Tastes Like Purple|"tastes like hope feels".]] Ben describes the taste of GoFast bars as "what blood tastes like to mosquitoes", which was probably ''intended'' as a positive comparison but makes them sound a lot less appealing.

* How does ''[[Harry Potter]]'''s Dumbledore know what earwax tastes like to compare Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Beans?

*** If you don't get out of childhood without knowing what earwax tastes like, you've got issues.

*** So you mean to tell me that you've never scratched the itchy inside of your ear with a fingernail, then forgotten and later licked something off said finger? Lies.

** In part 1 of the film version of ''Deathly Hallows'', Mad-Eye Moody claims that Polyjuice Potion "tastes roughly like goblin piss", and Fred Weasley can't resist making a joke about how Moody knows what goblin piss tastes like.

{{quote|'''Fred:''' [[Crowning Moment of Funny|...Just...trying to diffuse the tension.]]}}

* ''[[Agatha H and The Airship City]]'':

{{quote|But this - this was new low. He looked at the crudely printed label on the bottle in his hand. "Beetle Beer" it proclaimed. Fair enough, he thought, I can believe that.}}

 

== Live-Action TV ==

** Note that even after everyone expresses disgust with the dish, [[Big Eater]] Joey ''still'' eats it and loves it. Afterwards he even sneaks around and finishes up the portions that everybody else abandoned.

{{quote|"What's not to like. Whip cream? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? ''Good''."}}

* ''[[I Love Lucy]]'': Upon tasting watercress, Lucy remarks "Very tasty... if you like buttered grass."

* Bear Grylls of ''[[Man vs. Wild]]'' once compared drinking from a natural watering hole to "a bit like drinking from the loo bowl".

** From another episode, Brent's description of Oscar's homemade beer:

{{quote|"Oh, really dad, it tastes like you beat a skunk to death with a salmon!"}}

** Subverted when Kari was filling a Goliath beetle simulaid with yogurt "bug guts": "Yes, I do know what bug guts taste like. Thanks to this show."

** In another episode, Adam was the official guinea pig to test a mouthwash myth. Of course, before testing, he needed to have really bad breath. He described one of the culinary delights offered up to create this as "stinky foot cheese".

* Happens with Gabe's homemade health tonic in ''[[Life With Boys]]''. In a [[Strange Minds Think Alike]] moment, everybody who tastes it likens its taste to some kind of mythological creature in a bathing facility of some kind; e.g. "a gnome's steam bath" or "a hairy troll's hot tub".

* In ''[[Party Down]]'', Steve Guttenburg tries to teach some of the caterers how to be cultured by giving them fine wine. They give a variety of responses as to what they taste, including "rope" and "dirt." Guttenburg compliments them.

 

== Music ==

* [[Eric Bogle]]'s "Goodbye Lucky Country":

{{quote|The beer still tastes like glue}}

 

== Newspaper Comics ==

** In another strip, Jeremy describes wheatgrass juice as tasting "like licking the underside of an old John Deere riding lawnmower!"

** And, according to Pierce, if you dip Salisbury steak in pudding it tastes just like squirrel.

{{quote|'''Jon:''' "Irma, Is this tea or coffee?"

'''Irma:''' "What does it taste like?"

'''Irma:''' "Oh, that's our coffee. Our tea tastes like transmission fluid." }}

 

* After someone described the taste of Vegemite as "like licking a cat's ass," comic Billy Connolly asked "How does she know?"

** [[Amanda Palmer]] has an entire song on the evils of Vegemite, which includes "It tastes like sadness. It tastes like batteries. It tastes like asses." [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fVKPrQv1H8I Enjoy it for yourself].

*** "...and occasionally, you get a subtle one, that makes you go 'Urk! Ack! Hmm, that's quite all right!'"

* Original flavor ''NyQuil'': Let [[Denis Leary]] explain:

* Nick Swardson said, at one point, that he wants to be very difficult when he's an old man, and as an example said that he would complain about restaurant food, specifically, sending it back while complaining that it tastes like "wolf pussy."

 

== Urban Legends ==

** He responds ([[Science Marches On|incorrectly]]) that the taste buds for sweetness are at the tip of the tongue, not the back of the throat.

 

* In ''[[Deus Ex]]'', the following exchange takes place in a bar:

{{quote|'''JC Denton:''' "How are the drinks here?"

** In ''[[Dragon Age 2]]'''s ''Mark of the Assassin'' DLC, an elven servant offers Hawke and Tallis ham that "tastes of despair"; another party guest can be heard commenting on its unique flavor later on.

* A background conversation in ''[[Mass Effect 2]]'' has Engineer Daniels complain to Engineer Donnelly that "all haggis tastes like ass", to which Donnelly replies "Aye, but in the right hands, it can taste like mighty fine arse."

{{quote|'''Crewman Hawthorne''': Rupert! There's something different with tonight's meal! Seems like you put in more food and less ass.

'''Mess Sargent Rupert Gardner''' [sarcastically]: Yeah, yeah, keep talkin'. }}

{{quote|'''Three Sheets Dutong:''' I hate that restorative potion! Ugh! That stuff tastes like vomit baked in a glaze of goat hair and garnished with a sprinkling of horse dung.}}

* ''[[The Sims]] Medieval'' has a moodlet "Tasteless Treat: That tasted like sheep hooves, only worse!"

* In ''The Secret Armory of General Knoxx'' DLC of ''[[Borderlands]]'', the titular General Knoxx describes [[Death World|Pandora]] as smelling like "Hemorrhoids wrapped in bacon".

 

== Web Animation ==

* In ''[[Red vs. Blue]]'', Grif, while under the effects of a malfunctioning speed unit, mentions that he can smell clouds.

 

* One ''[[Friendly Hostility]]'' strip features Derringer, at Fox's urging, brushing his teeth with expired toothpaste. He promptly exclaims, "Gross! It tastes like going down on a chick on the rag!" When Fox looks at him sceptically, he says that toothpaste should not be used after six months; Fox replies, "Shut up, Captain Redwings."

* ''[[Filthy Lies]]'': The cast taste a certain kind of beer for the first time and all find it horrible. Ted declares that it tastes "like going down on a dead hooker." When the others look at him strangely, he says "What? I thought she was just bored!"

* A non-food-related [[Lampshade Hanging]] can be found in [http://suicideforhire.comicgenesis.com/d/20050817.html this] ''[[Suicide for Hire]]'' strip.

* Done literally in [http://www.punchanpie.net/cgi-bin/autokeenlite.cgi?date=20081210 this] ''Punch an' Pie''.

* ''[[Between Failures]]'': Carol sums up the taste of game-themed drinks nicely in [http://betweenfailures.com/2007/08/06/91-sweet-warm-liquid-fail/ this] strip.

** Thomas tries the same drink a few strips later. [http://betweenfailures.com/2007/08/21/106-before-the-fact/ He isn't quite as tactful as Carol.]

** Later, a Power Bar when she's famished prompts the line, "Oh my! It's like a concert in my mouth and I'm Madonna!"

* ''[[Gai-Gin]]'' describes Japanese seafood as smelling "like a sperm whale just vomited" and "like a shark's vagina".

* Dmitri in ''[[Spacetrawler]]'' claims that his coffee tastes like asteroid. Justified as it is actually synthesized from space debris.

* [[Problem Sleuth|It has a funny taste. You can't put your finger on it, but if you had to describe it you would say it has the flavor of INTENSE PAIN.]]

* [http://www.missmab.com/Comics/Vol_1064.php Litteraly] used in ''[[Dan and Mab's Furry Adventures]]''.

 

* A comment regarding that reading the recaps of a particular recapper at the website [[Television Without Pity]] was "like drinking gasoline," prompted one of the owners of the website to comment "...stop drinking gasoline…the hell?"

* ''The [[Binder of Shame]]'': The appropriately-nicknamed El Disgusto "passed out while cooking and got kind of saturated", resulting in a smell which was described by Johnny Tangent as reminding him of "a fire in a restaurant or clowns crying or something".

* In the [[Zero Punctuation]] review of the ''[[Bionic Commando]]'' reboot Yahtzee compares the taste of Pepsi to the taste of "someone wringing out his old gymsocks into my mouth."

* In ''[[Freeman's Mind]]'', Gordon says bullsquid snot "tastes like dead caterpillars." Similarly, based on the smell after [[Kill It with Fire|roasting the tentacles]] in Blast Pit, he says he's pretty sure it tastes [[Averted Trope|nothing]] [[Tastes Like Chicken|like chicken]]. He surmises it would instead taste like grasshoppers, admitting he's never tried them.

 

== Western Animation ==

** Once, when the kids from the Model UN were stuck on that island, Ralph tried to eat some wild berries. He responds with "It tastes like ''burning''." Happens a lot to the poor kid.

{{quote|'''Hermes:''' It looks like toxic waste. Smells like toxic waste.

'''Fry:''' What's it taste like?

'''Hermes:''' Delicious fig pudding! Ooh, that's good. But a distinct aftertaste of toxic waste. }}

{{quote|''What tastes like purple?''}}

* In an episode of ''[[Duckman]]'', the title character tastes a microwave burrito and comments "I think I just bit into a squirrel". His partner Cornfed reads the label and rattles off a long list of ingredients including rat feces and ocelot sphincter. "But no, no squirrel."

* ''[[Pelswick]]'''s critique of his sister's cooking: "Chewy, with an aftertaste like licking a bathtub plug."

{{quote|'''Riley''': "This tastes like tree bark!"

'''Todd''' (reading the label): "Now with 48% more tree bark." }}

{{quote|'''Billy''': "It tastes like my cat."

'''Dwarf''': "They taste like everyone's cat!" }}

* Stewie in ''[[Family Guy]]'': "What's that smell? Smells like sweat, anger, and shame!"

* ''[[The Venture Brothers]]'' - Phantom Limb offers Dr. Girlfriend some Asiago cheese while pompously holding forth on its quality; she grimaces and comments "Tastes like the inside of an old Thermos!"

* A two-part episode of ''[[Invader Zim]]'' is titled "[[Exactly What It Says on the Tin|Gaz, Taster of Pork]]". In it, Gaz gains the powers of the Shadow Hog, making everything taste "like pig".

* A [[Running Gag]] on ''[[Rugrats]]'' (Each one [[It Makes Sense in Context|makes sense in context]]):

"It ''is'' mud." }}

* In one [[Bad Future]] episode of ''[[Conan the Adventurer (animation)|Conan the Adventurer]]'', the titular barbarian hero has to drink an antivenom potion that he disgustedly proclaims to taste like "fermented camel spit". Considering one of the ingredients is venom from the serpent demon-god he's fighting, the taste is probably somewhat justified.

* In an episode of ''[[Robot Chicken]]'', Emperor Palpatine speculates that Darth Vader, after flying around in his TIE fighter for a week, "must smell like feet wrapped in leathery burnt bacon!"

** Another sketch inverted this trope: A mother tells her little girl that Grandma's bones are brittle "like peanut brittle". The girl immediately tries to eat Grandma, assuming Mom was talking about her bones' flavor.

* From the ''[[Regular Show]]'' episode "A Bunch of Baby Ducks":

{{quote|'''Rigby:''' "It tastes like how Muscle Man smells!"}}

* ''[[Spliced]]'': Entrée, who was a giant at the time, says "He tastes like feet" after he attempts to eat Two-legs Joe.

 

== Real Life ==

** There's also flavors such as Perspiration, Fun, Happy, Dirt, Natural Field Turf, Sweet Victory, Sports Cream, Bug Juice, [[Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick|Dave]]...

*** Leading to the inevitable parody [http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday/jones-soda-flavors.php here.]

**** [[Brain Food|Delicious?]]

*** That's Dave as in [[Cheech and Chong|he who is not here, man]]... it's flavored with hemp oil.

* Since [http://www.marmite.com/ Marmite] is made from yeast, and since athlete's foot is a fungal infection, it's ''just'' within credibility for those who dislike Marmite to claim it tastes like unpleasant feet...

*** Bread smells fine. Homemade beer on the other hand, will knock you to your ever lovin' knees.

*** Unless your local homebrewer is putting some weird-ass flavors in there, or has some kind of philosophical issue with proper sanitation, you've been drinking [[A Tankard of Moose Urine|bad beer.]]

* European travel guru Rick Steves reports in his guidebooks that he once went cheese shopping with a Frenchman who "took an orgasmic whiff, and exclaimed, 'Ahh... it smells like zee feet of angels!"

* Limburger cheese almost literally smells like feet. And since taste and smell are highly interrelated...

** The smell is close enough that limburger will attract several kinds of mosquitoes - the species that specialize in feet and ankles.

* Animal feet are edible. [[Foreign Queasine|Chicken feet]] is a common Chinese dim sum dish. When Sonia Sotomayor was nominated for the Supreme Court of the United States, some mention was made in the media that [http://www.ricanrecipes.com/recipes/detail.php?id=67 Puerto Rican-style pigs' feet with chickpeas] was [http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/05/conservative-whispers-to-hill-reporter-concern-about-the-impact-diet-will-have-on-her-jurisprude.php one of her favorite dishes].

* Cool Blue Gatorade. Even the people who make it can only describe it as "Blue".

** This is true to the point that many people in the US military no longer refer to flavors, simply colors.

* For thousands of years, before the advent of chemical assays, physicians would diagnose certain ailments (such as diabetes mellitis) by smelling and tasting a patient's sweat, spittle, and/or urine. If a doctor back then were to complain that his beer tastes like pee, he could've meant it literally.

** ''Cho Doufu'', or "stinky tofu" is made by fermenting tofu.

* Sea urchin sashimi (''uni'') has been described as tasting a little like rockpools, presumably in a rotting seaweed-and-brine way.

** Also, the weakest ''baijiu'' is allowed to be is 40% ABV, or 80 proof (standard proof for most Western liquor); ''maotai'' (one of the more renowned forms) often clocks in at 53% (106 proof). Many other forms are 60% (120 proof), and a few forms, such as ''fenjiu'' and ''gaolangjiu''<ref>If you've seen [[Zhang Yimou]]'s first film, ''[[Red Sorghum]]'', this is what they're making at that distillery</ref> can get up to [[Gargle Blaster|63% or 65% (126-170 proof)]], at which point they are literally flammable. When you remember that we actually do use alcohol for fuel... And at banquets, [[Red China|Communist Party]] officials are likely to take several drinks of ''baijiu'', sometimes taken as shots (particularly if a toast is proposed). Suffice it to say that when it comes to drinking, the Chinese do not play games.

* Came up at [http://notalwaysright.com/mmm-moisturizer/856 this entry] of ''[[(The Customer is) Not Always Right]]''.

* In several places on this site, the rather vocal Hatedom of Foster's beer has described it as the urine of various different animals, complete with local variations. The Australians consider it cat piss, while the British think it's horse piss.

** Even Americans familiar with other beers liken it to tasting like piss (We need our own version, though. Dog piss?)

* A less specific real-life example. How many times haven't you heard someone describing something as "tasting like crap"? Most people have probably used a comparison like that themselves at some point.

* Uncoated pills often have a (usually faint) smell that is very similar to wet paper towels; considering the correlation of smell to taste, it's not unusual for someone to claim the pills taste like wet paper towels, especially since they taste stronger than they smell.

{{quote|'''Mallozzi''': What flavor did you try?

'''Binder''': Shoe.}}

 

{{reflist}}

[[Category:Tastes Like an Index]]

[[Category:Dialogue]]

[[Category:Disgust Tropes]]

[[Category:Food Tropes]]