Lifetime Movie of the Week/Quotes

Mary Jo Pehl: I saw this same scene in a Lifetime movie about a woman trying to escape an abusive relationship.
Bill Corbet: Which movie was that?

Mary Jo Pehl: All of them, actually.

—Riff Trax: X Files: Fight the Future

Roger: Oh, my God, look what's on Lifetime! Daphne Zuniga in Spooning with Anger.
Steve: So?
Roger: So?! That's our favorite spousal abuse movie of all time. We gave it even higher marks than Valerie Bertinelli's classic, Please, Kevin. Not in the Face.
TV: "I'm sorry dinner was late! I love you so much!"

Roger: Why do they stay, Steve? Why do they stay?

—American Dad, A.T. The Abusive Terrestrial

Actress: Doctor, you said you were going to cure my cancer, but all you did was rape me. I'm starting to think I don't have cancer at all.
Actor: Well, you're right. About the rape part. But you really do have cancer.

Announcer: Valerie Bertinelli in, Men Are Horrible And Will Hurt You Because This Is Lifetime.

—Family Guy