Night Watch (Discworld)/Quotes

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"When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend."

He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armour. It was gilt by association.

"Don't put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That's why they're called revolutions. People die, and nothing changes."

His movements could be called cat-like, except that he did not stop to spray urine up against things.

"Do you mean that most of them will be human, or that each individual will be mostly human?"

His glare ran from face to face, causing most of the squad to do an immediate impression of the Floorboard and Ceiling Inspectors Synchronized Observation Team.

We who think we are about to die will laugh at anything.

Ninety per cent of most magic merely consists of knowing one extra fact.

"And for close-up fighting, as your senior sergeant I explicitly forbid you to investigate the range of coshes, blackjacks and brass knuckles sold by Mrs Goodbody at No. 8 Easy Street, at a range of prices and sizes to suit all pockets, and should any of you approach me privately I absolutely will not demonstrate a variety of specialist blows suitable for these useful yet tricky instruments."

As soon as you saw people as things to be measured, they didn't measure up.

"Good grief, you don't just pile stuff up, for gods' sake! A barricade is something you construct! "

"What good would a statue be? It'd just inspire new fools to believe they're going to be heroes. They wouldn't want that. Just let them be. For ever."

Who really knew what evil lurked in the heart of men? Me. Who knew what sane men were capable of? Still me, I'm afraid. Vimes glanced at the door of the last room. No, he wasn't going in there again. No wonder it stank in there. You can't hear me, can you? Oh. I thought you might, said Death, and went back to waiting.

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