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Better Than It Sounds/Tabletop Games: Difference between revisions
Better Than It Sounds/Tabletop Games (view source)
Revision as of 10:56, 28 December 2014
, 9 years agoupdate links
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* {{spoiler|''Battletech''}}: Samurai fight Knights, in giant robots. In space.
* {{spoiler|''[[Bliss Stage]]''}}: All the adults in the world [[Lotus Eater Machine|fall asleep]], leaving kids and teenagers to pilot [[Humongous Mecha]] [[The Power of Love|powered by romance]] [[Deus Sex Machina|and sex]].
* {{spoiler|''Burn In Hell''}}: You're a demon prince of Hell seeking out like-tempered sinners so you can gain prestige by burning the 'best' evil bastards in special circles of hell. Trade other souls for fun and profit. Oh, and for some reason, burning a soul cools hell down until it freezes over, for some reason.
* {{spoiler|''[[Call of Cthulhu (tabletop game)]]''}}: You play ordinary people fighting evil cults and horrors from beyond time. It goes on until you die or go mad from the things you've seen. So, an hour. Tops.
** {{spoiler|Call of Cthulhu: Delta Green}} Members of a disgraced government agency fight monsters. If they're very lucky, they don't lose outright.
* {{spoiler|''Carcasonne''}}: Build cities, roads, churches and farms in the French countryside using cardboard tiles and little wooden people.
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* {{spoiler|[[Don't Rest Your Head]]}}: Mind bogglingly frightening adventures in a world that takes all the [[Nightmare Fuel]] of [[The Phantom Tollbooth]] and kicks it up a notch [[Nightmare Fuel|(Bam!)]] Needle headed dogs will sew your shadow to the floor.
** Did we mention you get powers from being crazy that make you more crazy?
* {{spoiler|[[Dungeons and Dragons]]}}: A game of let's pretend where you kill tribes of [[
** {{spoiler|d20 Modern}}: The above {{smallcaps|[[Recycled in Space|in the modern day!]]}}
** {{spoiler|d20 ''[[Star Wars]]''}}: The above {{smallcaps|[[Recycled in Space|a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away!]]}}
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** {{spoiler|''Jade Claw''}}: ''[[Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon]]'' with actual tigers and dragons.
* ''{{spoiler|Kill Doctor Lucky}}'': Everyone is trying to kill a millionaire who is completely bound to his routine.
** ''{{spoiler|Save Doctor Lucky}}'': Everyone is trying to ''save'' a millionaire who is completely bound to his routine.
* ''{{spoiler|Kingmaker}}'': Use your randomly-assigned military forces to attempt to seize the British crown, circa 1483. Occasionally all your hard efforts and thoughtful planning will be wiped out by plague, hurricanes, or Scotsmen.
* ''{{spoiler|Kingsblood}}'' Incest: The Card Game.
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* {{spoiler|[[Ninja Burger]]}}: Deliver enough fast food in 30 minutes or less to Roswell or Air Force One (in flight), and you may live the dream of becoming Branch Manager of a fast food empire. Fail, and it's time to apologize to your ancestors in person.
* {{spoiler|[[Nobilis]]}}: Starting characters are usually capable of destroying the sun. A trivial spell that every PC knows and is able to cast will make you immune to nuclear weaponry for a while. You spend a lot of time tending your flower garden and worrying that someone will find out about your latest crush.
** Deputy gods go on wacky adventures while trying to save the world from pretty boys who are trying to destroy it with flowers and morality plays. Hell is on the good guys' side, and your boss killed at least a hundred people to make a convenient place to stash his body while he/she runs off to fight in the spirit world.
* {{spoiler|Once Upon a Time}}: People co-write a story. They each have a different ending in mind.
* {{spoiler|Pack & Stack}}: Try to find a truck that will fit all your stuff, and grab it before somebody else does.
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** A mad supercomputer rules a post-apocalyptic underground city with an iron fist, executing people for the slightest infringement of its ever-changing rules, and sending hapless teams of Troubleshooters on missions made all but impossible due to bureaucratic bungling, equipment failure and/or team infighting. Secret societies and unhinged super-powered mutants are everywhere. Oh, and this is all played for laughs.
** Alternately: That information is above your clearance level, Citizen.
* {{spoiler|[[Pathfinder]]}}: [[They Changed It, Now It Sucks]] [[X Meets Y|meets]] [[Darker and Edgier]]: the RPG.
* {{spoiler|Power Grid}}: Be the first to dominate the electric power market, one city at a time.
* {{spoiler|Puerto Rico}}: Build an island colony using cardboard and little wooden disks.
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** Alternatively: {{spoiler|''[[Real Life]]''}} The LARP version of ''[[The Sims]]''. (Possibly with less focus on [[Video Game Cruelty Potential|potential for cruelty]], it's hard to tell.)
* {{spoiler|''The Red Dragon Inn''}}: Refugees from a dungeon crawl gamble, get drunk, and beat each other up.
* {{spoiler|''Revolution''}}: Use blackmail, bribery, and violence to place little cubes in the landmarks of a nameless eighteenth-century city.
* {{spoiler|''[[Rifts]]''}}: An untold number of years in the future, the [[Ley Line|Ley Lines]] have turned Earth into something out of the weirdest fantasy novel ever written. Creatures are still falling into the world from other dimensions through holes in reality. People in massive armored suits walk alongside magicians. Chicago is the capital of [[The Empire]], and the empire uses mutant humanoid dogs to sniff out psychics and nonhumans. Meanwhile, Toronto is the centerpiece of a possible [[The Alliance|Alliance]] of good guys, human and fantasy races alike who could resist.
* {{spoiler|''[[Risk]]''}}: [[Chronic Backstabbing Disorder|Chronic backstabbers]] roll dice to see who controls the world.
** {{spoiler|''Risk 2210 A.D.''}}: As above, but with nukes that are inexplicably incapable of being aimed properly.
* {{spoiler|''[[Scion]]''}}: Deadbeat parents expect their kids to fix their messes. The entire planet hates both groups. Literally.
* {{spoiler|[[Settlers of Catan]]}}: Battle it out for who can control the most of a small island with a really weird, hexagon-based geography. Someone will more than likely get [[Double Entendre|wood for sheep]] during the proceedings.
* '' {{spoiler|[[Shadowrun]]}}'': In the future, magic is real, shamanism is real, virtual reality is real enough to kill you even though you can change the interface, and almost everything that can be corrupt is.
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** {{spoiler|''[[Geist: The Sin Eaters]]''}}: You're [[Michael J. Fox]] in ''[[The Frighteners]]'', only you have [[Beetlejuice|Betelgeuse]] rattling around in the back of your head, [[Necromancer|necromancy]] powers, and some folks in Tartarus who are ''very'' angry at you.
** {{spoiler|''[[Demon: The Fallen]]'' }}: Parasites from [[Hell]] latch onto dying people to fight against similar parasites latched onto inanimate objects. They have less than a decade before [[The End of the World as We Know It]] strikes.
** {{spoiler|''[[Wraith: The Oblivion]]''}}: You're dead, then you awaken in a nightmare that would make [[H. R. Giger]] stain his drawers, and then it gets much, much worse. Eventually the players decide to play a more cheerful game like ''[[Call of Cthulhu (tabletop game)]]''.
** {{spoiler|''[[Old World of Darkness]]''}}: The two parts dealing with the death of hope and human potential are widely considered the ''happiest'' of the lot.
*** Or: A supposedly dark and brooding game where one of the darkest lines is notable for having childish artwork.
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