The Longest Day/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Crowning Moment of Funny
    • An overweight Wehrmacht sergeant (Gert Fröbe) delivering coffee to the bunkers sees the huge allied invasion fleet steaming off the coast of Normandy just before the bombardment opens up.
    • Capt. Colin Maud (Kenneth More): "Now move along! The sooner you get off this beach, the sooner the Germans will stop this blasted shelling! It's very bad for the dog!"
    • [a Bren-Carrier is having engine trouble] "My old grandmother used to say, 'Anything mechanical, give it a good bash.'" [whacks vehicle with shillelagh - engine starts, much to everyone's surprise]
    • "If you ask me, Flanagan, there's a lot of very peculiar blokes on this beach."
      • "Velkum! Velkum to yurrall!"
    • A group of lost paratroopers and a German patrol run into each other in the dark and neither realizes they've met the enemy. Both groups walk past each other without concern except for the paratrooper at the end of the column who goes "Wait a second..."
      • Actually, these two groups knew too well their respective counterparts were enemies. But they noticed too late, literally when they were beside each other. So they do the wisest thing anybody can do in this situation: to walk on and pretend nothing happened.
    • "Those 5000 ships you say the Allies haven't got? WELL THEY'VE GOT THEM!"
    • Col. Josef 'Pips' Priller (to his commanding officer): "You were a lousy pilot when we flew into Russia. Now you're flying a desk and you're still a lousy pilot!"
    • Everything out of Sean Connery's mouth. "The evil of it all, trying to drown a man before he's had a chance to fight!"
    • Adolf Hitler and his top brass carry the Idiot Ball.