"The Reason You Suck" Speech: Difference between revisions

{{examples}}

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Anime and Manga|Anime and Manga]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Comic Books|Comic Books]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Fanfic|Fanfic]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Film|Film]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Literature|Literature]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Live Action TV|Live Action TV]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Music|Music]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Video Games|Video Games]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Web Comics|Webcomics]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Western Animation|Western Animation]]

* [["The Reason You Suck" Speech/Real Life|Real Life]]

== Reality TV ==

* In the first season of ''[[Survivor (TV series)|Survivor]]'', fourth-place finisher Susan Hawk opts to use her time allotted to ask the final two ([[Magnificent Bastard|Richard Hatch]] and [[Plucky Girl|Kelly Wigglesworth]]) a question to instead deliver one to both but ''especially'' Kelly, who Sue had intended to take to the final two of the competition and instead both defected from their overall alliance but cast the deciding vote to get rid of Sue instead of Richard.

{{quote|"Kelly, the Rafting Persona Queen... you did get stomped on on national TV by a city boy who never swam, let alone been in the woods or jungle or rowed a boat in his life. You sucked on that game. Anyways, I was your friend at the beginning of this, really thinking that you were a true friend. I was willing to be sitting there and putting you next to me... at that time you were sweeter than me, I'm not a very... openly nice person. I'm just frank, forward, and tell you the way it is. To have you sit there next to me, and have me lose 900,000 dollars just to stomp on somebody like [Richard]. But as the game went along and the two tribes merged you lied to me, which showed me the true person that you are; you're very two-faced and manipulative to get where you're at anywhere in life, that's why you fail all the time. ... but Kelly, go back to a couple of times Jeff [Probst, the host] said 'what goes around comes around?' It's here. You will not get my vote, my vote will go to Richard, and I hope that is the one vote that makes you lose the money. If not, so be it, I'll shake your hand and go on from here. But if I were ever [to] pass you along in life again and you were laying there, dying of thirst, I would not give you a drink of water. I would let the vultures take you and do whatever they want with ya. With no ill-regrets. I plead to the jury tonight to think a little about the island that we have been on. This island is pretty much full of only two things; snakes and rats. And in the end of Mother Nature, we have Richard the snake, who knowingly went after prey, and Kelly who turned into the rat that ran around as the rats do on this island, trying to run from the snake. I feel it that we owe it to the island spirits that we have learned to come to know to let it be in the end as Mother Nature intended it to be, for the snake to eat the rat."}}

** Eighteen seasons later, twelfth-place finisher Erik Cardona uses his time allotted to deliver one that casts an [[Alternate Character Interpretation]] on the Final Three of ''Samoa'': [[Standardized Leader|Mick]], [[Entitled Bastard|Russell]], and [[Guile Heroine|Natalie]]:

{{quote|"Mick: Day One, they put a leadership necklace around your neck. I go 39 days, struggling to find a reason that you deserve that title. You did nothing: you did nothing with your team, you did nothing to encourage them. Nobody on that team had any guts; ''you're'' responsible for that. Russell: this hurts me. We had '''nothing''' in common... You played an unethical game, ''admittedly'' played an unethical game. The crazy thing about it is you're sittin' there; I'm standing here. Did you get to the right place by behaving the wrong way? I've never been in a situation [in] my entire life where that was the case, but you sit there proud of it! Natalie: people will call you weak, people will say that you are undeserving... but you know what? Why are those characteristics any less 'admirable' [than] lying, cheating, and stealing? Why does [Russell] get a free pass but your 'wrong' way of playing is admonished? If there's one thing that I learned in this game, it's that ''(to the jury)'' '''perception is not reality'''! Reality is reality, and ''(to Natalie)'' you are sitting there, and that makes you just as dangerous as any one of those guys there. You would say that you are least deserving of the title of [[Sole Survivor]], but maybe (just maybe) in an environment filled with arrogance [and] delusional entitlement, maybe the person who thinks she's least deserving is probably the most."}}

** In ''All-Stars'', ninth-placer Lex van den Berghe delivers one to finalists [[The Chessmaster|Rob]] and [[Shorttank|Amber]] that's littered with [[Moral Myopia]], since he's berating them for making very similar moves that he made prior to being voted out:

{{quote|"It's just a game. That's something we've probably all said a thousand times while we were out here. And I'm sure that for both of you, it was an excuse that helped wash away the guilt as you played the game the way that you played it. You know what? That phrase, 'it's just a game'? It's a big lie. It's not just a game. For all of us out here, for all of you, it's life. And the line between game and life is not cut and dried. Life blurs into the game constantly. This game exposes who we are as people to the core. It's like truth serum. And I think the way you play this game is representative of the kind of person you are. The hardest lesson I learned out here was about friendship and betrayal. And I think the true measure of a man is what kind of friend he is. What kind of a friend are you, Rob? What kind of a friend were you to me? You asked me to do you a favor. Bro to bro. Friend to friend. And I did the only thing I could do, and that was to answer the call of a friend in need. You repaid that by putting a knife in my back. As far as this game's concerned, I lost, and you both beat me. No sour grapes, no bitterness. With all sincerity, I congratulate both of you for making it to the final two. But as I see it, as good as your game was, you sold out your values, you sold out your character, and you sold out your friends for a stack of greenbacks. I hope it was worth it, because that money will never be enough to buy it all back." }}

* On the UK version of ''[[The Apprentice (TV series)|The Apprentice]]'':

** Katie Hopkins delivered a [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uYqqeeqYzQ particularly memorable one] to Adam Hosker in Series 3.

{{quote|"I could not have put more effort into yesterday. I fragged myself to the bone yesterday to try and make this thing work. Your reasons for bringing me in here just do not stack up. One, on a personal level, and two, on a business level. Sir Alan said he does not know about my personal stuff. He knows about it because you talked about it, because Kristina talked about it. Fine, been that, but if you want to go personal, I'll go personal. I very much strongly advise you not to take down the personal route. At a business level, you have one speed setting, and that speed setting is slow, slow, slow! Someone put the wrong speed dial in when they created you, sweetie, which is why when the phone rings, I always drop. Because I know that phone call will take forever to hear something either I know, or I can get done quicker myself. So you know what? You're just barking up the wrong tree!"}}

** Karren Brady delivered one to the losing team in the sixth series. The team were arguing amongst themselves in the boardroom, it grew heated, and after Lord Sugar called them 'a bunch of bloody amateurs', Karren stepped in.

{{quote|"You are representing businesswomen today, one of which I am. And I have to say, it is outrageous the way you're behaving. 75% of my management team are women, and I've never come across anything like this. And I think you have to remember who you're representing in this process. Young women out there who want to have an opportunity to do this - you should be an example to them."}}

** Claude Littner's interview technique pretty much IS this trope. His first comment when he was a member of the panel on "You're Fired" carried on the trend:

{{quote|"Well, first of all, everything was wrong. The volume was wrong, the margins were wrong, the techniques of selling were wrong. I struggle to find anything that you did right, really. But it wasn't just you -- I think it was everybody in the team who just failed to perform."}}

== Stand Up Comedy ==

* [[Forgotten Realms|Magic of Faerun]] has one given by Khelben Blackstaff to an intruder he's about to kill as its intro.

{{quote|'''Katharina:'''Such duty as the subject owes the prince

* ''[[Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog]]'' has [[Smug Super|Captain Hammer]] deliver one disguised as a [[Rousing Speech]] with the song "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yGeroywBuo&NR=1 Everyone's A Hero]". Pretty much everyone in the audience is fooled save for [[The Messiah|Penny]], who openly looks shocked at the context of the song.<ref>And said shock may or may not have been based off of one line: "Yeah, we totally had sex."</ref>

{{quote|I’m poverty’s new sheriff

And I’m bashing in the slums

A hero doesn’t care

If you’re a bunch of scary alcoholic bums! Everybody! }}