MST3K Mantra/Quotes

Calm down, it's only wrestling.

—Cyrus, ECW

If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
if you pardon, we will mend:
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.

—Puck, last lines of A Midsummer Night's Dream

Final words, the Indiana Jones movies are all entitled to some dumb moments. They recapture the spirit of the old adventure films that came out during The Great Depression and World War II. Audiences were looking to escape the real world and forget about their troubles. And that's what movies are all about: entertainment. But today, audiences are far more critical, have less imagination, and aren't as willing to suspend their disbelief-and that, is the death of cinema. So I hope there's somebody out there who still embraces that old time B-movie feel, and that filmmakers aren't so discouraged to try and recapture the spirit of this cinematic pastime-long live the Saturday matinee!

—James Rolfe, Cinemassacre's "Top 10 Dumbest Indiana Jones Moments"

I guess you have to fill in the rest of the holes yourself

—Caveman, Holes

Take it easy, kid. It's only a movie.

—Ham Salad, Hardware Wars

If you're wondering how [Joel/Mike] eats and breathes
And other science facts, (la la la)
Just repeat to yourself, "It's just a show,
I should really just relax."

—From the Trope Namer

So a recent strip involving Davan explaining how condoms work to my alternate persona with a banana upset some readers... because it was "unrealistic" for a cat to use a condom. Seriously? This comic involves a jelly cat, subterranean alligators and a core cast that should have been arrested several times over for assault and THAT'S bothering people? Of course that's not realistic! This is a comic.

—Choo-Choo Bear II , Something*Positive

If you need the security a strong continuity provides, you may not want to seek psychological security in Star Wars, Star Trek, or any other science fiction series (or computer game continuity). There's holes, gaps, and other problems - my suggestion to you would be to just try to relax a little and enjoy the escapism. When escapism becomes work, an obssession [sic], or is just stressing you out in general, then it's not doing its job and you need to take a step back and take a breather.

—Chris Avellone

Austin Powers: Wait a tick. Basil, if I travel back to 1969 and I was frozen in 1967, presumably, I could go back and visit my frozen self. But, if I'm still frozen in 1967, how could I have been unthawed in the '90s and traveled back to - oh, no, I've gone cross-eyed.
Basil Exposition: I suggest you don't worry about those things and just enjoy yourself. That goes for you all, too.

—Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me

"You know, if you're going to let every little thing bother you, it's going to be a very long night!

—Prince Naveen, The Princess and the Frog