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Stop Helping Me!: Difference between revisions
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{{examples}}
== New Media ==
* Any internet search engine that tries to predict what you're going to type before you type it by offering up a list of suggestions, especially if that list covers up or moves the "search" button so that you try to click on "search" and end up hitting the suggestion instead, as seen [http://i52.tinypic.com/eajfvb.jpg here]. Especially when you copy something, paste it into the search engine, and go to click "search."▼
** [[Google]] is always VERY helpful, as seen [http://i55.tinypic.com/v49sgx.jpg here]. You type something in, and it searches for something '''else''' under the assumption that you're too stupid to type in what you want.▼
*** Not to mention the highly distracting "instant search" which looks for things as you type them, and often searches for all the wrong things until you're done typing completely. But for every letter you type, it seems to find something drastically different, combined with the previously-mentioned "covering of the Search button". To use Google with instant search on, I have to look at the keyboard as I type, because looking at the screen messes with my mind. Luckily, this can easily be turned off.▼
* [[YouTube]] now offers helpful suggestions in case you spell something correctly, as seen [http://i52.tinypic.com/1z6efl5.jpg here].▼
** Which became especially stupid when searching for [[The Idolmaster|The iDOLM@STER]] when it would replace the a with @ and then FAIL TO FIND ANYTHING because it couldn't recognize the @ symbol.▼
* Yahoo Answers seems to panic if one uses proper punctuation, as seen [http://i55.tinypic.com/12557ki.jpg here].▼
* The imageboard ''4chan'' briefly gained a Clippy-inspired "helper" one April first. Asking Sticky the 4chan Assistant for help with "trolling" emptied your post and name fields, and replaced it all with the words "DICK BUTT".▼
* [[Bonzi Buddy]].▼
* Rogue security programs. They're not even really trying to help you (quite the opposite, actually), but that's how they try to come off.▼
* In the ''[[The Terminator|T2 3-D: Battle Across Time]]'' show at Universal Studios, this is The Terminator's response to John Connor's repeatedly telling him how close the baddie was.▼
== Real Life ==
=== Software ===
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* Automatic spelling correction—it often a) corrects a word that isn't wrong, or b) picks the wrong correction. Bonus points for correcting into the wrong language, e.g. a name of an English book in a bulk of Czech text. (Infamously, the Czech edition of one version of MS Word corrected "n" [as a single-letter word] to "a". Woe to you if you want to use the letter N as an abbreviation or a symbol for something.)
** The English version also "corrects" lower case i to upper case I.
▲* Any internet search engine that tries to predict what you're going to type before you type it by offering up a list of suggestions, especially if that list covers up or moves the "search" button so that you try to click on "search" and end up hitting the suggestion instead, as seen [http://i52.tinypic.com/eajfvb.jpg here]. Especially when you copy something, paste it into the search engine, and go to click "search."
▲** [[Google]] is always VERY helpful, as seen [http://i55.tinypic.com/v49sgx.jpg here]. You type something in, and it searches for something '''else''' under the assumption that you're too stupid to type in what you want.
▲*** Not to mention the highly distracting "instant search" which looks for things as you type them, and often searches for all the wrong things until you're done typing completely. But for every letter you type, it seems to find something drastically different, combined with the previously-mentioned "covering of the Search button". To use Google with instant search on, I have to look at the keyboard as I type, because looking at the screen messes with my mind. Luckily, this can easily be turned off.
▲* [[YouTube]] now offers helpful suggestions in case you spell something correctly, as seen [http://i52.tinypic.com/1z6efl5.jpg here].
▲** Which became especially stupid when searching for [[The Idolmaster|The iDOLM@STER]] when it would replace the a with @ and then FAIL TO FIND ANYTHING because it couldn't recognize the @ symbol.
▲* Yahoo Answers seems to panic if one uses proper punctuation, as seen [http://i55.tinypic.com/12557ki.jpg here].
▲* The imageboard ''4chan'' briefly gained a Clippy-inspired "helper" one April first. Asking Sticky the 4chan Assistant for help with "trolling" emptied your post and name fields, and replaced it all with the words "DICK BUTT".
▲* [[Bonzi Buddy]].
▲* Rogue security programs. They're not even really trying to help you (quite the opposite, actually), but that's how they try to come off.
===
▲* In the ''[[The Terminator|T2 3-D: Battle Across Time]]'' show at Universal Studios, this is The Terminator's response to John Connor's repeatedly telling him how close the baddie was.
▲== Real Life ==
* Anyone who has ever had a hypochondriac for a friend has probably felt this way at some point.
* Many an EMT or firefighter has at least thought this when someone untrained, unfortunately frequently a cop, attempts to "help". No, grabbing the suspected spinal injury victim by the arm and trying to pull him to his feet to move him isn't optimal, thank you.
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