Monstrous Regiment/Quotes
Jackrum: "Upon my oath, I am not a violent[1] man." |
Let’s see, now ... arms out from the body as though holding a couple of bags of flour ... check. Shoulders swaying as though she was elbowing her way through a crowd ... check. Hands slightly bunched and making rhythmical circling motions as though turning two independent handles attached to the waist ... check. Legs moving forward loosely and apelike ... check ... |
The place was one of those nowhere villages that existed only in order to avoid the embarrassment of having large empty spaces on the map. |
Vimes: "What’s abominable about the colour blue? It’s just a colour! The sky is blue!" |
"Whoms" were likely to be far more trouble than your common everyday "who". |
Maladicta: “And one more thought for you, if you’ve got room. I’ve only taken a pledge not to drink human blood. It doesn’t mean I can’t kick you in the fork so hard you suddenly go deaf.” |
It was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners. |
The four lesser apocalyptical horsemen of Panic, Bewilderment, Ignorance, and Shouting took control of the room. |
Polly had been soldiering for only a couple of days, but already an instinct had developed. In summary, it was this: lie to officers. |
It took a special kind of man, she reflected, to cut his sword hand with his own sword. |
If you couldn’t trust the government, who could you trust? |
A woman always has half an onion left over, no matter what the size of the onion, the dish, or the woman. |
There was this about vampires; they could never look scruffy. Instead, they were…what was the word… dishabille. It meant untidy, but with bags and bags of style. |
Blouse: “You can’t torture an unarmed man!” |
“How many fingers am I holding up?” |
“Plogviehze!” It meant “The Sun Has Risen! Let’s Make War!” You needed a special kind of history to get all that in one word. |
Igorina: “But…our countrywomen? Washing clothes for the enemy?” |
"Wheresoever men are gathered together, someone will find something to ferment in a rubber boot, distill in an old kettle, and flog to his mates. Made from rats, by the smell of it. Ferments well, does your average rat. Fancy a taste?” |
Blouse: “You took a terrible risk. A battlefield is no place for women.” |
Polly: “The last man out stuck his thumb up and winked. Did you notice him? He wasn’t even wearing an officer’s uniform.” |
It is always upsetting to find that the enemy is as bright as you. |
Vimes: “Sam Vimes. Special envoy, which is kind of like an ambassador but without the little gold chocolates.” |
Anyway, it was the stuff of legends, where accuracy is not required as a major ingredient. |
- Back to Monstrous Regiment
- ↑ /shouty/bluffing/gentleman/lying/disobeying orders/gossiping/swearing