Static Shock/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Static Shock had a lot of great moments, but there were several in "Future Shock". Right when Static is teleported to the future, he ends up in the Batcave and is attacked by Terry.

Static: Batman's not going to be happy about how you're treating his guests.
Terry: First off, we don't have guests here. Second off, I'm Batman.
Static: Yeah, and I'm Beyonce.
Bruce: *later walks in* What's going on here?!
Terry: He says his name is Beyonce.

    • Another occurs when Static and Gear are trying to safely land a falling plane:

Gear: (over the Shock Vox) I'm going to try to land on Woodward Avenue.
Static: There are cars down there!
Gear: I know... this thing got a horn?

      • Then, after they land the plane, hitting a car in the process:

Static: Isn't that your dad's car?
Gear: Aaaah!
Static: Just kidding.

  • NOOOO! NO! NO, I CAN-CAN-CAN-CANNAN-CANNOT BE-BE-BE-BEATEN! I AM BRAAAAAINIAC! BRAI-BRAI-BRAI-BRAI-BRAI-BRAINI-BRAINIAC! BRAI-BRAI-BRAI-BRAI-BRAINI-BRAINIAC! ONE-ONE-ONE-ONE-ONE DAY I-I WILL BE-BE-BE BACK BE BACK BE BACK AND AND AND AND AND I WILL... LAAAAY THE FUNK DOWN!
  • "Out of Africa" featuring the immortal "I too have often wondered about the stripes".
    • The scenes in his two appearances where the African hero Anansi is mistaken for another spider-based superhero... though he does seem pretty good-natured about it.

Virgil: Hit him with a web blast! (doing the web-ball gesture)
Anansi: I'm not that kind of spider.

      • And the gag continues in "Out of Africa":

Gear: Whoa! So, you're the spider guy. I expected you to swing in on a web.
Anansi: I get that a lot.

  • Virgil has confided in Richie about a certain secret—not his Secret Identity, just the fact that A. J. McLean is in town. Richie blabs to Daisy at school, who posts it on the school website. Virgil, at home, goes to log onto the school website, and Richie—whom we have last seen at school, being offered a cheeseburger -- explodes through Virgil's bedroom door, right as Virgil turns on his computer. Watch it here (key scene starts at 2:08).
  • Virgil has just awakened in the Batcave where Alfred is tending to his wounds.

Virgil: Who're you?
Alfred: Batman.
Virgil: I don't think so.
Alfred: Just once I'd like someone to believe that.

  • From 'She-bang', Hotstreak's overreaction to watching a bad movie includes setting fire to the cinema

Hotstreak: It's wrong, it's all wrong! The movie stinks! I give it two thumbs down!
Static:You can't go wrecking other people's property just because you ain't feeling the movie.
Hotstreak: Have you seen it? Somebody has got to send a message!

Gear: Ooh, ooh, ooh! Can I come too?
Hawkgirl: This isn't a field trip.

Gear: Please ohh please! You can stuff me in the stowaway bin, and when I get up there, I'll stand in the corner. You can choose which one!

--

Hawkgirl: Hey! Remember your promise about staying in the corner!

Gear: B-but-!

Hawkgirl: In. The. Corner.

Gear: Aww..

  • Richie(Recently gifted with Super Intelligence) being challenged to solve a ridiculously hard equation.

Richie: Four over Pi.
Teacher: Maybe if you payed more attention...what did you just say?
Richie: The answer. Four over Pi.

  • From "Toys in the Hood". Superman saves Static and Gear from a giant robot monkey attack, and later Clark Kent interviews Virgil and Richie about it. When Virgil says that Superman might have helped Static a little, Clark Kent responds by asking where Virgil and Richie were when it happened. Virgil and Richie both go into contradictory explanations, with Virgil's ending in "...and that's why you're such a good reporter!", and Richie's involving a dispute over what the definition of "it" is.