Tropes Will Ruin Your Life/Quotes

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"I just want to say to you guys: Get out of my head! Thanks to the amount of time I've spent here, it's been months since I was able to sit down and watch a movie or TV show without knowing by the first commercial break, every major event that was going to happen in the Plot."
Red Shoe
Abandon free time all ye who enter here.
Anonymous

"Do you know the end? Did Mom tell you that Fox is--"

"Oh, shit," Jeremy's father interrupts. "They killed Fox?"

That's the problem with being a writer, Jeremy knows. Even the biggest and most startling twists are rarely twists for you. You know how every story goes.
"Magic for Beginners", by Kelly Link
"It's like 'okay, I'll go to bed after this one', and ten minutes later you have up ten different tabs and are all like 'hurrrneedmoarhurrr'."
A friend of this troper, who got it right on the money


"I need to consume more of your time than this comic alone can do. Here, have a link to TV Tropes. And another one. And another for good measure. Bwahahahahah!"
"Warning: this site is fascinating and will eat hours of your time."
Phil Foglio, Girl Genius, Extra Fun (providing a link in the process)
Fifteen minutes into a TV Tropes voyage I realized my peril and managed to claw free.
Shamus Young

"Have we started linking tropes in conversation now?"

--This Trooper

"Yes."
"Hmmm. Well, I have to say that both sides have a point but oooooh Small Name, Big Ego never seen that one before click click click click click AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH."
judyhazeleyes of fandom_wank demonstrates the usual process

 "WHY DID YOU LINK TO TVTROPES

I FORGOT TO TIE OFF A ROPE AND NOW I'M DROWNING"

 the TVtropes QC page is every single idiotic comment from my forums distilled into one HTML document

Jeph Jacques

  You cannot spell TV Tropes without "rope".

 "No, honest, there's like, a comprehensive list of every single scary thing that ever happened in kids tv."

"Really? What did you say the name of the site was?"

"...I didn't. I can't. I told someone else ages ago. I haven't seen her since."

User:Scarab and a classmate, discussing fear in animated television.

Somewhere on the TV Tropes Wiki is a theory that Bill and Ted are Time Lords, but I'm not going to provide a link because that would involve entering the TV Tropes Wiki, and it might be months before I came out again.
Just tell her parents you weren't watching her because you were editing TV Tropes. They'll understand.
TV Tropes must be the only wiki where I can start off looking at Doctor Who and end up with advice over what gun I should buy.
The main reason to avoid putting something incorrect or unrealistic-looking in a TV show or film is that it disrupts people's suspension of disbelief ... [but] the only people whose ability to suspend their disbelief might suffer are those who work in TV -- and they will have lost that ability long ago. When they watch telly, all they can see is the work that's gone into it and the mistakes. It's like taking an Egyptian slave on a tour of the pyramids -- he doesn't marvel, he just gets sympathy backache.
David Mitchell

If you read TV Tropes

So much that you're addicted

Don't be surprised if you lose your job

And then are soon evicted
10. *BZZRT* WE DON'T *ZAP* ZOMBIES *ZAP* MENTION *BZZRRT* TVTROPES HERE *BZZRT* CAAAEEEEEEEEEKK! *BZZRT* *STATIC* *BUZZ* ore you wil dai.

 I once overheard two botanists tropers arguing over a Damned Thing that had blasphemously sprouted in a college yard. happened on a T.V. show. One claimed that the Damned Thing was a tree Xanatos Gambit and the other claimed that it was a shrub Batman Gambit. They each had good scholarly arguments, and they were still debating when I left them.

The world is forever spawning Damned Things— things that are neither tree Xanatos Gambit nor shrub Batman Gambit, fishBittersweet Ending nor fowl Earn Your Happy Ending, black nor white— and the categorical thinker can only regard the spiky and buzzing world of sensory fact Canon as a profound insult to his card-index system of classifications. Worst of all are the facts which violate "common sense," "Magic A Is Magic A," that dreary bog of sullen prejudice and muddy inertia. The whole history of science TV Tropes is the odyssey of a pixilated card-indexer perpetually sailing between such Damned Things and desperately juggling his classifications to fit them in.
—Hagberd Celiene, of the The Illuminatus Trilogy, on tv tropes

"Go ahead, wreck your life,

That might be good,

Who can say what's wrong or right?

Nobody can."
—"Spiraling Shape," They Might Be Giants
"Now, if you'll excuse This Troper, he'll be on TV Tropes."
StongRadd when he's bored

Audioworm: I wish I wasn't so bored.

Captain Fabulous: www.tvtropes.org. Hope you don't have anything planned...

N Tom 64: I think it's one "prophecy/seeing into the future-type of event" per person.

The Helldragon: Or some Trope like that, I don't know, I don't know. We'll check TV Tropes after this and we'll find out.

N Tom 64: Don't go on there; you'll never leave.

The Helldragon: [Commentary for the movie]...Yeah, TV Tropes. You get on there; prepare to stay awhile.
—From the Hellfire Comms commentary of Aladdin and the King of Thieves here.
A TV Tropes article links here. Kiss your free time goodbye.
A 1d4chan article

"Last thing I remember, I was

Running for the door

I had to find the passage back

To the place I was before

’relax,’ said the night man,

We are programmed to receive.

You can checkout any time you like,

But you can never leave!
—"Hotel California," The Eagles
TV Tropes is a veritable black hole of hyperlinks, each leading further into the center of oblivion. The entire site is made up of a community that spends its life collecting patterns and commonalities between fictional worlds. It applies names to every plot device, every story arc and every cinematic tool ever captured by a camera and then links them to one another. The result is like being in the mind of a paranoid schizophrenic deciphering hidden codes in newspapers. Clicking on one link will ensure that you click on another, and another until you have lost your way back home and forgotten who you are.
There are two things about the book that make it purest evil: the first is that anyone can add to it, so it's always changing and growing larger. The second is that every entry contains several references to other cleverly-named tropes, and touching one of those names sends you to an explanation of that Trope's name, complete with references to other tropes . . . and at some point you look up and see you're eight years older than when you started.
Kingdom of Loathing, "Tome Of Tropes" encounter

Oh dear, you've found TV Tropes. Expect to lose years of your life mindlessly clicking on links. Seriously, what's with that site?

TV Tropes: "OM NOM CAN CONTROLZ INTERNETZ?"
Quotidian Torture, Pharyngula

During Lost, after writing scripts and editing episodes all day, it was nearly impossible for me to come home and watch scripted television without my critical brain kicking in. Instead of being caught up in the narrative, I could see only what was underneath — the blueprints and building materials.

After stumbling on this site I left my room to find I had been declared legally dead.
"Death Note is (at least the first half) a truly excellent story, but when you put it as Tropey Mc Tropeface finds a Droppytrope and Tropey Angel Tropes him into Troping a Trope Trope along with Loli Trope and No Name Trope Trope the Trope, well.. it kind of loses something in the translation, you know?"

Linking to TV Tropes?

Why not just throw the readers into a bottomless pit?

Caution: Entering TV Tropes should be attempted only if you have the proper gear. I suggest tying a strong guide rope to a tree near the entrance and attaching the other end to your waist—bring along a blind man with instructions to remind you after thirty minutes to quit reading and get back to work. Said blind man should be armed with a cudgel to help persuade you to return.
Board Admin of Often Inspired commenting on someone linking to TV Tropes during NaNoWriMo.

Is the snake an example of the "Insurmountable Waist-Height Fence"? *sigh* I've been to Tv Tropes too many times.

NB: If you follow the link to TV Tropes, I am not responsible for the approximate 4.5 hours of productive time you will lose. K?
SB Sarah, review of The Grand Sophy

Aurini: ...Heh, this might be worth a top level post except tvtropes has covered it all already.

Eliezer_Yudkowsky: The most rationalist-relevant TV Tropes would easily be worth a top post or three.

JulianMorrison: You'd lose your whole crop of rationalists. They would never come back out.
  1. Seriously, I can't have a conversation with my housemate any more that doesn't start with "Have you read the TV Tropes page for...".