A Wizard Did It/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


"There are no continuity errors in the Discworld novels. There are, however, alternate pasts."

Sir Terry Pratchett, jokingly invoking the introduction of Time Travel in Thief of Time as the Wizard

"The Sandflow Caves are named because volcanic activity below causes the sand to be constantly shifting, flowing up and down the cave walls. What do you mean, 'volcanic activity wouldn't cause that'? It must be magic, then. Yes. A wizard did it."

The Encyclopedia of MARDEK RPG, Chapter 3

Red Mage: So, you're the one responsible for all the weird, nonsensical stuff that happens in our world, right?
Sarda: Yup!
Thief: Why?
Sarda: I am as old as magic and have ultimate power over creation. Do I need a reason?

Gabe: So I had my main villain, Fell Nefaros, be deborn into an Unliver. And now my players are in revolt! They say the rules don't support reverse necromancy!
Tycho: Enough. You know what you tell 'em? Magic.
Gabe: Sure, but how did he...
Tycho: He's a wizard, and he used magic.
Gabe: I get that, but in the context of...
Tycho: MAGIC!

"This is the beginning of the automatic scrolling area, for no reason. I guess the local wizard was like 'yeah, I haven't done anything unexplainable by now, yep, let's tie up the loose ends...'"

"You really shouldn't make these things in quantities this large. If you end up with more than about 16 million of any given item, you'll lose the excess, which means you'll lose Meat. This is because of... a... wizard. Yeah. A wizard. A wizard who doesn't like numbers larger than 16 million."

Kingdom of Loathing error message

Star Trek #1: [In response to Linkara's gun shooting lasers] But how? You have to explain it!
Linkara: Explain it? It's magic! I don't have to explain it!

Tycho: You told him A Wizard Did It?
Gabe: I don't know! I panicked!
Tycho: Why didn't you just tell him the truth?
Gabe: I DON'T KNOW THE TRUTH!

"It's magic. Possibility seldom factors."

Frink: "Yes, over here, [...] in Episode BF12, you were battling barbarians while riding a winged Appaloosa, yet in the very next scene, my dear, you're clearly atop a winged Arabian! Please do explain it!
Lucy Lawless: Uh, yeah, well, whenever you notice something like that... a wizard did it.
Frink: Yes, alright, yes, in episode AG04-"
Lucy Lawless: Wizard!

The Simpsons, "Treehouse of Horror X"

"There are two kinds of magic in the world: Magic as a force that can grant the wondrous... and then there's narrative magic. The kind where we get the classic phrase: 'It's magic we don't have to explain it'".

"Remember that we're talking about The Force here. At this point, Malak himself could drop out of the sky and I wouldn't bat an eyelash."

Canderous OrdoKnights of the Old Republic

"How did the menly men of Team Fortress 2 appear at a tenth century battlement? Simple. The Soldier angered a magician."

The official Team Fortress 2 blog, "Australian Christmas"

Miss Pauling: First things first. How did Soldier become a public defender?
Spy: It's a long story, but chapter one: His roommate is a magician. Should I continue?
Miss Pauling: You know what? Nevermind.

Team Fortress 2's supplemental comics, "A Smissmas Story"



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