Black Lagoon/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.

  • Balalaika is editing her syndicate's porn videos to save money, and is bored out of her skull. Revy and Rock walk in.

Balalaika: I gotta finish 15 of these today, so I won't be getting out anytime soon. Yup, I should've gotten a part-timer to do it. I'm seriously losing my mind. I have a meeting tonight, too. Some more idiots selling drugs without permission again. What a pain in the balls...
Revy: Hold on a sec! Is she taking it up the ass?!
Balalaika: Sure is.

Revy: Dutch? I know what I want for Christmas.

    • Earlier there was the moment where Garcia says to Revy's face that Roberta is stronger than her. Revy's to laugh her ass off. Through her hysterics, she mocks the notion that Roberta could beat her. (And seeing as the two end up evenly matched, she's partially right.) And the scene randomly cuts to Roberta, as if she knows someone is talking about (and laughing at) her right then.
  • 10th episode. Right before Roberta and Revy's all-out, no holds barred fistfight, Roberta says that Revy's shoelaces are untied. It works.
    • What makes it even better is that Revy initially scoffs. And then looks anyway.
    • Even better is that it's true, her shoelaces actually are untied, in fact they're always untied.
    • Revy and Roberta then proceed to beat the ever-loving crap out of each other, while the rest of the cast take bets on who will win. Being the only one concerned about this, Rock tries to stop their fighting by suggesting they sit down and talk about their problems. Their response is unsurprising:

Revy and Roberta (simultaneously): STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THIS!

Roberta: I have no need for filthy language.

  • In the "Baile de la Muerte" arc of the manga, Rotton spots a possible vantage point in their hunt for Roberta. He then asks "Would it look cool if I made an entrance from there?"
  • In "Greenback Jane", the eponymous Jane calls Eda and Revy "people who grew up watching NYPD Blue", or words to that effect. Revy responds "Would it be so surprising if I told you I watched Oprah?"
  • Every single Omake. From Balalaika being Hansel and Gretel's mom onward, Hilarity Ensues. Special notice should be given to the scary story one, where Rock's story managed to terrify Revy, Balalaika and the twins, to the point where Balalaika won the narration's Scaredy Cat award and was seen in her pajamas demanding that her sergeant escort her to the bathroom.

Hansel: Let's play Unit 731!

Rock: (on loudhailer) Testing, testing...(Feedback Squeal)...ahhh...Good morning to everybody on board the St. Joan. I apologize for the sudden request, but would you please stop your engines right away?


Rock: My own personal opinion is that at this point (sees a pissed-off Revy loading an RPG-7 rocket launcher and begins to talk faster) complying with this request as quickly as possible would definitely be the best course of action!

    • And then, after the first rocket is launched, Revy takes over in characteristic fashion:

Revy: Listen VERY CAREFULLY, you dipshits! My rockets are much faster than any of your lame distress signals! So unless you want to end up a corpse-filled shipwreck, then I suggest you stop moving! YOU GOT IT?!

  • Upon encountering a shy, stuttering cleaning-man of the hotel Balalaika was in, in the second season:

Balalaika: I think that boy's just about reached the peak of his adorableness! <3

  • At one point during the "Goat, Jihad and Rock and Roll" arc, the group flees in a van with the Protectors of the Islamic Front in hot pursuit, and they all get high on cocaine after thinking they were smoking normal cigarettes and the driver starts hallucinating that they're being attacked by Playboy Playmates.
  • Nearly all of Revy and Eda's interaction.
  • And who can forget this little gem after Rock's first Crowning Moment of Awesome?
  • Eda's reaction when Gretel starts throwing money in her face.
  • And what does Revy say when Yukio takes Rock hostage? "Great! Now he's been kidnapped by a schoolgirl!"
  • After the Yakuza arc, Eda asks in no uncertain terms if Revy "did it" with Rock while both of them in Japan. Revy's reaction? A sullen, mumbled "I don't wanna talk about it..." (She did and doesn't want Eda bugging her; tried and failed; or doesn't want to admit that it's been going on for a while. Either way, any kind of answer would ask for merciless teasing.)
  • After completely trashing the Yellow Flag, Fabiola collapses on the bar and says, "Ah, I'm tired. Bartender, gimme a beer."
  • In one instance during the Roberta revenge arc, Rotton intervenes between Fabiola and some FARC soldiers by standing in front of her and giving a long speech about his guns, completely with dramatic wind. The FARC soldiers are so confused that they don't notice Sawyer coming along and cutting them in half, cackling happily, until it's too late.
  • In Chapter 78, Rock, Benny, Jane, and a recently recruited Chinese hacker are sitting in a motel room when Rock suddenly brings up how much the room stinks. Just as Benny starts to explain why, Sawyer barges in, causing Jane to freak out since the former had tried to killed her the last time they met. After Jane calms down, Sawyer starts explaining through Rock that the room had been inhabited by a couple of wannabe crooks until two weeks ago, when they were shot dead in the very same place. By the time she had arrived for clean up, the bodies were in an advanced state of decomposition and were a bit runny; she tells them they had to be carried out in buckets, at which point everyone starts feeling nauseous.
    The worst was yet to come though, as the reason why Sawyer came back was to finish the job: she had yet to remove the mattress which was the cause of the awful smell. Rock comes over to help and as he touches a stain on the mattress, notes that "it has something like oil on it" and wonders what it is. Sawyer then draws a picture of a buttered slice of bread on a grimy window by way of explanation, and then everyone starts to gradually make the horrifying connection: the "bread" is the mattress, and the stains on the mattress are "butter". In other words, what Rock had just touched and what they had been smelling the whole time was melted body fat. Everyone starts vomiting except for Sawyer, who is looking positively delighted at their discomfort.
  • Almost every line out of the high-as-a-kite Irishman in episode 12, including this pair of gems: "I've got to get to Liverpool! Jimmy Hendrix is calling me back! He got my message! He wants me to defeat the Klingons ASAP! C-Captain Picard!" and "My application to the Black Panthers was denied again!?" (In the dub)