Pokémon Quartz/YMMV

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Alternate Character Interpretation: Main Character is trying to escape the Crapsack World and his/her rival is a molesting stalker. (Thanks, Zorak.)
  • Crowning Moment of Awesome: During the Let's Play, Foxy after winning the championship finally gets her katana unstuck and kills her stalker rival.
  • Crowning Moment of Funny:
    • "WE BUCANEERS ARE AS HOME DOGS!"
    • Baro and severs.
    • FUCK YOU! YOU GET AN F!
  • Ensemble Darkhorse: Plug-Oink, due to being the least hideous thing in the game. Also Col. Crazy from Zorak's playthrough.
    • And Swap.Bear, for all the wrong reasons.
    • Murderfish too. Zorak seemed to have a little too much fun riding a giant levitating killer-dragon-fish-thingy around the seas and beating up trainers with it.
    • Not to forget DA KING, defender of royal surpremacy who regularly beats up impostors and won the Coolness contest...it helps that it has one of the better-looking designs.
    • There's also DA KING's right-hand man, Col. Crazy. Foxy even refuses to evolve him.
  • Goddamned Mushrooms: Stulo and its evolution Fungio are very fast (making them hard to escape from), use Mean Look to prevent switching or escape, spam bad status moves, and have Effect Spore, which can cause a physical attacker to get either Sleep, Poison or Paralysis. In fact, the hack shows that they are replacements of Zubat and Golbat, even having the exact same cry.
  • Good Bad Bug: The Sprites for the Legendaries don't disappear when you catch them.
  • Hilarious in Hindsight: Babos is a Memetic Molester that seduces people by screaming "BAAABEEEY!" Sound like anyone?
  • Idiot Plot: The villains are trying to inflate the sun with a broken ghost detector. To power up the Electric Pokemon. Yeah, not the Fire Pokemon or anything.
  • Iron Woobie: During the Let's Play, Foxy contends with a land filled with rapists, idiots who mangle the English language, an over-abundance of flying-types, a villainous team band with the stupidest goal in the history of the Pokemon world, catching a Babos (seriously, Arceus must have been on some major drugs when he created that thing), a creepy molesting stalker, Groudon and Kyogre's deformed cousins, a Pokemon professor who's a huge creep and a Marty Stu, and gym leaders who have an infinite supply of full restores. She also makes ghosts and pirates cry.
  • It's Easy, So It Sucks: You can find Master Balls and Olympus Mons Legendaries everywhere very early in this Hack. Slightly justified, in that the gym leaders are ridiculously overleveled and have what seems like an endless supply of Full Restores.
    • This was in the original beta due to a glitch. The final version pretty much fixes this so that they're rare like they're supposed to be.
  • Marty Stu - "BAAAAAAROOOOOOOOO!!!!!"
    • A later interview reveals that at least part of this was a combination of shitty English and laziness-only one of the many "Baro"s running around was supposed to be the creator. The rest were just named "Baro" because in that part of the world "Baro" is analagous to John in that it's obscenely common.
      • No explanation for "Ba-chan", though.
  • Memetic Molester: Damn near everybody, special mention goes to your rival though.
  • Memetic Mutation: "I am going to suicide!!!!!"
  • Misblamed: If a line looks stupid, it may have come from the original game, if the language is not horrendously mangled.
  • Narm: Some of the dramatic dialogue tries to be serious and uplifting but the bonked translation just ruins it.
  • So Bad It's Good
  • That One Boss: Max. Why? Because all his pokemon have earthquake in the third gym! I repeat! IN THE THIRD GYM! He also had a pokemon learn fissure.
    • The one with Fissure didn't have any non-ground-type moves, though, making it unable to damage flying-types.
    • Danny also counts. She uses dragon type pokemon. Worse? IT'S A DOUBLE BATTLE! Worst of all? See below.
    • NIEVES. Again, painfully hard Gym, but she has two stupidly strong Pokemon; Freech and Bobeguin. Freech is Dragon-type when all her other Pokemon are Ice, and it has, of all things, Speed Boost, as its ability. And it knows Dragon Claw, which is stronger thanks to STAB. Bobeguin knows Blizzard, which can potentially one-shot anything under Level 30 (which, depending on how much you grind, could be your whole party) thanks to STAB, and it also has Surf to counter your Fire-types.
  • That One Level: Greystone Gym. It's based off the Mossdeep Gym from Ruby and Sapphire (in other words, conveyor maze) except for the fact that it's somehow even harder to navigate, and there's STRENGTH BOULDERS there too! It can take up to an hour to get to Danny, and the fun doesn't stop there...
    • Maroon Gym is arguably worse. Nieves is also pretty hard, but her gym is Wallace/Juan's gym combined with cracked floors that lead to a trainer-less basement/upper floor [1] with ladders that have no correlation to where they should lead to. That alone would make this on par with Greystone, but then there's also INVISIBLE TRAINERS THAT ATTACK YOU WHEN YOU TOUCH THE WATERFALLS.
  • Ugly Cute: The new Pokemon designs could be described as this.
  • Unfortunate Implications: The swirls in the desert that are supposed to represent quicksand, though they look like Swastikas.
    • Lampshaded by Foxy. "SAND HITLERS!"
    • And the molemen:

Molemen are stingy, rude, secretive, greedy, secular and keep all their wealth within their society
... wait... wait... Molemen are incarnations of negative Jewish stereotypes!?
oh Baro you racist card you

  1. If you take ladders that go up or jump down holes, you get to the same place.