Amsterdamned

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Amsterdamned is a 1988 Dutch horror thriller film by Dick Maas (The Lift, Flodder).

Somewhere, somewhere in the black night Shining eyes follow your stride... —"Amsterdamned" by Lois Lane

The film is set in the eponymous (damned!) capital, where a Serial Killer wearing a scuba gear is prowling in the city canals and uses them to get to his victims.

Amsterdam was damned by:

• Eighties Hair
• Absolute Cleavage: Laura's date wear.
• Absurdly Spacious Sewer: Eric chases the killer into one.
• A Date with Rosie Palms: "He's in the john, I expect that he's masturbating."
• Alone with the Psycho
• Animal Reaction Shot: From a cat, during the raft attack.
• Ankle Drag: Happens to the second environmentalist.
• Ate His Gun: The killer, and a harpoon gun at that.
• Attempted Rape: A taxi driver tries to force the prostitute he's accompanying to perform oral sex on him. Unfortunately for him, she bites.
• Badass: Eric.
• Bald of Evil: The killer.
• Big Damn Heroes: Eric and Vermeer arriving just as Laura is about to be dragged under by the killer.
• Blood Is Squicker in Water
• Blood-Splattered Innocents: The prostitute's body is hung from a bridge, and ends up entering a tour boat filled with (among other types) young children and nuns.
• Bow Ties Are Cool: Willy.
• Bus Full of Innocents: Appear throughout the boat chase.
• Butt Monkey: Vermeer.
• Carry a Big Stick: When she thinks he's the killer, Laura beats Martin with a boat oar.
• Chase Scene: Two; the first one has the police chasing a suspect on a motorcycle, and the second one has Eric chase the actual killer on boats they commandeer.
• The Coroner: Sam.
• Covers Always Lie: One makes it look kind of like an alien invasion film.
• Crazy Homeless People: The bag lady.
• Daylight Horror: The raft victim and John's deaths.
• Disposable Sex Worker: The first victim.
• Disturbed Doves: Or ducks, in this case.
• Driven to Suicide: The killer.
• The Drunken Sailor: One of the victims.
• Epic Fail: The main suspect tries to jump an opening bridge on his motorcycle, and fails rather badly.
• Everyone Is a Suspect
• Evil Overlooker
• Eye Scream: "Her eyes were already fish food." And there's also something wrong with one of the sailor victim's eye.
• Facial Horror: When the killer's face is finally revealed, it's pretty fucked up.
• Fan Disservice: The prostitute's naked, mutilated body.
• Fan Service with a Smile
• Fight Scene: An underwater one, between John and the killer.
• Friend to Psychos: Martin, though rather unknowingly.
• Good Colors, Evil Colors: The killer's gear is black, and he steals a black speedboat, while John's gear is yellow, and Eric chases after the killer's boat with a yellow one.
• Good Cop, Bad Cop: Vermeer and Eric, respectively.
• Gory Discretion Shot: The killer committing suicide.
• Gratuitous English
• Grimy Water
• Grievous Bottley Harm: The main suspect lost his job when, in a drunken rage, he attacked someone with a broken bottle.
• Groin Attack: The taxi driver getting bit, and the raft victim getting knifed.
• Hair of Gold: Laura.
• Harpoon Gun: Vermeer gets shot in the arm with one, while Eric sustains a shot to the shoulder a bit later. The killer also commits suicide with one.
• Hazardous Water
• Hope Spot: The second environmentalist swims to shore and flags down a passing truck, but is dragged underwater before help can reach him.
• Hostile Weather: It suddenly becomes stormy during the finale.
• I Know Karate: "No reason to be afraid, I do judo."
• Impending Doom POV: The opening.
• Jerkass: The taxi driver, and the suspect.
• Kid Detective: Anneke and Willy.
• Knife Nut
• Little Miss Snarker: Anneke.
• Lock and Load Montage: The killer gets one.
• Malevolent Masked Men
• Man Bites Man: The first victim deals with the taxi driver trying to force her to perform fellatio on him via biting.
• Mirror Scare
• Moe Greene Special: Eric manages to shoot the killer right in the diving goggles.
• Mr. Exposition: Martin.
• Murderer POV
• Nerd Glasses: Willy.
• No Name Given: Most of the victims, and the killer.
• Obstructive Bureaucrat: The mayor.
• Off with His Head: The first environmentalist's death.
• Once Is Not Enough: Averted.
• One Word Title
• Peek-a-Boo Corpse: After his buddy disappears from their boat, the second enviromentalist pulls in the anchor, and discovers his friend's head impaled on it. Later on, John is scared when a dead sailor pops out of a closet while he is exploring a sunken ship.
• Perma-Stubble: Eric.
• Perp Sweating
• Pie in the Face: Eric stops a bakery robbery by handcuffing the robber, and slamming his face into a cake. It is evidently delicious.
• Pipe Pain: While doing her own little investigation with Willy, Anneke grabs one.
• Portmantitle
• Ramp Jump: With boats!
• Red Herring: The most prominent one being Martin.
• Scenery Porn
• The Scourge of God: The Salvationist died after stealing some money.
• Scream Discretion Shot: The raft victim getting knifed between the legs.
• Seers: Willy claims to be one.
• Serrated Blade of Pain: "He used a similar instrument, but the knife was another type. One important difference is it had a serrated edge."
• Serial Killer
• Shirtless Scene: Eric.
• The Shrink: Martin.
• Slashed Throat: John's death.
• Spiteful Spit: While being interrogated, a suspect spits in Eric's face.
• Spooky Seance: Held by Willy.
• Stealing From the Till: A Salvationist pockets some of the donations she's collected.
• Stranger Behind the Mask: The killer is a random ex-diver pissed off at society because he was disfigured in a toxic waste-related incident.
• Stuff Blowing Up: The killer crashes his own boat into another, resulting in a fiery explosion.
• Tears of Blood: When the sailor's dead body is found, blood appears to be leaking from one of his eyes.
• Ungrateful Bastard: The bakery owner.

"You used excessive force, and you ruined my cake!"

• Vader Breath
• The Voiceless: The killer.