Exiern/Characters

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


The fantasy world of Exiern is a full and rich place, with Loads and Loads of Characters. Here are some of the important ones.


Princess Peonie Translates Tiffany's Tank Top

Tiffany, formerly Typhan-Knee, Starlight.

An obnoxiously misogynistic male barbarian who, on a quest to save a princess, is turned into a very attractive (if extremely crabby) young woman.

She has somewhat reluctantly became the personal guardian of Princess Peonie and is dealing with the crush she has develop on the male scribe Denver Tadwick.

  • Likes: Killing things and getting drunk.
  • Dislikes: Being called a bimbo.
  • Chickification: Justified in-universe—Tiffany is convinced that women are weak and useless, and as soon as she finally accepts her gender change, she becomes... weak and useless. (Much to King Urtica's annoyance, as he does not particularly like weak and useless women. She gets better though.)
  • Gender Bender: Not only is Tiffany by all indications incurably female, her... condition... is contagious.
  • Never Learned to Read: Never had any reason to, really. Until she becomes Peonie's protector and seeks Denver's help, at which point she finds out what the shirt in the page picture says.
  • Thud and Blunder: Played with. Typhan-Knee was this type of hero, but Tiffany is stuck in a much more civilized world.

Princess Peonie Vellurium Balistra

An extraordinarily busty, slightly ditzy but not stupid princess who had been kidnapped by an evil wizard. Peonie is Genre Savvy enough to know that she's supposed to be the love interest in the story, and teases Tifanny about it once in a while. A frequent holder of the Distress Ball.

Since Faden's departure from the script Peonie has developed into something of a Deadpan Snarker.

  • Likes: Yaoi Porn.
  • Dislikes: Constitutional limits on monarchical power.

Faden

The Magical Big Bad of the Exiern world, and planning on sacrificing Peonie, until Typhan-Knee captured him and rescued the princess.

Unable to blast the barbarian with dark magic because of a magical mixup (Someone exchanged his Uricarn Summoning Tome for a UNICORN summoning one - an incident Drow has stated was inspired by This incident in The Wotch), Faden's revenge was to turn Typhan-Knee into Tiffany with a living spell that resists all attempts at being undone and will change the gender of anyone that tries.

An Exclusively Evil character who just lives to make things as awkward for others as possible. Unusually for such characters, Faden is drawn as a youngish man of about 30 as opposed to the stereotypical aged wizard, however he is effectively immortal and just wont stay dead.

Currently in a most decidedly non-Cardboard Prison, supposedly for all eternity there are hints however that this might not be as secure as promoted.

  • Likes: Causing Chaos
  • Dislikes: Being in gaol.

Denver Tadwick

Denver Tadwick, a scholar (read "nerd") who originally enlists Typhan-Knee and Peonie's help to find his missing sister.

He has a fanatical hatred of all dragons due to his and his sister's parents reportedly being killed by one while Denver and his sister were infants. The truth is far more disturbing, Denver and his sister are dragon infants, and he has only a year or two before his dragon-half takes control of his personality and body.

Denver has something of a crush on Tiffany and is one of the few men to have shown her affection and not received a brutal beating in exchange.

  • Likes: Tiffany
  • Dislikes: Dragons.

Sister Teresa, formerly Brother Thomas.

Another victim of Faden's Gender Bender spell. Brother Thomas was leader of a group of priests that tried to cure Tiffany, but instead got transformed.

However, life as a woman clearly appealed to Teresa and she has resisted getting turned back preferring a new life as female, something that annoys Tiffany no end.

Teresa generally means well, but is an upper class snob to put it mildly, and even manages to be a Jerkass when apologising for acting like a Jerkass. She remains a powerful magic user though (with a little help from the King, who orders a silencing punishment laid on her by her former order undone).

  • Likes: Shopping.
  • Dislikes: Ill-educated Northern Barbarians.
  • Chickification: Averted. She stridently resists it, and winds up punished for it.
  • Gender Bender: She seems to have inherited Tiffany's condition in a weaker form, judging by an attempt by her order to restore her male gender temporarily backfiring on one of the priests.
  • Magic Music: of the vocal kind.

King Urtica Ravi Metrotic Rex

Peonie's Dad and King of the Luminary Alliance. One the smarter characters in the strip, and something of a Chessmaster. Loves his daughter fiercely, but is compelled to balance her safety and desires against the good of his kingdom which leaves him less than happy.

He once gave a nine year old boy a heart-attack by sneaking up on him while he was kissing princess Peonie. The King is technically Tiffany's fiancé due to the rescue of Peonie including "A" royal hand in marriage, and when Tiff finds this out he will probably need those 8 foot tall guards that follow him everywhere. (Or maybe not—Urtica may act like a pompous jackass at times, but he's a formidable fighter in his own right.)

  • Likes: Lurking in shadows.
  • Dislikes: People who threaten his daughter.

Cytx

A young boy from a small fishing village who gave Faden a hand. Literally. Turnabout is fair play though, and when he found Faden's own amputated hand the magic left in it allowed him to graft it onto his own arm. This has led to a bit of mental contamination, but it is unclear as to the extent.

He has been driven by an unknown force to follow Tiffany into the big city.

  • Likes: Not getting his hand chopped off.
  • Dislikes: Getting his hand chopped off.

Mira

Ctyx' girl friend, and possibly his girlfriend. She helps him out after Faden injures him, and then accompanies him on his mysterious trip into the City.

Is he Machenating? Or just a blatherskite?


The Speechifying Guy

Mister Exposition. A deranged old tramp who likes to give long-winded speeches explaining the plot to the readers. Disliked by all, and regarded as a right nuisance.

  • Likes: Constitutional limits on monarchical power.
  • Dislikes: Being told to shut up.

Niels and Bhor

A pair of eight foot tall Bodyguards of the King who carry magic swords. Mostly they just perform mildly snarky exposition and give the king someone to talk to that won't freak out over Yaoi being Ruined FOREVER, and will appreciate his Chessmaster tendencies. They also have Punny Names.