Snape's Worst Memory

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Snape's Worst Memory is an AU Snape/Lily fanfic, written by Darkglare. It's a long fic with a reasonable amount of angst and mostly realistic portrayal of characters. Focuses on Severus and Lily's friendship and relationship during their last two years of school. "Snape's Worst Memory" scene happened but with a twist in the form of Regulus Black and his plan to get his brother in trouble, so there was no "Mudblood" incident. Adult themes.

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This fanfiction contains examples of:

• Abusive Parents: Tobias Snape.
• Accidental Pervert: Lily. It really wasn't her intention to watch Severus in his backyard. It was just a huge misunderstanding.
• A Date With Rosie Palms: Mulciber is known for that.
• A Lady On Each Arm: Mary and Lily try it with Severus. Only Lily succeeds. Unless you count the night the three of them spent together (fully clothed) as a security measure. Severus endured it..
• All of the Other Reindeer: Severus. Somewhat Exaggerated, but Justified. He is also unlucky enough to love a Plucky Girl.
• All Take and No Give: Severus and Lily's relationship for the most part. Though Lily genuinely doesn't see it that way.
• All Work vs. All Play: Generally Subverted, since they are both rather studious and responsible, but sometimes played straight on Lily's part, usually regarding sex.
• Alternate Universe Fic.
• A Man Is Always Eager: Subverted with Severus.
• Am I Just a Toy To You?: Severus to Lily, or so he thinks.

...this was not a good time to be sending her letters accusing her of being a bossy know-it-all that he was tired of having toy around with him.

• Ambition Is Evil: Subverted with Severus: despite of him being a Slytherin he has no real ambition.
  • Played for Laughs by Lily and Severus while discussing each other's future Chocolate Frog Cards. Severus even made one for Lily:

"At the mere age of seventeen, Lily Evans knocked the wizarding world arse over tea kettle with a ballpoint pen."

• A Mind Is a Terrible Thing To Read: Dumbledore doesn't like that he sees in Severus' mind.
• Animals Hate Him: Inverted: some animals like him but they are either Mrs Norris or his raven Phi, whom he gets as a gift and initially treats as a nuisance.
• Angst? What Angst?: Lily.
  • Subverted with Severus because while some things hurt him deeply, he doesn't usually show it:

He [Avery] was scared shitless. Someone who could shrug off the death of his own mother? …

• Anti-Hero: Severus.
• Attention Whore: James Potter, duh.
  • Subverted, somewhat, with Gilderoy Lockhart: it seems he was a lot nicer as a student.
• Bad Dreams: Severus (and Lily notices).
• Badass Baritone: Severus, but only after he suffered very severe case of dragon pox, which spread to his throat. And technically, his badass side shows itself only when he is protecting Lily from the werewolf.
• Badass Normal: Tobias Snape and his friends, who killed Rodolphus and Rabastan Lestranges and almost killed Bellatrix.
• Batman Gambit: Severus uses it successfully.
• Berserk Button: For James, whenever he sees Severus too close to Lily. Severus uses it against him in the Ministry while getting their apparation licenses.
• Bonding Over Missing Parents: Subverted with Lily and Severus: they don't even understand each other's feelings concerning the matter.
  • Also Word of God thinks it was one of the main reasons for Lily's change of heart towards James in the canon.
• Bookworm: Severus and Barty Crouch Jr.
• Born Winner: James, at least he thinks that way.
• Brilliant but Lazy: James and Sirius.
• Calling Your Orgasms: Lily.
• Can't Hold His Liquor: Lily. Severus doesn't take advantage at first, but when the time is right he does.
• Cats Are Mean: Subverted with Mrs Norris. She isn't really mean. Only to rats.
• Closer to Earth: Inverted. Severus is a reasonable one. The same with the other two Slytherin/Gryffindor couples in the fic.
• Childhood Friend Romance: Arguably.
• Compliment Fishing: Lily:

Lily: You don't think I'm getting too fat, do you, Sev? Lily said 'too fat'. She knew she was gaining weight. Why bother asking him about it?

• Convenience Store Gift Shopping: Usually neither Severus nor Lily are pleased with each other's gifts.
  • Oddly enough, Petunia sends Severus "thank you" letter for his wedding gift. Though, he chose it from the list she made herself.
• Crying Wolf: Marauders. Even when they really haven't done anything, nobody believes them.
• Deadly Prank.
• Death Is a Sad Thing.
• Dirty Business: Dumbledore does that, breaking into Severus' house in the company of Mundungus Fletcher because he thinks Slytherin locket may be there.
• Dropping the Bombshell: Dumbledore does that to Severus. Played for Drama.
• Don't Look At Me: Severus tried it with Lily, but failed.
• Drink Order: Dumbledore was shocked when he found out that Severus, unlike himself, drinks tea without sugar.
  • Lily likes mead very much.
• Everybody Has Lots of Sex: For the last two years of Hogwarts, they do. Or would like to. Hence, contraceptive magic at the castle. And really, why have so many unused classrooms?

Students were snogging and shagging all over the castle. Didn't have to be a prefect or head girl to know that.

• Everyone Is Related: Severus discovers this, when he inherits from Lestranges, who prior to their deaths killed his father.
• Fiery Redhead: Lily.
• Forgets to Eat: Severus.
• Freudian Excuse: Severus has a big one.
• Friends With Benefits: On Lily's side.
• Guess Who I'm Marrying: Walburga and Slughorn to poor Regulus.
• "Happy Ending" Massage: Lily wants to do it to Severus and won't take no for an answer.
• Hates Baths: Severus doesn't, but:

He hurried since if Lily got through washing herself then she insisted on washing him. When she did, only one part of him got washed really well, and everything else was ignored.

• Hates Being Touched: Severus. Lily is the only exception for him. Later would tolerate Mary.
• Hidden Badass: Severus.
• Holy Burns Evil: Petunia splashes Severus with holy water when he accompanies them to the church. Subverted.

Petunia: Won't he burst into flames as soon as he sets foot inside a church?

• Humble Hero: Severus, in the eyes of some people. But he just doesn't care.
• I Can Still Fight: Severus, but he doesn't have a choice, literally.
• Ignore the Fanservice: Severus tries to do it with Lily sometimes, but never succeeds. He completely ignores Mary, though.
• Innocently Insensitive: James to Lily, sometimes Lily to Severus.
• Intergenerational Friendship: Severus and Xenophilius Lovegood (he is already working as an editor).
• I Owe You My Life: Mary and Lily to Severus. Played for Drama because when Severus' life was in danger, Lily's Life Debt forced her to take action which cost them their unborn child.
• Just Friends: Lily's line.
• Kick Them While They Are Down: James and Sirius do that to Severus.
  • Severus does it too, but is much more sneaky about it.
• Kids Are Cruel: Some of them are.
• Lack of Empathy: Lily, Severus and most of the characters.
• Lie Back and Think of England: Severus when Lily is in the mood, but he is not. So, Inverted.
• Loners Are Freaks: It doesn't help Severus' reputation. Even Lily thinks Severus needs more friends than just her. He disagrees.
• Love Hurts: Severus.
• Love Potion: Discussed and deconstructed by Lily.
• Lust Object: Severus to Lily.
• Mangst: Severus.
• Masquerade Ball.
• Misery Builds Character: Severus.
• Mistaken Confession: Lily to her parents.
• Mistaken for Murderer: Sirius Black. But not in the way you thought.
• Moment Killer: Dumbledore.
• More Than Meets the Eye: Severus.
• Muscles Are Meaningless: In the wizarding world they are, and Severus proves it.
• Neat Freak: Petunia.
• Not Helping Your Case: When Mc Gonagall accuses the Marauders of attacking Snape because he's a half-blood in Chapter 7, James responds that they would have attacked him no matter what his parents were.
• Not What It Looks Like: When Mrs Evans catches them in Lily's bedroom in compromising position. Severus' reaction - I Can Explain. And he does. Still, Lily gets in trouble.
  • Slughorn got his moment with Magical Law Enforcement and bloodied Severus. It did not end well.
• Odd Friendship: Severus and Lily.
• Plucky Girl: Lily. Despite all the bad things that keep happening to her and her friends, she doesn't seem to be affected.
• Poster Gallery Bedroom: Mulciber's posters from his Porn Stash.
• Porn Stash: A lot of students had it to Minerva's disappointment.
• Reasonable Authority Figure: Minerva McGonagall, Alastor Gumboil, Healer Pye.
• Ron the Death Eater: Played with. James, Sirius, Slughorn and Dumbledore don't do anything too out of character, but it all just goes horribly wrong.
• Sand in My Eyes: Reconstructed with Severus.
• Secret Relationship: Severus and Lily.
• Sex Equals Love: Subverted. Severus was in love with her before they did it, and Lily isn't in love with him at all.
• Sweet Tooth: Dumbledore and Slughorn. Exaggerated.
• Switching POV.
• Teen Drama.
• The Cassandra: Lily. She accurately predicted almost everything that would happen to Severus in their Sixth Year while doing her Divination assignment. But neither of them tried to do much about it.
• The Drag Along: Peter Pettigrew.
• The Glorious War of Sisterly Rivalry: Lily and Petunia. Not as ugly as in the canon.
• Their First Time.
• Trouble Follows You Home.
• Virginity Makes You Stupid: Lily doesn't know a lot of things about sex that a girl her age would know, even in the seventies.
• Voluntary Shapeshifting: Severus doesn't hesitate to use the Polyjuice Potion when needed.
  • Marauders and McGonagall, of course.
• Wedding Day.
• What Could Possibly Go Wrong?: Lily and her friends' attitude before the werewolf incident.
• You Are Grounded: Lily by her parents.