Kingdom Hearts: The Short and Honest Version
Kingdom Hearts: The Short and Honest Version is a Deconstructive Parody of the Kingdom Hearts series by NCHammer326. Casting Sora in the role of the Only Sane Man, the series is based upon lampshading and ridiculing every trope of the series with absurd amounts of pop culture references.
The sequel, which focuses on Kingdom Hearts II, can be found here.
- Abridged Series: Of Kingdom Hearts.
- Artificial Stupidity: Donald and Goofy suffers greatly from this, as well as general stupidity. Goofy in particular is considered utterly worthless.
- Author Avatar: makes several appereances, usually being belittled by Sora.
- Badass Princess: While not technically a princess, Belle was apparently a member of the Wu Tang Clan.
- Buffy-Speak: Axel's weapons are referred to as, and I quote, 'spinny woosh-woosh blades'.
- Chew Bubblegum
- Cluster F-Bomb
- Deadpan Snarker: Sora, though less deadpan and more rage-filled.
- Deconstructor Fleet
- The Ditz: Save a few Sanity Ball holders, EVERYONE who's not a Jerkass, and sometimes they overlap.
- Driven to Suicide: As early as the sixth chapter.
- Forgot About His Powers: Sora's biggest obstacle.
- Fridge Horror: Sora's opinion on how Dr. Finklestein managed to acquire a beating heart for Jack's project:
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"That raises a lot of questions, all of them with horrifying answers." |
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- Giving Up on Logic: Sora's status as the Only Sane Man is constantly under assault due to everything happening around him, and he frequently bemoans that fact. Probably the most explicit case comes from chapter 4.
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Sora: Wait, that secret door is the only way into this room. Where did the other door…you know what? Forget it, nothing makes sense anymore. It's pointless to ask any questions. |
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- Groin Attack: Roxas hits Axel with a couple[1] when time is stopped.
- Jerkass: Everyone who's not an idiot (and sometimes not even that), though Riku is the prime jerkass of the story.
- Lampshade Hanging: Plenty.
- Leeroy Jenkins: In this exchange:
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Sora: So we're going rush blindly into a cave to fight a bloodthirsty psychopath who has no compassion, the destructive tendencies of a tornado, and basically breathes rape and despair. Am I getting this right? |
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- Little Miss Badass: Kairi is apparently the founder of the Crips.
- The Load: Donald and Goofy, particularly the latter, are completely useless.
- No Fourth Wall: Sora often argues with the author.
- Obviously Evil: Clayton, who by his own words:
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"As you can tell by my British accent, tiny moustache, boomstick, desire to hunt gorillas, and my grotesque chin, I'm an enourmous asshole. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to punt some puppies off the edge of a cliff. Nyeh heh heh..." |
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- Only Sane Man: Sora. It's the focus of almost all the humor. Roxas also fulfills this role during the tutorial section of KH II.
- The Power of Rock: Oogie Boogie is defeated by this at the hands of the ghosts of Bob Marley, Kurt Cobain, Elvis, Tupac, Freddie Mercury, and Jimi Hendrix.
- Rule 34: Reminding Sora of this will creep the poor guy out.
- Running Gag: Sora, Donald, Goofy and the (insert band), calling Yuffie a hooker.
- Sanity Ball: Mostly Sora holds onto it, but other characters such as Kairi, Yen Sid and The Emperor from Mulan seem to hold this as well.
- Schedule Slip: The story updates rather infrequently, which is commonly lampshaded.
- Shout-Out: Filled with this, especially to musicians and bands.
- Surrounded by Idiots: Sora, which quickly drives him insane.
- Tradesnark™: Whenever Mickey is mentioned.
- Unusually Uninteresting Sight: Averted. Sora reacts in horror the first time he sees Donald Duck and Goofy. Eventually, he just stops giving a shit about all the weird stuff he sees.
- ↑ thousand