Kid Icarus: Uprising/Quotes
Just because this game is full of them, we now have a page dedicated to the nonstop banterfest of Kid Icarus: Uprising. All spoilers will be unmarked, but will be kept in specific folders for your convenience.
Pit: Lady Palutena, I can't believe it, I have my own quotes page! |
How to Play
Palutena: I'll help you prepare for the battles ahead, Pit. |
Palutena: Quickly flick the circle pad in any direction to dash that way. Hold it to run. |
General Quotes that appear throughout the Game
Pit: You know how a chicken takes three steps and forgets? |
Palutena: The monster situation is quite clamant. |
Palutena: It looks like your wings are losing feathers, Pit. |
Pit: Wouldn't it be nice to be a goldfish? |
(when you have a staff equipped and Palutena and Pit are discussing how it's good for sniping) |
(when you have claws equipped) |
(when you have orbitars equipped during chapters where Viridi is mission control) |
(when you have an arm equipped during chapters where Viridi is mission control) |
(when you have a blade equipped during chapters where Viridi is mission control) |
Viridi: Oh, look at us fighting on the same side! It's like you're a member of my army now. |
Chapters 1-5
Chapter 1
Medusa: Hello again, Pit. And you, too, Palutena. Here to crash my homecoming party? |
Pit: Do you hear that? Do you hear the peoples' cheers? They're celebrating the return of the goddess Palutena! |
Pit: Twinbellows! |
Chapter 2
Pit:Whoaaaa! G-Force in my faaace! |
Pit: So this is the dark lord's castle. |
Pit: Magnus sure is strong. |
Palutena: I can also see what's in your heart. |
Pit: Wait, is this... Ha! It is! A hot spring! |
Dark Lord Gaol: It's so typical of you to pawn off your work on someone else. |
Palutena: I don't know much about the situation... But it seems that Magnus and Gaol used to be close friends. |
(If Magnus is defeated before Pit and Palutena are finished talking) |
Chapter 3
Hewdraw 1: Hello, there. |
Pit: Get ready, 'cause it's time for-- |
Hewdraw 1: Oh... I'm the only one left! |
Hewdraw 2: Where did Lefty and Righty go? |
Hewdraw 3: Ah! The other heads! You have no right! |
Hewdraw 1: So, you killed my brothers? |
Hewdraw 1: No... I'm too pretty to die! *dies* |
Hewdraw 2: So, you've finished off the others, eh? |
Hewdraw 2: Look how far you've come, Pit! I'm proud of you. *dies* |
Hewdraw 3: So nice to see you again! |
Hewdraw 3: Before I die, I just wanna say- *dies* |
Chapter 4
Palutena: You remember Reapers, don't you? From the Underworld? |
Palutena: I'm trying to find another one of Medusa's commanders, Pandora. |
Palutena: Reapers may look all evil and crazy, but there's a good reason for that. |
Pit: Considering this is the Reaper fortress, there really aren't many Reapers. |
Pit: Not this guy! |
Palutena: Those aren't just flirty looks coming from the Great Reaper's eyes. |
Pit: You know what, Lady Palutena? |
Chapter 5
Pit: I have to hustle before the Power of Flight runs out! |
Palutena: It's a Handora ambush! |
Pit: Is THIS a dead end? |
Pandora: The new me leads a more grounded life. Yoga, macrobiotics, reflexology... |
(after going down a hallway that loops back to the same room) |
Pit: Where are we? |
Pit: What's an Exo Tank doing here anyway? |
Palutena: The Mirror of Truth makes a copy of whatever stands in front of it. |
Pit: Does the mirror copy its soul too, or just its body? |
Palutena: Pandora certainly has... (whispering) interesting ideas about interior design. |
Palutena: Those orange platforms seem to spell something. |
Pit: I guess it's bouncy time. |
Pit: You know I appreciate your help, Lady Palutena, but I'd be totally fine without all this hand-holding too. |
Pandora: You're here. Yay. |
Pandora: Let's get right to introductions. This here is Dark Pit. He'll be your escort out of this life. |
Pandora: You fool! You were created to serve me! Your opponent's over there! |
Chapters 6-9
Chapter 6
Pit: Are you with the Underworld Army? Is that why you have it out for me? |
Medusa: You're a real go-getter, Dark Pit. I like that. |
Dark Pit: Hey there, Pit Stain! |
Pit: It's a shame that Pittoo is just so obnoxious. Just think of all the stuff you could get done with more than one of yourself. |
Pit: Why are you all doom and gloom all the time, Pittoo? |
Dark Pit: Bring it, puppet! |
Chapter 7
Pit: Wait, so I'm going to be fighting his forces under the sea? How am I supposed to do that? |
Tanatos: Oh goodie! Guests! Protecting an impregnable fortress can get awfully lonely! |
Thanatos: *Transforms into a bat* Kee! Kee! |
Thanatos: *Transforms into an urn* I'm just gonna catch a few Zs here. By the way, your attacks are useless. |
Thanatos: *Transforms into a doll* |
Thanatos: *Transforms into an array of spears and a sword* ~Slicety-Sliiiice! Dicety-Diiiice! Stabbity-stab-stab-staaaaab!~ |
Thanatos: *Transforms into a giant foot* |
Chapter 8
Pit: With Medusa's commanders out of the way, we're getting to the battle of battles! But this isn't the way to the Underworld. Where are we going? |
Pit: So I should destroy the shiny thing? |
Pit: Is that a switch? |
Space Pirate Captain: *gibberish* |
Palutena: A space kraken?! Well, that came out of nowhere! |
Pit: The box has really held up well! |
Chapter 9
Palutena: Look at those Trailtails drawing lines. |
Pit: Pittoo! What are you doing here? |
Dark Pit: Hi-yah! |
Pit: Twinbellows! Here, boy! Old Pit's gonna teach you even MORE new tricks! And if you're good, I'll take you for a walk and give you a bath and a treat. We're gonna rack up some serious Nintendogs trainer points together! |
Medusa: I find it very ironic that you would call yourself the "goddess of light". After all, it was you who turned me into a monster! It was you who hunted me down! |
Pit: Huh? What the heck is that?! |
Medusa: I can sense you getting closer, Pit! |
Pit: Listen well, all you demons of the Underworld! In the name of the goddess Palutena! The defender of all that is good! Those who hide in the darkness will be made to face the light. |
Pit: Wow, warping that huge body must be a pain! |
Pit: We did it! We really did it! |
Hades: Sorry to keep YOU waiting. But now that I'm here, let's get this party started! |
Hades: Her thirst for revenge was so great it seemed a shame to let it go to waste. Oh, pretty Palutena. You must have really done a number on her. |
Hades: I must bid you... adieu. |
Chapters 10-14
Chapter 10
Pit: My wish would be to fly by myself! |
Palutena: He's the Phoenix. Don't worry, he'll come back. |
Hades: So the "good guys" covet the Wish Seed as well, eh? Tell me, goddess. What do you wish for? Is it all kittens and rainbows, or is it something more... interesting? |
Palutena: Look, Pit! A hot spring! |
Palutena: The Phoenix is up ahead. |
Chapter 11
Viridi: Hahahaha! Nice shot, if I do say so myself! |
Viridi: So you're the famous Palutena! I hear you've been busy! |
Pit: This is a pretty twisted version of "nature"... |
Palutena: It looks like there used to be a hot spring here. |
Pit: This place is big. |
Pit: A hot spring! A HUGE HOT SPRING! |
Palutena: Viridi's army is called the Forces of Nature. Most of her troops are made from natural materials, like wood, dirt, and rocks. |
Chapter 12
Viridi: What mischief are you two getting into now? Rise, my children, and pluck this dweeb from the air! |
Viridi: Dang it, Hades! Get your filthy troops out of MY bomb depot! |
Pit: Wowza! |
Viridi: More Underworld forces! |
Chapter 13
Pit (singing): Again today I will go soaring through the sky |
Palutena: With all this firepower, Arlon must be gearing up for a massive attack! |
Pit: What's a purview? And why do you talk like that? |
Arlon: Let me introduce you to the Flages, the covert-ops specialists for Viridi's army. Do they strike your fancy? |
Arlon: Oh yes, I almost forgot. |
Palutena: Deploying the Palutena Super-Sensor. |
Palutena: Pittoo just isn't happy unless he's fighting someone. |
Chapter 14
Pit: But this is Thanatos's third time around! |
Hades: Thannypoo, are you okay? |
Phosphora: Finishing blow! |
Pit: (dodges laser) Wah! |
Palutena: Phosphora is busy recharging at the temple's center. |
Phosphora: Hello there! |
Chapters 15-17
Chapter 15
Pyrrhon: Lemme drop a little knowledge on you! |
Pyrrhon: Feel the wrath of my pyro blasters, space weirdos! HAHAHAHAHA! Kablooey! Kablammy! |
Pit: Is this... the future? |
Viridi: An elevator into a torture chamber! Convenient! |
Pit: Hey look, an Exo Tank! |
Pit: Nooo! |
Pit: Nononononononono! |
Hades: Tell me, Pitty Pat, why exactly can’t you fly? |
Chapter 16
Viridi: Hey! am I the only one paying attention here? Look! Those Aurum "troops" are just ripoffs of Underworld enemies! |
Hades: Weee aarrrre from outerr spaaaaaace... |
Hades: Don't curse the darkness, light a candle! When freaky aliens give you lemons, make freaky alien lemonade! Like this! |
Palutena: Pit look, there's a hot spring! |
Palutena: Look, there’s an Aether Ring. |
Pit: The Forces of Nature? |
Chapter 17
Viridi: That Kolma is trying to hitch a free ride! What a deadbeat! |
Pyrrhon: Do your thing, Pit. You know, your... shooting thing. |
Pyrrhon: Ahahahahahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! Nicely done! |
Hades: Oh snap. Poor Pitty got duped. |
Pit: What kind of rat tricks an angel, Pyrrhon?! |
Viridi: Time to let nature take its course. |
Pit: The centurions are in way over their heads! |
Aurum Pyrrhon: [1] |
Chapters 18-22
Chapter 18
Pit: I...guess I'm a dog now. This is getting weirder and weirder... But where'd the little girl go? Hmm. She must have run off. Anyway, on to the town! I gotta be careful not to drop the ring. So that means no more mouth-breathing. And no crazy barking. And no eating delicious garbage off the ground... Not that I would, of course. |
Pit (still as a dog): Good thing the centurions are on patrol. The square's looking... RUFF! Heh heh. |
Pit: Hey, something smells really good. This new sniffer is really doing its job. Is that garbage? Beef garbage? Man, I am SO hungry! Why am I craving garbage? Oh no no no! Stop drooling, stop drooling! The slobber's getting the ring all wet! Ugh, I'm grossing myself out! |
Pit: (to Magnus, still a dog) Hey! Hey! How's it going? Listen, you gotta take this ring! Go on! Take it! |
Pit: It feels like just yesterday we were fighting together. |
Magnus: No-one knows what happened. Did your goddess just lose her mind? |
(Magnus is up against a centurion strongarm - twice his height, and each arm is as thick around as his body) |
(Magnus is up against more centurions) |
Magnus: Why are there so many enemies today? What, was MinionMart having a sale? |
Magnus: Hot springs don't usually heal humans. You must be having an effect on me. |
Pit's Body: ... |
Palutena: Well, it's been a while, Pit! |
(At Viridi's temple) |
Chapter 19
Pit: Underworld troops on the scene! |
Viridi: The force field around Palutena's temple is incredibly strong. We're going to need to borrow the Lightning Chariot. |
Hades: Well, hello again, friends! |
Pit: I guess there is only one thing I can do. I'll go talk to this Chariot Master guy in person. He's at the top of this tower, right? |
Viridi: Those floor panels alternate between hurting you and not hurting you. They don't seem to have any affect on those Underworld enemies, though. Odd. |
Pit: Ok, so we've got rolling obstacles. |
Pit: Am I ever going to get to the top of this tower? |
Pit: This isn't how I wanted things to go, but I have to save Lady Palutena! |
Pit: What's happening to you? |
Chapter 20
Pit: Gaaaaaaah! My skin feels like it's going to peel right off! |
Palutena: Hello again, Pit. |
Hades: Sorry I'm late! Thanks for clearing the way for me, Pitty Pat. |
Pit: It's a long way down. |
(Should Pit fail the Exo-Tank segment) |
(Should he fail again) |
Viridi: It's finally time to save Palutena! |
Chapter 21
Pit: Seriously? Now what? |
(If Pit fails to shoot down the Chaos Kin at the end of the Air Battle) |
Viridi: Wave six! Wait, that's a Boom Stomper and some Bumpety Bombs! Those are MY troops too! |
Pit: You know, Komaytos look an awful lot like little Metroids. |
Dark Pit: Looks like you could use a little help. |
Dark Pit: Our Pre-boss-battle rally cry! |
Pit: You'll pay for what you've done, Chaos Kin! |
Chapter 22
Hades: My goodness, it feels wonderful to be on the winning team. |
Dark Pit: It's been fun touring the City of Souls and all, but we're here to save Pit, right? |
Palutena: This WAS a stream of souls. But so many lives have been lost that it's now a torrent. All souls need to find their final resting place down here so that life can spring anew. That's part of the natural cycle of life. But Hades keeps playing with souls. He won't let them rest. His bloodlust has thrown everything off balance. |
Pit: Lady Palutena! Lady Palutena!!! |
Chapters 23-25
Chapter 23
Pit: Hades! |
Hades: Having fun, Pitty Pat?! |
Pit: I'm trapped! |
Pit: If only Lady Palutena were here to help me. She'd be so grossed out. |
Pit: ...Why is there a grind rail in here? |
Hades: Hahahaha, surprised? |
Hades: Unfortunately for you, there's only one way out. |
Pit: Hm? What's that? |
Pit: (high-pitched) "It looks like there's a way forward, Pit!" |
Dark Pit: If it weren't for that explosion, I never would've found you. |
Chapter 24
Dyntos: Palutena, you'd do well to put a muzzle on your chicken. |
Pit: Sometimes it feels like I'm fighting the entire universe. |
Dyntos: Here it is. The Great Sacred Treasure! |
Chapter 25
Hades: Hello again, Pitty. |
Pit: The Great Sacred Treasure is falling apart! |
Viridi: He's covered from head to toe in weaponry. Like a rainbow apocalypse. |
Palutena and Viridi: Medusa!?! |
Pit: I fight for all creatures living and breathing! I fight for all departed souls still hanging in limbo! But most of all, I fight for Lady Palutena, the goddess of light! And it's in all their names that I will crush you, lord of the Underworld! I won't let you desecrate another soul! |
Hades: It's hard to believe... But actually you got me, Pit. The nerve of you. |
Pit: Listen to those cheers! We did it! We saved every living thing! Everywhere!!! |
Viridi: Hey! Pay attention! I'm talking at you! |
Palutena: It's true. Humans are selfish little creatures driven by greed. Sounds a lot like us gods, wouldn't you say? |
The End...?
Hades: Well, I must say I am impressed. Such a teeny little angel defeating such a big, bad god of the Underworld. Why, Pitty... that must make you the most powerful Nintendo character of all time! ...I'm actually rather proud of you. 8-bit Pit would have never made it this far. But don't worry, I'm not going to tear up the credits again, the game really is over. Which is why I'm here to delete your save data! 1-2-3-GONE! |