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Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.
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'''Quark''': Ficus, I don't have time for long lists!
'''Quark''': Ficus, I don't have time for long lists!
'''Ficus''': -in which case we'll probably also be killed.
'''Ficus''': -in which case we'll probably also be killed.
'''Quark''': Ficus, what you're saying is that all possibilities end in our death.|"All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 1"}}
'''Quark''': Ficus, what you're saying is that all possibilities end in our death.
|"All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 1"}}


Not a [[Deep Space Nine|Ferengi bartender]], nor a [[Quantum Physics|subatomic particle]], but a 1970s sci-fi [[Parody Tropes|parody]] of ''[[Star Trek]]'' from ''[[Get Smart]]'' co-creator Buck Henry. It was basically the US-version of ''[[Red Dwarf]]'', but with only [[Too Good to Last|eight episodes]].
Not a [[Deep Space Nine|Ferengi bartender]], nor a [[Quantum Physics|subatomic particle]], but a 1977 sci-fi [[Parody Tropes|parody]] of ''[[Star Trek]]'' from ''[[Get Smart]]'' co-creator Buck Henry. '''''Quark''''' was basically the US version of ''[[Red Dwarf]]'', only eleven years earlier and with only [[Too Good to Last|eight episodes]].


The show was set on the ''United Galaxies Sanitation Patrol Cruiser'', a garbage scow working for the United Galaxies Space Station Perma 1. It regularly satirized ''[[Star Trek]]'', ''[[Star Wars]]'', ''[[2001: A Space Odyssey]]'', and ''[[Flash Gordon (comic strip)|Flash Gordon]]''. The characters were:
The show was set on the ''United Galaxies Sanitation Patrol Cruiser'', a garbage scow working for the United Galaxies Space Station Perma 1. It regularly satirized ''[[Star Trek]]'', ''[[Star Wars]]'', ''[[2001: A Space Odyssey]]'', and ''[[Flash Gordon (comic strip)|Flash Gordon]]''. The characters were:
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* '''Gene/Jean''': [[Number Two]], with the twist that he's a "transmute," with both male and female chromosomes (and both sets of hormones). Thus, as Gene, he's a [[Jerkass]], but as Jean (complete with a [[Cross-Dressing Voices|female voice]]), she's a [[Technical Pacifist]].
* '''Gene/Jean''': [[Number Two]], with the twist that he's a "transmute," with both male and female chromosomes (and both sets of hormones). Thus, as Gene, he's a [[Jerkass]], but as Jean (complete with a [[Cross-Dressing Voices|female voice]]), she's a [[Technical Pacifist]].
* '''Ficus Pandorata''': [[The Spock]] taken to the extremes, he's a "Vegeton," a member of [[Plant Aliens|sentient plant race]]. He always speaks with [[Spock Speak]], has no emotions at all, cares about no one, and breeds by pollinating.
* '''Ficus Pandorata''': [[The Spock]] taken to the extremes, he's a "Vegeton," a member of [[Plant Aliens|sentient plant race]]. He always speaks with [[Spock Speak]], has no emotions at all, cares about no one, and breeds by pollinating.
* '''Andy''': A [[Cowardly Sidekick]] [[Robot Buddy]], he was basically a stupid [[Hitch Hikers Guide to The Galaxy|Marvin]].
* '''Andy''': A [[Cowardly Sidekick]] [[Robot Buddy]], he was basically a stupid Marvin a year before ''[[The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy]]''.
* '''Otto Palindrome''': The [[Obstructive Bureaucrat]] who is in charge of Perma 1. He loves making Quark miserable.
* '''Otto Palindrome''': The [[Obstructive Bureaucrat]] who is in charge of Perma 1. He loves making Quark miserable.
* '''Dink''': The [[Non-Human Sidekick]] for Otto, he was basically Cousin It from ''[[The Addams Family]]'' [[Recycled in Space|IN SPACE]].
* '''Dink''': The [[Non-Human Sidekick]] for Otto, he was basically Cousin It from ''[[The Addams Family]]'' [[Recycled in Space|IN SPACE]].
* '''The Head''': The [[Bad Boss]] crossed with a giant [[Rubber Forehead Aliens|Rubber Forehead Alien]], Otto answered to him, and he frequently assigned Quark to bizarre jobs.
* '''The Head''': The [[Bad Boss]] crossed with a giant [[Rubber Forehead Aliens|Rubber Forehead Alien]], Otto answered to him, and he frequently assigned Quark to bizarre jobs.
----
=== ''Quark'' has examples of: ===


{{tropelist}}
* [[Actor Allusion]] (the episode "Goodbye Polumbus" was a reference to ''[[Goodbye Columbus]]'' which actor Richard Benjamin [Quark] played the lead)
* [[Affectionate Parody]]
* [[Affectionate Parody]]
* [[AI Is a Crapshoot]] (in the last episode, their ship gets a new computer called Vanessa, while proceeds to turn crazy and try to kill them in a parody of ''2001: A Space Odyssey'' and the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "The Ultimate Computer")
* [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot]]: In the last episode, their ship gets a new computer called Vanessa, while proceeds to turn crazy and try to kill them in a parody of ''[[2001: A Space Odyssey]]'' and the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "The Ultimate Computer"
* [[Captain's Log]] (as a parody of ''[[Star Trek]]'', Quark had one every few minutes, often [[Lampshade Hanging]] whatever was happening)
* [[Captain's Log]]: As a parody of ''[[Star Trek]]'', Quark had one every few minutes, often [[Lampshade Hanging]] whatever was happening
* [[Cloning Blues]] (the Bettys are both in love with Quark and don't know which is the original)
* [[Cloning Blues]]: The Bettys are both in love with Quark and don't know which is the original
* [[Cool Starship]] (subverted: they travel on a ''garbage scow'')
* [[Cool Starship]]: Subverted: they travel on a ''garbage scow''
* [[Death Trap]] (Zorgon ''loves'' these and Ficus ends one episode in one)
* [[Death Trap]]: Zorgon ''loves'' these and Ficus ends one episode in one
* [[Evil Overlord]] (Zorgon the Malevolent, Most Vicious Gorgon Space Pirate and Half-Brother to the High Gorgon Himself)
* [[Evil Overlord]]: Zorgon the Malevolent, Most Vicious Gorgon Space Pirate and Half-Brother to the High Gorgon Himself
* [[Evil Twin]] (the whole cast except for Ficus got them when they passed through a black hole, in a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episodes "The Enemy Within" and "Mirror, Mirror")
* [[Evil Twin]]: The whole cast except for Ficus got them when they passed through a black hole, in a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episodes "The Enemy Within" and "Mirror, Mirror"
* [[Fan Service]] (The Bettys)
* [[Fan Service]]: The Bettys
* [[Friday Night Death Slot]]
* [[Friday Night Death Slot]]
* [[Gender Blender Name]] (Gene/Jean both ''sound'' the same)
* [[Gender Blender Name]]: Gene/Jean both ''sound'' the same
* [[Lotus Eater Machine]]: in "Goodbye, Polumbus," the Gorgons' machine designed to drain the minds of brilliant scientists traps the crew in their own fantasies, in a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "Shore Leave"
* [[Hey, It's That Guy!]] (Correct me if I'm wrong, but would Otto Palindrome be a descendant of [[Mork and Mindy|Fred Mc Connell]]?)
* [[MacGuffin]]: in "All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms," Zorgon demands Quark tell him where "it" is. Quark, having no idea what "it" is, lies. We never find out exactly what "it" is, but Quark ends up with a worthless rock necklace.
* [[Lotus Eater Machine]] (in "Goodbye Polumbus," the Gorgons' machine designed to drain the minds of brilliant scientists traps the crew in their own fantasies, in a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "Shore Leave")
* [[Mad Scientist's Beautiful Daughter]]: Princess Libido, daughter of Zorgon, who wants to marry Ficus.
* [[MacGuffin]] (in "All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms," Zorgon demands Quark tell him where "it" is. Quark, having no idea what "it" is, lies. We never find out exactly what "it" is, but Quark ends up with a worthless rock necklace.)
* [[Meaningful Name]]: Parodied - Ficus is a plant, Palindrome's personal name is one, Gene/Jean has male and female chromosomes in their genes, Andy is an android, etc.
* [[Mad Scientist's Beautiful Daughter]] (Princess Libido, daughter of Zorgon, who wants to marry Ficus)
* [[Multi-Armed and Dangerous]]: In the pilot there was Interface, a four-armed alien woman who controlled communications between ships.
* [[Meaningful Name]] (parodied - Ficus is a plant, Palindrome's first name is one, Gene/Jean has male and female chromosomes in their genes, Andy is an android, etc.)
* [[Negative Space Wedgie]]: It couldn't avoid them, as it parodied ''[[Star Trek]]''.
* [[Multi-Armed and Dangerous]] (in the pilot there was Interface, a four-armed alien woman who controlled communications between ships)
* [[Overnight Age-Up]]: In a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "The Deadly Years," Quark due to some [[Applied Phlebotinum]] starts aging two years for every hour
* [[Negative Space Wedgie]] (couldn't avoid 'em as it parodied ''[[Star Trek]]'')
* [[Perpetual Poverty]]: When Palindrome and the Head have to send a [[Science Marches On|telegram]] to Quark in the pilot, they end up spending the entire episode arguing about the cost of sending it and trying to reduce the number of words.
* [[Overnight Age-Up]] (in a parody of the ''[[Star Trek]]'' episode "The Deadly Years," Quark due to some [[Applied Phlebotinum]] starts aging two years for every hour)
* [[Planet of Hats]]: The Gorgons are all sort of a [[Proud Warrior Race]] that's evil, too. For example:
* [[Perpetual Poverty]] (when Palindrome and the Head have to send a [[Science Marches On|telegram]] to Quark in the pilot, they end up spending the entire episode arguing about the cost of sending it and trying to reduce the number of words)
* [[Planet of Hats]] (The Gorgons are all sort of a [[Proud Warrior Race Guy|proud warrior race]] that's evil, too. For example:
{{quote|"People of Spartan, this is the High Gorgon. I command your unconditional surrender. You shall be treated with compassion, honor and patience. You have twenty seconds before I blow you out of the galaxy."}}
{{quote|"People of Spartan, this is the High Gorgon. I command your unconditional surrender. You shall be treated with compassion, honor and patience. You have twenty seconds before I blow you out of the galaxy."}}
* [[Techno Babble]] (satirizes it)
* [[Techno Babble]]: Satirizes it.
* [[The Force]] (parodied, along with ''[[Star Wars]]'', in "May the Source Be With You.")
* [[The Force]]: Parodied, along with ''[[Star Wars]]'', in "May the Source Be With You."
* [[Twin Threesome Fantasy]] (both Bettys love Captain Quark, but there's a stigma against sleeping with a clone, so since he never knew which one was a clone, he couldn't sleep with either)
* [[Twin Threesome Fantasy]]: Both Bettys love Captain Quark, but there's a stigma against sleeping with a clone, so since he never knew which one was a clone, he couldn't sleep with either of them.
* [[Science Marches On]] (see above, re: sending a telegram. In the 23rd century.)
* [[Science Marches On]]: See above, re: sending a telegram. In the 23rd century.
** Despite the fact that "telegram" is an archaic term, the general principle of keeping messages short to save on costs is one that will probably be with us for many centuries to come. Today, in the early 21st century, users of cell phones typically keep text messages as short as possible so as to fall under their calling plan's texting limit, to the point of using standard abbreviations. The cost per bit of sending a transmission across ''interstellar distances'' would have to be enormous.
** Despite the fact that "telegram" is an archaic term, the general principle of keeping messages short to save on costs is one that will probably be with us for many centuries to come. Today, in the early 21st century, users of cell phones typically keep text messages as short as possible so as to fall under their calling plan's texting limit, to the point of using standard abbreviations. The cost per bit of sending a transmission across ''interstellar distances'' would have to be enormous.
* [[Single-Minded Twins]] (the Bettys often said the same thing at the same time)
* [[Single-Minded Twins]]: The Bettys often said the same thing at the same time.
* [[Small Annoying Creature]] (Ergo, Quark's pet, a one-eyed blob)
* [[Small Annoying Creature]]: Ergo, Quark's pet, a one-eyed blob.
* [[Split Personality]] (Gene/Jean)
* [[Split Personality]]: Gene/Jean.
* [[Suspiciously Similar Substitute]] (Ficus wasn't in the pilot - a Dr. O.B. Mudd, a crotchety one-eyed man, was. He was never seen or mentioned afterwards, though.)
* [[Suspiciously Similar Substitute]]: Ficus wasn't in the pilot - a Dr. O.B. Mudd, a crotchety one-eyed man, was. He was never seen or mentioned afterwards, though.
* [[That's No Moon]]:
* [[That's No Moon]]:
{{quote|'''High Gorgon''': I suggest you take a closer look at my space ship.
{{quote|'''High Gorgon''': I suggest you take a closer look at my space ship.
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'''High Gorgon''': That is my space ship!
'''High Gorgon''': That is my space ship!
'''Leader of the Spartans''': ''(pause)'' Just give us a few minutes to move our things out of the palace. }}
'''Leader of the Spartans''': ''(pause)'' Just give us a few minutes to move our things out of the palace. }}
* [[The Unintelligible]] (Dink spoke only with xylophone beeps)
* [[The Unintelligible]]: Dink spoke only with xylophone beeps.
* [[Tin Can Robot]] (Andy)
* [[Tin Can Robot]]: Andy.
* [[You Mean "Xmas"]] (Christmas has become "Holiday Number 11")
* [[You Mean "Xmas"]]: Christmas has become "Holiday Number 11".


{{reflist}}
{{reflist}}
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:TV Series]]
[[Category:Speculative Fiction Series]]
[[Category:Speculative Fiction Series]]
[[Category:Fantastic Comedy]]
[[Category:Fantastic Comedy]]
[[Category:American Series]]
[[Category:American Series]]
[[Category:Quark]]
[[Category:Live-Action TV of the 1970s]]

Latest revision as of 20:21, 26 January 2024

Quark: They're chasing us? Ficus, who are they?
Ficus: Well, commander, there are three possibilities. Either they are the dreaded Gorgons, in which we'll probably all be killed, or they're the allies of the dreaded Gorgons-
Quark: Ficus, I don't have time for long lists!
Ficus: -in which case we'll probably also be killed.
Quark: Ficus, what you're saying is that all possibilities end in our death.

—"All the Emperor's Quasi-Norms, Part 1"

Not a Ferengi bartender, nor a subatomic particle, but a 1977 sci-fi parody of Star Trek from Get Smart co-creator Buck Henry. Quark was basically the US version of Red Dwarf, only eleven years earlier and with only eight episodes.

The show was set on the United Galaxies Sanitation Patrol Cruiser, a garbage scow working for the United Galaxies Space Station Perma 1. It regularly satirized Star Trek, Star Wars, 2001: A Space Odyssey, and Flash Gordon. The characters were:

Tropes used in Quark include:

"People of Spartan, this is the High Gorgon. I command your unconditional surrender. You shall be treated with compassion, honor and patience. You have twenty seconds before I blow you out of the galaxy."

  • Techno Babble: Satirizes it.
  • The Force: Parodied, along with Star Wars, in "May the Source Be With You."
  • Twin Threesome Fantasy: Both Bettys love Captain Quark, but there's a stigma against sleeping with a clone, so since he never knew which one was a clone, he couldn't sleep with either of them.
  • Science Marches On: See above, re: sending a telegram. In the 23rd century.
    • Despite the fact that "telegram" is an archaic term, the general principle of keeping messages short to save on costs is one that will probably be with us for many centuries to come. Today, in the early 21st century, users of cell phones typically keep text messages as short as possible so as to fall under their calling plan's texting limit, to the point of using standard abbreviations. The cost per bit of sending a transmission across interstellar distances would have to be enormous.
  • Single-Minded Twins: The Bettys often said the same thing at the same time.
  • Small Annoying Creature: Ergo, Quark's pet, a one-eyed blob.
  • Split Personality: Gene/Jean.
  • Suspiciously Similar Substitute: Ficus wasn't in the pilot - a Dr. O.B. Mudd, a crotchety one-eyed man, was. He was never seen or mentioned afterwards, though.
  • That's No Moon:

High Gorgon: I suggest you take a closer look at my space ship.
Leader of the Spartans: A ship? We see no ship. All I see is a large maroon planet.
High Gorgon: That is my space ship!
Leader of the Spartans: (pause) Just give us a few minutes to move our things out of the palace.