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"I never really believed in things like Aliens, Espers, or Time Travellers.
My life has always been pretty straightforward, I guess.

Haroohee is a fagget an Abridged Series of the Haruhi Suzumiya anime done by MyToasterIsRetarded. It uses absurd situations, vulgar jokes and psychedelic editing to show how crazy Kyon's world becomes. Available here.

Tropes used in Haroohee include:
  • An Aesop / Script Wank: Played for laughs in the skit for HAROOHEE 11 PREVIEW. The creator is busy finishing the edits for episode 11 of the abridged series, when his laptop's logic board fails. After an stunned reaction and an angry punch to its screen, he gets another laptop at Best Buy and is able to transfer its hard drive data to the new computer. In the end credits:

"Now remember, kids, always be sure to backup your important data in case your laptop decides to fucking DIE ON YOU!!! FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!!!"

Kyon: Is it true that you only talk to aliens?
Haruhu: No.
Kyon: Or espers?
Haruhu: No.
Kyon: Or time travellers?
Haruhu: No.
Kyon: Huh.
Haruhi: Hey! What does it matter, huh? I only talk to time travellers, aliens and espers!
Kyon: Then why are you talking to me?
Haruhi: (screaming in her head) FuuuuuuuuuuUUUUK!

Haruhi: We need a computer. Not just for porn!
(Kyon clears his throat)
Haruhi: But so we can kickstart this club!
Kyon: (narrating) And as Haruhi said that, I thought tha-
(Haruhi pulls Kyon's collar to her)
Haruhi: Hey, let's go over to the computer lab and take- I mean, borrow one of theirs!
Kyon: What, you think they're just gonna GIVE ONE TO YOU?!
Haruhi: Oh, I have my way of handling things.

  • (At this point, you'd expect the usual scene of Haruhi blackmailing the computer club, but...)

(At the computer lab)
Haruhi: Hey, can we get one of your computers?
Computer guy: OKAY!

  • Black Comedy Rape: In Ep. 2, after the whole incident with Haruhi and Mikuru being detained by teachers who thought they were hookers:

Taniguchi: (to Kyon) Hey! So Kyon, Haruhi pulled up quite the show the other day. Everyone's talking about you guys.
Ryoko: I'm sure your club's got quite a lot of attention because of it.
Kyon: Oh hey, Ryoka. And no, not really. You'd be surprised at how little attention is given to Japanese schoolgirls being molested by older men. It's uncanny.
Ryoko: I know. Why, I get molested all the time. (Waves papers she's holding) And I got the documents to prove it. (Makes loud noise with them)

(At Yuki's appartment)
Kyon: So uh, what exactly is it that you wanted?
Yuki: I would like to rape you.
Kyon: Uh, what?
Yuki: I'm just kidding. People joke with one another that way, do they not?
Kyon: Uh, yeah, I guess so. So are you the only one who lives here?
(Beat. Yuki serves tea to Kyon without a word.)
Yuki: Yes. Drink.
(Kyon does so.)
Kyon: (thinking) Skeptical!
Yuki: Ha.
Kyon: Huh.
Yuki: You have swallowed the roofie. Now, I will do things of a sexual nature to your unconscious body.
Yuki: I'm just kidding. People joke with one another that way, do they not?

Kyon: Oh, I feel really.. dizzy.
(He collapses to the floor)
Yuki: The roofie has kicked in.

  • (Ep. 3) After all of Yuki's exposition:

Yuki: I'm gonna need a cigarette after all that.
Kyon: Dude, I don't even- Is this all just some elaborate plan to have sex with me, or..?
Yuki: You mean again?
Kyon: ........What?

  • Blatant Lies: (Ep. 9) The Butler says the host is busy with his "bathroom blitz", even as we hear his murder screams and him saying "That was really sharp and also painful, I am dead now. (fart)"

The Butler: He actually told me to tell you that.

  • Buffy-Speak: As Koizumi puts it in Ep. 10, the host has been murdered using "a stabby-like object."
  • Camera Abuse In Ep. 1:

(While the camera quickly moves to Haruhi's face)
Kyon: (narrating) There stood this beautiful girl who-
Haruhi: OW! FUCK ME!
Kyon: Changed my life as I knew it.

Haruhi: (background falsetto voice) Just as I thought. This is water.

Yuki: So to put it in terms that would befit, Harihu Suzumiya and I are not normal human beings.
Kyon: I knew it! She's a bitch, isn't she?
Yuki: Yes, but that's not what I mean.


Yuki: My mission is to observe- I mean spy on naked in the shower- I mean observe Haruhi Suzumiya and report back to the Data Integration Thought Entity.
All of the sexy- I mean helpful details.

Haruhi: The mysterious transfer student is finally here! Excitemeeeeeeeeeeeent!
Kyon: (in between Haruhi) Isn't it a little early for you to be LOUD AND OBNOXIOUS?!

Kyon: (narrating) As I was nodding nearly napping Suddenly there came a tapping ON THE BACK OF MY FUCKING SKULL!
Kyon: (shouting to Haruhi) What the hell?!
Haruhi: New idea! I'll just start my own club!
Kyon: You don't say.
Haruhi: Yeah, and I thought of it all by myself!
Kyon: (thinking) You lying motherfuck!

 "I'm Haruhi Suzumiya, and I probably hate all of you."

  • Heh Heh, You Said "X": Subverted in Ep. 9. When the Butler says he can't find Mr Keichi, who was "emptying his bowels" in the bathroom (or his bedroom):

Haruhi: Bullshit!
Kyon: Haa, I don't get it.

Kyon: So Haruhi, is it true that you like to FLIP YOUR HAIR?!
Haruhi: (while she does so) I have no idea what you're talking about.

  • Jump Scare: (In-Universe) In Ep. 1, Taniguchi and Ryoko scare Kyon, who gets really pissed off.
  • Limited Animation (Ep. 9) Parodied and discussed with the flip-flaps. As Koizumi discusses the fact that because, from the perspective of the camera, he is obstructing his friends (and their mouths), he moves just enough for Kyon's sister to mock the concept (she is free to make stupid sounds with her mouth, since the camera can see her), until Koizumi move back to his original place, shutting her up.
  • Larynx Dissonance: Haruhi is sometimes voiced by a falsetto male voice. Some characters and most of the background voices are delivered in the same way.
  • The Other Darrin: (Ep. 9) Mikuru, discussed by Kyon/the creator In-Universe.
    • In episode 4, Haruhi was voiced by Sydsnap, temporarily replacing the main voice actress (MewVenus) who was unavailable at the time.
    • Conversed in Ep. 10. After Haruhi and Kyon leave to investigate:

Mikuru: (male voice) Hey! We're important characters!
Yuki: Coming from the person whose voice changed, like, five times.
Mikuru: Your voice changed too, you saucy motherfucker.
Yuki: No idea what you're talking about, you wet noodle.
Kyon's sister: (low male voice) As Kyon's sister, I must say, this is indeed an outrage.

Kyon: (narrating) Over the next few days, I learned more about Miss Suzumiya, mostly through what Tanaguchi's told me and uh, a little stalking on my own behalf.
That's not weird or anything, is it? Is it? Naah, I didn't think so.

Kyon: (narrating) So the next day, we were assigned new seats at random, and I was hoping for the seat near the window in case I decided to KILL MYSELF!!!
And Haruhi was sitting direcly behind me, so that was looking like a pretty good option.
Haruhi: It's so boring around here, you know? I'm tempted to jump out a window.
Kyon: (thinking) Oblige me, O mighty temptress.

"Okay, so you saw that this video is thirteen minutes, and- and- and yet, you're still- you clicked on it. You- You're gonna watch it. You're gonna watch this fuckin' thirteen minutes of fuckin' anime bullshit. What is WRONG WITH YOU?! WHHHHYY ARE YOU WASTING YOUR LIFE AWAY?!!"

Haruhi: This is our new room. This is where things start getting interesting.
(Kyon facepalms and sighs.)
Kyon: (thinking) I have to take the biggest crap!

  • In Ep. 10, the host struggles to keep his farts:

Host (upstairs): (farts) Ho-ho-holy shit, that was loud. ..I mean nothing, I'm dead.
Kyon: Heh heh, he's not really too good at the "not-being-dead" thing.

  • Vomit Discretion Shot: Played for laughs in Ep. 10. Koizumi, at the sight of the dead host, vomits right into the carpet. Kyon is pretty disgusted by this.
  • When It Rains, It Pours: In Ep. 10, while Haruhi and Kyon investigate outside during a downpour: