Gutterballs

• Main
• YMMV
• Quotes
• Wikipedia
• All Subpages
• Create New

Hypothetical: What if Frank Zito hated bowling instead of women?

Heads will bowl.

Joey: Hey, shit nuts. Your fucking waxer ruined my ball. It's yours now. I want a new one. Egerton: Alright, first of all, shit-for brains, that area's being remodeled. You ain't even supposed to be over there. And secondly, you're a fucking dip shit. It looks to me like you just pressed down too goddamned hard. You're supposed to let that machine do all the work. I don't see it as a malfunction at the junction boy. Joey: Maybe you should open your fucking eyes then, idiot. There's one inch of sharp screw embedded in the bottom. It's fucked. End of story. Now go get me a new fucking ball. Egerton: Use one of the balls by your lane. Joey: Those balls are shitty and used, just like your fucking underwear. Now go get me a goddamned new ball! Egerton: Hey, calm down now. Don't get your panties in a bunch. Now you be a good boy and go back over to your lane and maybe I'll go over to the store and get you something brand-spanking new. If you're lucky. Joey: Lucky? You wanna talk about luck? You're fucking lucky the toilet wouldn't flush when your mom spread her legs and pulled you out with a goddamned coat hanger! Egerton: You're lucky the buffalo beat me over the fence, otherwise I'd be your daddy! —Typical Dialogue

Gutterballs is a 2008 exploitation/slasher film.

It's late night at the Xcalibur bowling center and tensions are running high between two rival teams; one lead by the nasty Steve, and the other featuring a girl named Lisa and her friends.

Following a brawl, the teams are kicked out with the janitor telling everyone they can resume their game tomorrow. Lisa goes back into the bowling alley alone to retrieve her purse, and is the victim of a vicious gang-rape at the hands of Steve and his cronies.

The next night, a masked killer starts to dispatch all parties at the bowling alley, with his kills being counted on the scoreboard as strikes under the name "BBK".

---

This film provides examples of the following tropes:

• Eighties Hair
• Abandoned Area: The ball polisher area.
• Agony of the Feet: Lisa breaks up the fight by throwing a bowling ball onto Steve's foot.
• A Lady On Each Arm: Steve, when he shows up with Hannah and Julia.
• Almighty Janitor: Egerton.
• Anachronism Stew: Cell phones being brought up, and one of the games in the arcade being from The Nineties.
• Anguished Declaration of Love: Patrick, to Lisa.
• Ankle Drag: Happens to Sam.
• And Starring: And Dan Ellis as BBK.
• Annoying Laugh: AJ.
• Apologetic Attacker: Patrick, when forced to violate Lisa with a bowling pin.
• Armed Legs: Cindy is garroted with the laces of a pair of bowling shoes.
• Asshole Victim
• Ass Shove: Steve is sodomized with a sharpened bowling pin.
• The Atoner: Patrick.
• Ax Crazy: Egerton.
• The Bartender: Egerton.
• Bathroom Stall Graffiti
• Bigger Is Better in Bed:

Ben: (while looking over the condom machine) "How about Black Knight? 'For the Big One?' That's for big black cock, that's gonna fall off me for sure."

• Bi the Way: Julia ("She's pretty hot, do you think she's into girls?")
• Black Bra and Panties: Julia.
• Black Comedy
• Blood From the Mouth
• Boom Headshot: Egerton's death.
• Bowling for Ratings
• Calling Your Orgasms: Joey.
• Camping a Crapper: Julia, Dave, Sam, and Ben.
• Camp Straight: Dave.
• Camera Abuse: When Patrick's throat is slit.
• Canada Eh
• Can You Hear Me Now:

Sarah: "Batteries are dead, Jamie, don't you think that's the first thing I would have done?" Jamie: "Fuck! How convenient..."

• Cast As a Mask: Brandon Dix and Ryan Nicholson both subbed for BBK.
• Cat Fight: Lisa and Sarah.
• Cell Phone: Rather superfluous reference to one, despite the supposed eighties setting.
• Chase Scene
• Chekhov's Gun: Sam's switchblade, and Egerton's shotgun.
• Closed Circle
• Cluster F Bomb: Much of the dialogue, to the point of being the unnoficial second place record holder for most of amount of "fucks" in a film, directly behind Mutilation Mile and barely ahead of August Underground's Mordum. Observe.
• Collared By Fashion
• Cool Mask: It's a bowling bag that looks like it has a weird face on it.
• Cool Shades: Lisa wears them after the gang rape.
• Country Matters
• Creepy Basement
• Cruel and Unusual Death: AJ has his face dunked in the malfunctioning Wax-O-Matic, leaving nothing but a bloody crater. And let's not even get started on Julia and Dave's death by 69ing.
• Crusty Caretaker: Egerton.
• Cue the Sun
• Cut His Heart Out With a Spoon
• Cut Phone Lines
• Daylight Horror: The finale.
• Death By Mocking
• Death By Sex
• Defiant to The End: Steve.

"... I still fucked her... I still... I still... I stilll... I... I still... fucked her."

• Developing Doomed Characters
• Development Hell: Gutterballs 2: Balls Deep, which will apparently be set in a waterpark.
• The Ditz: Julia and Hannah, and apparently Lisa.
• Dramatic Unmask: Patrick is also BBK.
• Drunken Master: "Yep, you do bowl better drunk."
• Dumb Blonde: Julia and Hannah.
• Dwindling Party
• The Eighties
• Even Evil Has Standards: Joey and AJ are a bit weirded out by Steve's idea of raping Lisa with a bowling pin, and even moreso when he threatens to do the same to the uncooperative Patrick.
• Evil Cripple: Steve, after his foot is mangled.
• Evil Is Hammy: Egerton.
• Eye Scream: Ben gets a sharpened bowling pin in the eyes.
• Facial Horror: AJ losing his face to the Wax-O-Matic, and Steve having his beat in with a bowling pin.
• Faking the Dead: Patrick.
• Fan Disservice
• Fan Service
• Fight Scene
• Final Girl: Sarah.
• Fingerless Gloves
• Flash Back: A rather gratuitous one to the gang rape, and then one to Patrick faking his death.
• Flipping the Bird
• Fluffy Fashion Feathers: Sam.
• Funny Afro: Jamie.
• Gang of Bullies: Steve, AJ, Joey, and Patrick.
• Girl On Girl Is Hot:

Joey: (on the absent Julia and Hannah) "They're probably licking each other clean!" AJ: (near Spit Take)

• Gender Blender Name: Of course the transsexual character would be named Sam.
• Going Commando: Lisa.
• Gorn
• Grievous Bottley Harm: During the brawl, Steve smashes Jamie with a beer bottle.
• Groin Attack: Lisa getting violated with the bowling pin, and BBK giving Sam a "mangina" by cutting her penis in half.
• Gross Up Close Up
• Gutted Like a Fish: Lisa sustaining a shotgun blast to the stomach results in this.
• Hacked By a Pirate: A skull and crossbones shows up on the scoreboard after every one of BBK's kills.
• Hand in The Hole: Jamie, right before Joey's head shoots out of the ball return.
• He Knows Too Much: "Jamie, Jamie, Jamie. Now, c'mon, be a good boy and move aside, you know the drill, son. She seen me, she got to go."
• High Pressure Blood: Patrick's throat slitting.
• Hoist By His Own Petard: Egerton and Lisa are killed with Egerton's own shotgun.
• Hollywood Healing: It's unlikely Lisa would be up and about a day after what happened to her.
• The Hyena: AJ, who is even described as such.
• I Love the Dead: Ben is found with two used condoms in his eye sockets. It's probably best to not think about what went on there.
• Impairment Shot
• Improbable Weapon User: BBK's main weapons are a sharpened and regular bowling pins, the former kept in holsters.
• Improvised Weapon: Hannah is killed with bowling balls.
• It Is Pronounced Tro PAY: Edge-erton, not Egg-erton.
• Jerkass: Team Steve.
• Jerk Jock: AJ.
• Keep Circulating the Tapes: The original version, with various eighties songs that were removed from later releases.
• Kick Them While They Are Down
• Kill Em All
• Knife Nut: BBK gets a switchblade from Sam.
• Knight Templar Parent: Egerton decides his daughter's rapists don't just deserve to die, but her teammates as well, since they "let" the gang rape happen.
• Large Ham: Steve.
• Leave the Camera Running: The gang rape goes on for eight minutes.
• Lock and Load Montage
• The Long List: The special thanks crawl in the credits is over a minute in length.
• Male Frontal Nudity: Dicks. Dicks everywhere.
• Malevolent Masked Men
• Monochrome Past
• Motive Rant
• Nerd Glasses: Patrick, who is constantly adjusting them.
• Nice Hat: Ben and Dave.
• Oblivious Janitor Cut: Egerton is unable to hear Lisa being gang raped due to his headphones and floor polisher.
• Off With His Head: Joey and Egerton's deaths.
• One Word Title
• Opposing Sports Team
• Out With a Bang: BBK holds Julia and Dave's heads into each others genitals while they are 69ing, causing them to eventually asphyxiate.
• Overdrawn At the Blood Bank: Patrick's throat slitting.
• Paint the Town Red: The finale.
• Panty Shot: Subverted, in that Lisa had no underwear on.
• Peek a Boo Corpse: Joey's severed head is shot out of the ball return.
• The Peeping Tom: AJ.
• Please I Will Do Anything: While Sam is being attacked by BBK.
• Poke the Poodle: After an argument with Egerton, Joey snaps one of his pencils in half.
• Quick Nip: Steve.
• Rape and Revenge
• Rape and Switch: Cruelly implied by Steve about Lisa.
• Rape As Drama
• Raven Hair Ivory Skin: Lisa, Sarah, and Cindy.
• Real Men Wear Pink: Despite their machoness, Joey and AJ rock bright pink shirts. This is commented on by the Wax-O-Matic.
• Red Shirt: Julia and Hannah.
• The Reveal: There are several BBKs, but the main one is Egerton, who is Lisa's father. Lisa killed Steve, while he killed everyone else except Joey and AJ, who were killed by Patrick, who Egerton had recruited to help him after he told him about his involvement in the gang rape, intending on going to the police afterward. Lisa and Jamie (who was aware of what was going on, but did not participate in the murders) were oblivious to Patrick's involvement, and Egerton killing their teammates, who he also blamed for his daughter's gang rape, since they let her go back in the bowling alley alone.
• Running Gag: Steve never gets his beer.
• Serious Business: Bowling.
• Shirtless Scene: Joey.
• Sinister Shades: Joey; during the gang rape, he takes them off, takes off his shirt, then puts them back on.
• Sir Swearsalot: Everyone.
• Slashed Throat: Patrick's death.
• Slasher Smile: Egerton during The Reveal.
• Slobs Versus Snobs
• Sound Only Death: With all the BBKs dead, Jamie and Sarah leave the alley. Once outside, Sarah turns the shotgun on Jamie, and we hear a shot just as the films cuts to black.
• Spank the Cutie: BBK to Julia, after killing her.
• Spiky Hair: Steve and Cindy.
• Spiteful Spit: Lisa, on the dying Patrick.
• Stocking Filler
• Sunglasses At Night: Joey and Lisa.
• Take Me Out At the Ball Game
• Take That Kiss: Egerton, to Patrick.
• Thing O Matic: Wax-O-Matic.
• Three Way Sex: Julia mentions she sometimes joins in on Steve and Hannah.
• Title In: The Next Night.
• Token Good Teammate: Patrick.
• Token Minority: Jamie.
• Too Many Belts: Sarah.
• Too Much Information: "I wish I could go commando, but I have to wait until the operation."
• Transsexual: Sam.
• Unhand Them Villain
• Unusually Uninteresting Sight: The talking Wax-O-Matic.
• Victoria's Secret Compartment: Sam and her switchblade.
• Video Arcade: With the gang rape starting on the pinball machine, of course.
• Weird Moon: It's always full.
• We Used to Be Friends: Steve and Jamie.
• When I Was Your Age:

Egerton: "Hey, let me tell you something, boy. Now, back in my day, we-" AJ: "Ugh, fuck!" Egerton: Yeah, yeah, yeah, look, back in my day, we kept a score card. Now we had to write everything down methodically. Same with the pins. That pin setter? That used to be a person. Flesh and bone, not a machine. Automation long since took over everything, though."

• Who Wears Short Shorts
• World of Ham
• Xtreme Kool Letterz: Xcalibur Bowling Centre.
• You Have Outlived Your Usefulness: Patrick.
• Your Cheating Heart: Lisa and Steve were a couple, though it turned out Lisa was only with Steve to get to Jamie, who she had sex with at the prom, which Steve took her to.
• Your Head Asplode: Hannah has her head crushed between two bowling balls, while Egerton has his blown off with a shotgun.
• Your Mom
• You Said You Would Let Them Go: Patrick gives the "I thought we were just going to scare her!" variant during the gang rape.