Life with Lamarr

Contains sex, drugs, emotions, swearing, lulz, science and headcrabs!

Life with Lamarr is a Fan Web Comic by Co Fiori-McPhee taking place in an alternate Half-Life universe in which Dr. Kleiner and Barney Calhoun are room-mates, Eli is a hippy, Magnusson went crazy and controls an army of headcrabs and Dr. Breen despite being Administrator of Earth still has time to chase up late rent payments.

Spread over 5 "Books":

The Headcrab King (Episodes 1 - 24^{[dead link]})
The Free Children's Commune (Episodes 25^{[dead link]} - 60)
Land Sakes (Episodes 61^{[dead link]} - 101^{[dead link]})
The House of Longfigger (Episodes 102^{[dead link]} - 195^{[dead link]})
El Headcrab Gigante (Episodes 196 - onwards)

Tropes used in Life with Lamarr include:

A Date with Rosie Palms:
- Magnusson in the Christmas Episode.
- This One in Naughty Vorti.
Absent-Minded Professor: Dr. Kleiner.
Alien Lunch: Played with..
Amazing Freaking Grace: Cubbage and This One preform it at Lamarr's funeral.
- However the actual recording was the author's father.
Amusing Alien: Lamarr and This One.
Asshole Victim: Ned Land.
Author Avatar: In a Breaking the Fourth Wall episode Co Fiori-McPhee appears as himself when the "filming" of the episode is interrupted revealing himself as an In-Universe director.
Ax Crazy: Earl is a fairly nice guy most of the time. But, as shown here^{[dead link]}, it doesn't take much to set off his Berserk Button.
B-Side Comics: Cubbage & This One Sunday Comix.
Bawdy Song: The Cactus sings one.
Berserk Button:
- Earl when someone insults Roderick.
- NEVER mention anything about Schnorbert's nose unless you have deathwish...
Bi the Way: Barney.
Brain Bleach: The Citizens' reaction to seeing this.
Breaking the Fourth Wall
Bring My Brown Pants: “It’s a little late for that Doc!”
Butt Monkey: Barney when the occasion calls for it.
Came Back Wrong: That One.

"We remember Black Mesa... But we have forgotten how to do math... Blurrrrrrr..."

Caught with Your Pants Down: This One.
Converse with the Unconscious: Alyx to Gordon Freeman.
Dead All Along: Inverted with Ned Land, who turns out to have actually been alive the whole time. At least, until he presses Earl's Berserk Button...
Disintegrator Ray: Magnusson's Neek Ray, which he later fits into his pet T-Rex's eye sockets.
Driven to Suicide: Roderick Thanatos when faced with the prospect of being with Earl for the rest of his life^{[dead link]}.
Drunken Song: Dr. Breen sings one, however it's not the song that gives it away, it's the fact he's singing at all. Also he isn't drunk, he's high.
Dude, He's Like, In A Coma!: Gordon Freeman is in a coma and Alyx has started a relationship with him.
Easy Amnesia: Subverted- Dr. Kleiner automatically assumes that it will happen after Breen hits his head, but is quickly proven wrong.
Everybody Must Get Stoned: The plot of Book Two: The Free Children's Commune.
Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": The Cactus, because well, he's a Cactus.
Expository Theme Tune: The "Cubbage & This One" theme. Subverted in that its description of the show is wrong.
Face Doodling: Usually happens to Barney, when he's passed out from drinking.
Feathered Fiend: Baron von Tailfeathers, according to Peter Orniphobe at least.
Flash Back: Used alongside Flashback Cuts.
Flashback Cut: Used in various episodes.
Fluffy the Terrible: Magnusson's pet T-Rex is named Mr. Nibbles and his Ninja Fast Headcrab is named Noodles.
Fourth Wall Mail Slot: Previously, Breenmail.
Gag Penis: Eli^{[dead link]}.
Generic Name: The Vortigaunts all seem to have them: This One, That One and Little One.
Good Angel, Bad Angel: Barney has a pair.
He's Just Hiding: The usual reaction whenever a canon character is supposedly killed off. Non-canon characters on the other hand...
He Knows Too Much: Kleiner thinks it wise for him and Barney to get out of City 17 because the broadcast revealing that Mossman is Breen's mother only aired inside the Citadel because the broadcasting was down due to a system reboot meaning Kleiner and Barney are one of the few people who know the secret.
Hypocritical Humor: Barney has a tendency towards it.
I'm a Humanitarian: Gordon, who (although under the influence of drugs at the time) ate off Eli's leg...and wang.
Infallible Babble: Played with when Barney mentions that the Vorts are rumoured to be able to preform resurrections and Kleiner argues that it must be true because it's a rumour. It is played with because in an earlier comic This One had already confirmed that they can preform resurrections, it's just Barney and Kleiner had never had it confirmed to them.
Intercontinuity Crossover: When NSFW Comix's Cuthwald was assumed dead he started appearing in City 17. When Cuthwald was revealed to have been alive NSFW Comix had a comic where Manly Man was reading a newspaper dismissing Cuthwald sightings in City 17.
Interspecies Romance:
- Whilst high on Pez, Kleiner starts to come onto Lamarr (although granted, to him she looked like Lara Croft).
- In Book Three, Lamarr has a fling with a Houndeye.
Killed Off for Real: Word of God says that yes, Roderick is DEFINITELY dead. And nothing will bring him back.
Kissing Under the Influence: Breen and Mossman (who isn't under the influence), actually they do more than kissing, which later becomes Squick when it is later revealed that Mossman was Breen's Mother.
Lovable Sex Maniac: Dr Kleiner.
Love Triangle: In Book Three with Kleiner, Barney and Mel.
Luke, I Am Your Father: Mossman is Dr. Breen's mother.
Luke, I Might Be Your Father: Dr. Kleiner might be Alyx's father, however her mother "took rather a lot of lovers".
Mauve Shirt: Sunbeam, an ex-combine elite who is a member of the Free Children's Commune. Turns out to have been The Mole the whole time when he remembers his original mission and aids Breen with massacring the entire commune. Shortly afterwords, he suffers a Karmic Death when Barney runs him over during his escape from White Forest.
Meaningful Name: Earl Beathan, Roderick Thanatos, X. Ben Dibble-Redshirt and Peter Orniphobe.
- Beathan derived from Scottish Gaelic beatha meaning "life" and Thanatos being the Greek name for the personification of death. Earl carries around the corpse of Roderick because of the belief that he is still alive.
No Name Given: The Cactus, sort of, while it is never mentioned in the comic the author says his name is Timothy.
Not So Harmless: It's easy to not take Dr Breen very seriously at first. However, after he orders the mass slaughter of the Free Children's Commune he quickly reminds everyone exactly WHY he's the Big Bad in the first place.
Of Corpse He's Alive: Earl Beathan does this to Roderick, however considering Roderick is decayed no one is buying it, except Earl who believes Roderick is actually alive.
Only One Name: See above in No Name Given.
Parental Incest: Mossman and Dr. Breen.
Parody Episode: Making up is Easy to - WTF?! is a parody of the Kanye West incident and a 4th wall breaker.
Porn Stash: Barney has one which was found by Alyx, which he is subsequently blackmailed with because it lacked women.
Posthumous Character: Roderick Thanatos.
Prophecies Are Always Right: That One makes a prophecy about the upcoming events^{[dead link]} in exchange for a melon.
Punny Name: Hugh Chube.
Quest for Identity: Dr. Breen.
Red Shirt: X. Ben Dibble-Redshirt.
Right Behind Me: Happens to a citizen who sings a rather... unflattering song about Breen aften he’s eaten by Mr Nibbles, even failing to notice the others running off (including his keyboardist)!
Romancing the Widow: Kleiner and Barney both try this with Mel.
Self-Serving Memory: Retconed in via Word of God to explain differences between Magnusson's flackback in Book One and Mr. Nosedive's retelling of the same events in Book Four.
Sharing a Body: Magnusson and Herbert.
Shoot the Messenger: Breen has a tendency to "ax" his messengers a favour if they ever bring him unfortunate news.
Shout-Out:
- In Episode 65^{[dead link]}.

Barney: "No! I'm from the twenty-first century!"
Fisher: "I make the obscure reference gags in these parts! Sic him, Jango!"

- To one of the author's other creations, Pingu Parody Party, in the form of a man dressed as Pingu who is being hunted by a man named Hugh Chube for copyright violation.
"Shut Up" Kiss: Barney does this to Kleiner, here.
Stock British Phrases: Cubbage.
Stop Helping Me!: Kleiner's 'helpful advice' is what drove Magnusson insane.
Suspiciously Specific Denial: “[… I’ve recorded over six hours of you and Mossman engaging in intercourse which I am certainly not going to sell on the internet! And even if I did, I most definitely would not view it for my own personal entertainment!”]
Taking You with Me: Mr. Nosedive uses this to prevent Mossman killing him.
Team Pet: Lamarr.
The Internet Is for Porn: As Longfigger learns when she re-activates the internet^{[dead link]}, much to Mossman's annoyance.
Third Person Person: The Vortigaunts, and considering their verbose way of speaking it's hard for This One to avoid this trope.
Tonight Someone Dies: Invoked via Word of God and an in-universe prophecy.
Trick Bomb: The H-Bomb which will cause every living in the blast radius to become permanently stoned and anyone with 500 kilometres of the epicenter to get serious munchies.
Unexplained Recovery: Dr. Breen, twice.
Unsound Effect: tl;dr
Webcomic Time: Particularly noticeable in Book Four which takes place over a couple of days but was released over 11 months.
Wham! Episode: Life with Lamarr ~ Book Four Finale Bring tissues...
Whole-Episode Flashback: The How Roderick Came to Be^{[dead link]} arc and The Mossman Files^{[dead link]} arc.
Your Head Asplode: Happens to That One (the Vort with the crowbar in his head). Even the sound effect was "ASPLODE!"