Doctor Who/Recap/S28/E07 The Idiot's Lantern

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.
< Doctor Who‎ | Recap‎ | S28


Goodnight children, everywhere.
The Wire

The Doctor and Rose visit 1953, intending on seeing Elvis perform on The Ed Sullivan Show. The TARDIS takes them to Muswell Hill in North London instead, a day before the Queen's coronation.

The coronation is going to be televised, which has the populace excited. Televisions are at a premium. Luckily, the owner of a local television store, Mr. Magpie, is practically giving them away. That's because it's got a face-eating monster called The Wire (no, not that one) inside. The Wire feeds on energy, specifically on the faces of the people watching her. Mr. Magpie can count on people in The Fifties to keep anyone who's different, such as a faceless family member, tucked carefully away out of sight.

The Doctor sports some marvelous aviator glasses and a 50's hairdo with unequaled resilience to motorcycle helmets, but even that can't keep Rose from getting her face eaten. The Doctor and an abused, neglected kid named Tommy storm the TV store and meet the Wire. Mr. Magpie puts the Wire into a portable TV and runs off put her in the broadcasting tower. The Doctor climbs up after Magpie (masquerading as the King of Belgium to get past the guards) and sort of electrocutes everything. Magpie dissolves, the Wire is trapped in a Betamax tape and everybody gets their faces back. Tommy's bastard of a dad is kicked out of the house by his wife as everyone learns an important lesson about speaking out when things are bad. The Doctor and Rose, however, encourage Tommy to chase after his dad and see if he can't Take a Third Option—because even abusive 1950's fathers are still fathers.

Tropes

The Father: "I AM TALKING!!"
The Doctor: "And I'M NOT LISTENING!!"

  • The Blank: The Wire's victims.
  • Calling the Old Man Out: Eddie Connolly gets the full front of this.
  • Chewing the Scenery: The Wire could stand beside the Captain from The Pirate Planet and Brian Blessed in Mindwarp. Some might even argue she carries the whole episode. You start wondering how she can get so 'HUNGRY!!!' when she's eaten a decent chunk of the scenery...
  • Did Not Do the Research: No, Rose, the flag can be called the Union Jack on land. According to Brittish maritime law (and the law's been around since well before The Fifties when this episode takes place) anybody including Rose, The Doctor and Jack Harkness all the way through The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances, can call it the Union Jack at anytime, anyplace, whenever they bloody well want to. Even if you didn't know that, it still didn't sound right. A person can't call the flag its popular, famous nickname in the privacy of their own home?!
    • To be fair, as she is just acting like some sort of important inspector, she can make up whatever rule sounds right to her, as long as it isn't completely obvious. She's also just taking the opportunity to stick it to a rather pompous and officious little man.
  • Disney Villain Death: Subverted with Magpie. He realises the error of his ways and begs for peace, and The Wire responds by zapping him in cold blood and he falls from Alexandra Burke, but his body turns to dust before he hits the ground.
  • Evil Laugh
  • Expospeak Gag

The Doctor: "I'll use my unrivaled knowledge of trans-temporal extirpation methods to neutralize the residual electronic pattern."
Rose: "You what?"
The Doctor: "I'm gonna tape over it."

  • The Fifties: Just as much of the sexist, Stepfordesque bad as the idyllic, cutesy good.
  • Funny Background Event: When a policeman asks the Doctor to tell them everything he knows the Doctor glibly replies "Well, for starters, I know you can't wrap your hand 'round your elbow and make your fingers meet." One of policemen can be seen trying it in the background.
  • Humiliation Conga: From the moment the Doctor and Rose barge through his door, Eddie Connoly gets nothing but this for the rest of the episode.
  • Madwoman in the Attic: Faceless woman in the attic.
  • The Men in Black
  • Papa Wolf: The Doctor does not take well to Rose's face being stolen.

The Doctor: 'They took her face and just chucked her out and left her in the street? Well, as a result... that makes things simple, very very simple. You know why?
Bishop: No.
The Doctor: Because NOW, Detective Inspector BISHOP, there is no power on this EARTH that can STOP ME.

The Doctor: Hold on a minute. There are three important, brilliant, and complicated reasons why you should listen to me. One- *punched out by The Men in Black*