The Order of the Stick/Characters/The Order of The Stick

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The Order of the Stick

Roy: Let my people handle this, we're trained professionals. Well, we're semi-trained, quasi-professionals, at any rate.

Led by Roy Greenhilt, the Order is a group of six PCs (and two familiars), out to destroy the evil lich Xykon and prevent him from taking over (or worse, destroying) the world.

  • Destructive Saviours
  • Good Counterparts: To the Linear Guild.
  • Five-Man Band: Well, six in this case.
  • Guys Smash, Girls Shoot: Though that is assuming that Vaarsuvius is a girl.
  • Line-of-Sight Name: In response to his teammates' lame attempts at coming up with a name for their group based on ridiculous things (like the fact that they were hired in a tavern, a trait that most adventuring groups share, or that it was a cloudy day), Roy sarcastically suggested they call themselves "the Order of the Stick" because there was a stick on the ground. To his dismay, the name struck a chord with everyone else.
  • Meaningful Name: The above is of course in-story justification from the Prequel. The true reason for the name is, naturally, that they are Stick Figures.
  • Player Characters
  • Player Party
  • Ragtag Bunch of Misfits: Aside from Roy and Durkon, each hero has their own quirk that makes Roy think they're crazy. Belkar indeed is murderously insane. However, giving them a chance works out in his favor.
  • True Companions: Except for Belkar, though it's debatable how little he cares about the other members of the Order of the Stick.
  • With Friends Like These...

Roy Greenhilt

"Is that another 'Fighters are dumb' crack?"

Race: Human
Gender: Male
Class: Fighter
Alignment: Lawful Good

A very intelligent human warrior with an ancestral sword and a serious problem with his unsupportive father ("Powerful mage, Devoted husband, Passable father"), Roy is the leader of the Order of the Stick. Deals with copious amounts of stress daily, often due to somewhat... er... unreliable teammates. Sworn to kill Xykon as part of his father's Blood Oath.

Roy: YOU! BROKE! MY! SWORD!

    • And also:

Roy: Bad guys not remembering their evil deeds is something of a pet peeve of mine.

Roy: THAT'S how I use my Intelligence score in combat, DUMBASS!!!

Roy: There's no way I'm saying goodbye to the Trouser Titan just so I can fool some lame-ass assassins.

Elan: ... You call it the "Trouser Titan?"

Roy: NOT THE POINT!

  • Jerkass: Often, to both friends and enemies, and not always justified. He is called on this several times.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: When he's not busy being a Jerkass.
  • Joke Item: The Bag of Tricks. It's a bag that fires small animals.
  • Knight in Sour Armor
  • The Leader
  • Leeroy Jenkins: He does this occasionally. His charges usually turn out fairly well, though. His ill-fated attack on Xykon isn't an example -- he knows he's outmatched and is as prepared as he reasonably can be.
  • Lethal Joke Item: Roy eventually figures out how to use the Bag of Tricks in combat. It involved using them as a distraction, and finding out that there is a rhino in there. Unfortunately, the rhino kinda backfires on him.

Roy: You know, this bag of tricks isn't so bad once you get the hang of it.

Haley Starshine

"Winning the battle isn't on the table anymore. Surviving the battle is the priority now, and it's slipping away fast."

Race: Human
Gender: Female
Class: Rogue
Alignment: Chaotic Good ...ish

A cute rogue with a motivation for her theft; if she can't come up with enough money, her father faces imprisonment for life. Incredibly neurotic with a very fragmented personality. Currently in a relationship with Elan. By her own admission, "Chaotic Good-ish".

Haley: I think some flaunting is in order.

Haley: Elan... I think I'm in love with y--
Durkon: Cure Critical Wounds!
Haley: ...Ukuleles.

Gannji: Wait, weren't you tied up a moment ago?
Haley: That was a moment ago.

Mistress Shadowgale: Gods, I hate you all.

Haley: I'm gonna sit on this spin until the room stops chairing.


Elan

"♪ Bluff, Bluff, Bluff, Bluff the stupid ogre! ♪"

Race: Human
Gender: Male
Class: Bard/Dashing Swordsman
Alignment: Chaotic Good

A fairly dim but highly charismatic bard with an idiosyncratic thought process and only a slight effect in battle, although the latter has been mitigated after he took his first level in Dashing Swordsman. Can be extremely slow on the uptake.

Haley Starshine: No offense, but you literally can't bluff to save your life. In fact, I think your bluffs usually endanger your life in new and exciting ways.

Nale: But... if you know that then how can you be surprised... Why didn't you realize that thinking I was dead was... I mean... Gah! I'm giving myself a migraine trying to understand the level of wilful ignorance that requires!
Elan: First blood: ELAN!

Elan: Friends, Azurites, countrymen, lend me your ears. Not literally, because ewww. I mean, that would be disgusting.

And messy. And since you'd just be lending them, we'd have to figure out how to reattach them all, and that'd be a lot of work.

Today, we stand here on the wall, preparing to defend this city from the forces of evil. And probably chaos, too.

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers. And sisters. Definitely also sisters, they are part of the band too. I think they play drums.

A day may come when the courage of men (and women) fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day.

And if the battle lasts through tomorrow, it's not that day either.

It may or may not be the day after that, I'm not sure. Still too early to tell.

But in case it's not that day, or it is that day but the battle is already over so it doesn't matter, I want you to remember this:

No one ever won a war by dying for their country. They won by making the other guy die for his country. Which still applies even though hobgoblins don't live in countries.

They live in caves, I think. So make them die for their caves. Which, admittedly, sounds a lot less heroic than dying for your country.

But today will be the day when Azure City declared in one voice, "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight!"

And the fact that it rhymes does not make it any less true!

We'll stand here together and tell our enemies that they may take our lives...

But they will never take our freedom!

(acclaims)

Unless... unless they kill us, then animate the dead corpses as zombies to fight for them. Then I suppose they've taken our lives AND our freedom.

(Beat Panel)

 ♪ Fight, fight, fight, fight the-- ♪

 Random Azurite Soldier: You suck!

Elan: I wonder if I qualify for some sort of hostage-based prestige class by now...

Haley: Am I drunk enough yet that later, I won't remember getting out-logicked by Elan?

Elan: Sir, I'm not about to tell an innkeep I just met about the priceless antique shield Sir Francois carries, or the pouch of rare gems he keeps hidden in his saddlebags, of his purse filled with platinum pieces that he hides in his left boot when he sleeps.

Haley: A secret kind of quest.
Elan: Yeah, we need to find this guy, Girard Draketooth, and tell him that--
Haley: Elan!! What part of "secret" do you not understand?
Elan: The part where I don't tell other people, obviously.

Elan: ... Hey, did anyone else get that foreboding feeling just now?

Nale: We're identical twins, you idiot! You just insulted yourself!
Elan: Really? 'cause you seem to have a couple more holes in you right now.


Vaarsuvius

"I require a reminder as to why raining arcane destruction is not an appropriate response to all of life's indignities. Quickly, please, before they are out of range."

Race: Elf
Gender: Unknown
Class: Wizard (evoker)
Alignment: True Neutral (according to Word of the Giant) }}

An intelligent, if condescending, elf wizard of undefined gender. Extremely skilled in the arcane arts, and likely the most powerful member of the Order. Deeply dislikes Belkar; the feeling is mutual, and the two tend to play near-lethal pranks on one another. Has received a lot of attention during a rather controversial semi-solo arc that resulted in even more alignment confusion and much Character Development.

Vaarsuvius: When I chose Conjuration as my barred school, Teleport was still a Transmutation spell. It's hardly my fault the universal laws have been revised since then!

  • Bad Dreams: Or rather, Bad Trance Memories, complete with the Catapult Nightmare.
  • Badass Bookworm
  • Berserk Button: Do not question Vaarsuvius's magic skills, call V a Warlock, or threaten the elf's family. Gods help you if you threaten the family. In fact, gods help your family and their extended family too.
  • Bob Haircut: From the beginning until the Power Makes Your Hair Grow incident.
  • Break the Haughty: With a lot of salt being rubbed into the wound. Continued in a very literal fashion when V decides to take on Xykon single-handedly.
  • Byronic Hero
  • Calling Your Attacks: Subverted on occasion, as Vaarsuvius has both shouted out spell names for spells not prepared, and produced the effects of a spell without casting; in this case, describing the effect of Sleep put the monsters to sleep.
  • Chain Lightning
  • Charm Person: Suggestion Charm or Dominate spells form part of V's arsenal, and are typically employed if an opponent cannot be blasted with evocations for whatever reason.
  • Crippling Overspecialization: Devoted to arcane knowledge, at the expense of pretty much everything else. This comes up twice in fairly quick succession when facing enemies that not only outclass the elf in magic but can also easily kill V in hand-to-hand combat: the ancient black dragon and Xykon.
  • Deadpan Snarker: Only second to Roy in the snark, and even more deadpan.
  • Deal with the Devil: And is theirs for 44:16.
  • Deus Angst Machina
  • Disintegrator Ray: V likes to disintegrate a lot, notably offing this way the adolescent black dragon, Kubota, and later the ancient black dragon.
  • Disproportionate Retribution: Delivered to V and returned many-fold.
  • Do Not Do This Cool Thing: Admit it, you think Evil V looks cool too when committing mass murder.
  • Dumb Is Good: Vaarsuvius is sometimes condescending towards others simply because of their lesser intelligence, making this an example of the "smart people are mean" part of the trope.
  • Dump Stat: Strength (can only carry one Bag of Holding), Constitution (elf, plus a backstory that involves studying but not jogging), and Charisma (genuinely worried about being capable of apologizing to a friend). Hell, looking at decisions over the course of the comic, Wisdom is looking iffy too. Vaarsuvius' status as master of the dump stat has actually been Lampshaded, when V's singular focus was compared to Roy's extremely wide point spread as in the difference between a hamburger and a roast dinner.
  • Elfeminate
  • Good Counterpart: To Zz'dtri and Pompey.
  • Evil Is Not a Toy: V knows that, but unfortunately choose to ignore it and accepted the IFCC's deal.
  • Evil Makeover: The soul splice; though V wasn't actually affected apart from appearances.
  • Expospeak Gag: V's comedic stock-in-trade.

Vaarsuvius: Fascinating. Durkon, I have just now formulated a theory that encompasses both Nale's likely method of engagement and the most suitable response on our part.
Durkon: THA TREES BE ATTACKIN'!! RUN FER YER LIVES!!!!
Vaarsuvius: Ah, I see you have already grasped the core principles of my theory.

  • Fatal Flaw: Pride in the power of arcane magic, to the point where V's inability to admit to needing help has been a major factor in accepting a Deal with the Devil.
  • Finger-Poke of Doom: "Disintegrate."
  • Flight: With the Overland Flight spell.
  • Functional Magic
  • Glass Cannon; As described under "Dump Stat".
  • Good Hair, Evil Hair: Once the soul splice is completed, V's hair grows quite long and wild. Upon reverting, it's tied up into a ponytail.
  • Hearing Voices: On finishing the soul splice, Vaarsuvius' three "subcontractors" talk a lot amongst themselves and can be heard quite audibly. It's later revealed that they had as much influence over V's actions alignment-wise as cheerleaders.
  • Heroic BSOD
    • Vaarsuvius is being driven insane by guilt over a perceived failure in Azure City, as well as many failures since. As a result, the elf has become completely obsessed with not failing and, by extension, with finally succeeding at something that will prove that V is not a failure.
    • V has a bigger one when on realizing the actual effects of the Familicide spell:not only did V kill all black dragons directly related to the ancient black dragon the spell was initially cast on, but also the entire Draketooth family, who descended from a black dragon, and everybody who the Draketooths had children with, and their families....

Vaarsuvius: (curled on the floor) My fault. I am the cause. It sprang from my brow.

  • Hero with an F In Good: V has had some memorable Nice Job Breaking It, Hero moments.
  • Holding Back the Phlebotinum: Vaarsuvius is usually knocked out of fights quickly to prevent Linear Warriors, Quadratic Wizards from taking play. But when he is able to participate, the fight either ends quickly or is against a powerful opponent with some form of magic resistance.
  • Idiot Ball
    • V got slammed with it in the epic battle versus Xykon, despite having had more than enough sheer power on hand to win if the battle had been fought in an even halfway intelligent manner. Justified Trope due to V's overwhelming power trip and arrogance.
    • Played straight elsewhere. The Oracle all but tells Vaarsuvius that the price for ultimate arcane power would be too high. V only hears that the power sought is coming.
  • Ignored Epiphany: Even if the plan they laid out was unworkable, the fiends make sure that V is aware of the fact that the true motives for accepting their deal were pride and desire for ultimate power, rather than any nobler. Despite this being thrown in V's face, the elf accepts the deal, later learns the lesson, but only after the damage is done.
    • Vaarsuvius also fails to let the team know about the deal out of shame, setting them all up for a future fall if the fiends choose to exercise control before V's death. In this case, V's shame is very much the mirror of V's earlier Pride and proof the V still hasn't learned the lesson completely.
  • Inferiority Superiority Complex: So very much, particularly during the separation arc. During a string of (partially perceived) heavy failures and PTSD to boot, V becomes practically impossible to live with.
  • Insufferable Genius
  • Insult to Rocks: V apologies to the tables of the world for comparing them to Belkar.
  • It's Not You, It's My Enemies: Part of V's reason for not contesting the divorce.
  • Jerkass: Particularly in the fleet/Soul Splice arc. Culminate with him/her threatening to kill Elan.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold
  • Just Eat Him-or-Her: Swallowed once by an owlbear and twice by black dragons...
  • Kick the Dog: If offing Kubota didn't qualify, then taunting the black dragon about her dead son definitely does. And if that's not bad enough, then how about simultaneously committing familicide against every black dragon related to her.
  • Kick the Son of a Bitch: Honestly, Kubota had it coming.
  • Kill It with Fire: Fireball or Scorching Ray are often the first choice of offensive spell.

Vaarsuvius: Burn, you insufferably terse dullard!!

Vaarsuvius thinks "Familicide" is an appropriate response to threatening the children.

  • Kuudere
  • Let Us Never Speak of This Again: The two days spent in the Semi-Elemental Plane of Ranch Dressing after being sent there by Zz'dtri is a story Vaarsuvius would much rather have go untold. Especially in the books.
  • Lethal Joke Item: Doilies.
  • Levitating Lotus Position: Vaarsuvius floats in this position while in a trance to regain spells. Belkar took advantage of this once to play a prank on V.
  • Linear Warriors, Quadratic Wizards
    • By the #600 comic point, V has incredibly powerful magic available, and is the most powerful of the group (by quite a lot) in terms of sheer damage-causing ability. However, this is tempered by V's "barred" schools, and the fact that if V gets too close to the action and gets either knocked out, gagged, paralyzed, transformed (lizard), or runs out of spells, will end up being not really very helpful... which was a causative factor behind a Heroic BSOD. Probably because of what happened in the flashback strip "Running Away". Also subverted by V's arrogance in doing everything personally, rather than working with others. Had V helped the rest of the order rather than seeking personal power, everything would have gone smoother for everyone.
    • Played with and ultimately defied in "Right Tool for the Job". V is up against a character who has tailored their very build to shut down the elf's entire spell list directly, even at its most effective. V gets around this by dominating the mind of an enemy crossbowman (crossbowkobold?), and correctly estimates the physical bolts as a weakness to be exploited. Hence, for all the supreme power V has, victory is achieved by using a ranger's abilities instead.
  • Loves the Sound of Screaming: But only the screams of people that are really hated. For example, forcing the Linear Guild's third kobold Yukyuk to serve as Mr. Scruffy's litter box while he is under mind control, and is very much aware of what's going on; V, as the one controlling him, is the only one who can hear his screams.

Vaarsuvius: His silent screams are a symphony I cannot share.

Vaarsuvius: I have a plan.
Blackwing: Does it involve selling your soul?

Vaarsuvius: Time is at a premium, precluding extended discussion.

Vaarsuvius: Actually, now just [six seconds]. I was being particularly verbose just there.

Vaarsuvius: I may be in error, but I believe the appropriate proclamation is, "Sneak Attack, bitch."

Belkar Bitterleaf

"I AM A SEXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR!"

Race: Halfling
Gender: Male
Class: Ranger/Barbarian
Alignment: Chaotic Evil

Even shorter than other Halflings, Belkar has deep-seated emotional problems. He tries to work these out by killing people he doesn't like, which is to say pretty much everyone. Still, he has some of the best lines and is a major source of (black) comedy.

Belkar: But speaking hypothetically, if I had managed to conceal a Ring of Jumping someplace on my body that I was reasonably certain no one would search...

Belkar: Hey, lemmings are cute.

  • Becoming the Mask: There are hints that Belkar's fake character development is turning into real character development. It becomes very apparent in "Wild Empathy".
  • Berserk Button: It doesn't matter who you are... if you value your head remaining attached to the rest of your body, you should never, ever, EVER threaten to harm Mr. Scruffy in his presence.
  • The Berserker
  • The Big Guy: Shares the role with Durkon (ironically, the two are the smallest humanoid members of the party).
  • Black Comedy
  • Blood Knight
  • But He Sounds Handsome: "That Belkar, as stubborn as he is stone-cold sexy."
  • Chaotic Stupid: Moreso in earlier strips, where he would do things like set a tent on fire just to watch it burn -- when they were trying to sneak into a camp stealthily.
  • Character Development: Faked character development, which ironically is real development for him too.
  • Charlie Brown Baldness
  • Chef of Iron: He has ranks in the Profession (Gourmet chef) skill.
  • Chekhov's Boomerang: The Ring of Jumping +20. First when he uses it to escape from prison in Azure City, and again when he lends it to Roy.
  • Combat Sadomasochist
  • Deadpan Snarker
  • Devil in Plain Sight
  • Does Not Like Shoes: Like all halflings.
  • Dual-Wielding: Two daggers.
  • Dump Stat: Wisdom
    • So much so that that in this early strip, when V buffs Belkar's Wisdom to enable him to use a healing scroll it completely changes Belkar's personality and life goals! Of course that would not only make Belkar less funny, but also less useful in a fight, so Status Quo Is God...
  • Evil Counterpart
    • Inverted in his Good Counterpart, the late Yokyok, whose father he killed earlier in the comic.
    • Also both inverted and played straight by Yokyok's aforementioned father Yikyik, who's Belkar's counterpart and is genuinely evil because he's just like Belkar.
    • And then Yukyuk, whose relation to Yikyik and Yokyok is currently unknown, but he seems to be as evil as Yikyik.
  • Evil Is Petty: Though he and Yikyik are alike in many, many ways, Belkar despises him simply because he is a kobold.
  • Failed a Spot Check: All the time....
  • Fan Nickname: Originating from his own words -- he is the SEXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR.
  • Fragile Speedster: Roy rather unsubtly shows him that he isn't as good at taking damage as he is at dishing it out, and he should stick to slaughtering Mooks.
  • Gay Bravado: Is "confident enough in his sexuality" that he can make come-ons at Roy to Squick the latter out.
  • Geas: The Mark of Justice. He breaks it half by accident: he kills the Oracle of Sunken Valley, but the Oracle had gotten just enough kobolds to move into the area to technically constitute a settlement.
  • Good Angel, Bad Angel: Nope, it is shown instead that he's got two shoulders devils. The shoulder angel had to be institutionalized.

Angel: (twitching) ...and he kept stabbing them, again and again... He's a halfling, he's supposed to be jolly... Why isn't he jolly? WHY ISN'T HE JOLLY???

Belkar: You know, I think I could make good money writing a guidebook to the jail cells of the world.
Dark but clean, I'd give this three stars -- "Would be incarcerated again."

Belkar: I got your marinade RIGHT HERE!

Belkar: Are you feeling OK? I'm really worried about you.

Belkar: I think they've worked out a good plan to end this pointless conflict without any more lives lost, and I support it fully. Let's stop the violence. (big grin)

  • Pet the Dog
    • Or Pet the Kittycat: Mr. Scruffy is possibly the only thing he's ever cared for unconditionally.
    • There was also the time when he saved the two reptilian bounty hunters by releasing a huge freaking dinosaur to distract the soldiers trying to kill them. It's even pointed out that he could have just waited for the soldiers to kill them before letting loose the Allosaurus, since a bunch of dead guards, on their own, would have been funny. Dead mercenaries that he hated and eaten guards? Hilarious in his eyes. Though this strip reveals that he helped them because it reminded him of his relationship with Mr Scruffy
    • It's never a good idea to point out either of these incidents, however. Or your world will become pain.
  • Pint-Sized Powerhouse
  • Real Men Wear Pink: He has ranks in gourmet cooking, he knows the score to "Meet Me in St. Louis" and his best friend is a small, white housecat.
  • Restraining Bolt: The Mark of Justice. It works even better than Roy's threats of bodily harm. Kept him locked down for a while. It's been removed.
  • Ring of Power: A Ring of Jumping +20; he puts it to very good use.

Belkar: A magic item that can allow me to rain death from above on my enemies AND lets me reach stuff on the top shelf? Done.

Belkar: Hey, Sweet Thing, wanna hold my Rod of Lordly Might? If you press the right button, it might extend!

  • Vision Quest: As a result of his magically-induced hallucination of Lord Shojo, Belkar learns to fake character growth.
  • Wants a Prize For Basic Decency: Parodied in On the Origin Of PCs. Belkar thinks he deserves a reward for the restraint he showed by not killing all the barmaids in a tavern brawl, and suggests that if humans don't want him to murder people, they should put up a sign saying, "Thank you for not killing more than five of us".

Prison Guard: We don't want you to kill ANY of us!
Belkar: Now you're just being unreasonable!


Durkon Thundershield

"I stay 'ere because it's me duty. And bein' a dwarf is all about doin' yer duty, even if it makes ye miserable. ESPECIALLY if it makes ye miserable!"

Race: Dwarf
Gender: Male
Class: Cleric
Alignment: Lawful Good

A dutiful dwarf cleric of Thor, and Roy's oldest friend. Sent away from his homeland by higher-ups, he was slow to adapt to human society, but fits in rather well now. Very pragmatic.

Durkon: I love me god Thor will all me heart -- inna strictly heterosexual "buddies" kinda way. Not that there's anything wrong with the alternative.

Cleric of Loki: Can you tell me anything about him that differentiates him from every other dwarf?

Durkon: I count "able to be picked by a rogue" as a pretty major defect, aye?

  • You Can't Go Home Again: A prophecy stated that Durkon's return to his home would destroy the dwarven homelands. To keep this from happening, the higher-ups sent him off on a Snipe Hunt and told him not to return until they called for him. Which Durkon never did, because he's just that lawful. However, the higher-ups neglected to tell their successors about the prophecy. Durkon can now return whenever he wants, though the message telling him so was destroyed. Though according to the Oracle, he will be returning. Posthumously. The funny thing is, when he found that out, he was actually happy to learn that his body would be returned home, presumably for an honorable burial.


Blackwing

"I prefer to think of myself as a super-advanced flying stealth dinosaur."

Vaarsuvius's raven familiar. V ignored Blackwing for years, and in fact never even named him -- it was Haley who gave the bird its less-than-original moniker. For most of the comic's run, Blackwing just disappeared until V remembered needing him, but now V is trying to make up for the years of neglect, while Blackwing acts as the elf's much-needed conscience.

  • Attention Deficit Ooh Shiny: He is still a raven, after all, and tends to fixate on shiny objects at inopportune times. Blackwing's first reaction to V being turned into a lizard is to try to eat it.

Blackwing: Wait a second, is that a bauble? I could use a shiny new bauble.

Blackwing: Now that you feel my pain, the healing can begin.


Mr. Scruffy

"Meow?"

An ordinary white cat, at first Lord Shojo's pampered pet. He is then adopted by Belkar and becomes his animal companion.

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